Class President Puns

its only a minor election

I’m running for senior class president and my name is Miranda Alfaro, I need a good slogan since my toughest opponent named Chase is “chase your dreams” thank you to whoever makes me one!

In Math class -

Kid: "Do you have a ruler?"

Me: "Not really, he's a President so he's the leader of the Executive Branch, which is one of three branches in charge."

(Completely goes over kid's head)

Kid: "I just need a ruler."

Me: "Ah, I'd say move to Sweden. They have a Monarchy and it's beautiful there."

This was from high school before I became a dad, but I think it still qualifies.

My history teacher was lecturing on the Paris Conference following World War I. Specifically, he was discussing each of the world leaders in attendance and each of their aims for the treaty that would result from the conference.

He was going down the line of leaders and asking the class what each leader wanted in the treaty. For example, "Britain was represented by Prime Minister David Lloyd George. What did Mr. George want in the treaty?"

He got through Britain, France, and Italy, then he came to the United States, represented by President Woodrow Wilson.

He asked, "What did Mr. Wilson want?" I responded, "Dennis out of his life once and for all?"

He and I were the only people who laughed.