Chipotle Puns

...by tex-mexage.

I told her that she’s rice-ist

6.023 x 10^23

Delivery Man: Here's your queso guacamole

Manager: Is that a new flavor of guacamole?

Delivery Man: Nope it's just a case of it.

Call me Guaca-holy.

Me: Steak burrito please.. Chipotle guy: White or brown rice sir? Me: Extra white rice please Chipotle guy: Sir, we only have the one shade of white rice

Took me a while to get it, but when I did, uugghhh. Much respect.

My son and I are waiting in line at Chipotle. This guy next to me starts to order. Guy behind the counter asks him what kind of rice he would like. Guy next to me looks at both, considering brown or white. "White rice" he says. I look him directly in the eyes, pause a moment, and state, loud enough for the line and the employees to hear, "That's rice-ist".

Guacamala

What state is high in the middle and round at the ends?

Ohio.

His chuckle was so pleased.

Those pigs aren't bread, they're pork.

One of the managers is Jose and I asked him, "Did you know there is a whole city in California where no one is named Jose?" "Really, where?" "San Jose! Huehuehue"

Groans all around

Looks like they ran out of chips.

I work at Chipotle, and I spend the mornings bagging chips and putting them up on display. After we opened the cashier said, "those chips are too close together. I almost knocked over some trying to one down."

Without even thinking I said, "yeah, sorry...I run a pretty tight chip."

She didn't laugh. :/

"Chipotle doesn't have ground beef."

Cousin: "Does that mean they have air beef?"

We are both males, and we were at the register at Chipotle...

Chipotle Girl: Are you two together or separate? (referring to the food)

Co-worker: Oh no, we're just friends.

Three other people in line groaned.