Hear the one about the celebrity Italian chef
Last night he just pasta way
Which kind of Swiss cheese always celebrates its birthday?
Star wars celebrity names
Apologies if this breaks the rules however. My friends and I are making up names of star wars characters combined with celebrity names. So far we've come up with Darth spader, sith rogan, and obi wan kobe.
Any others we cant think of?
Me: going to my friends for new year's eve celebration
My dad: See you in a year.
Ps. It happens every damn time
Who was the only celebrity with four body parts in his name?
If the cameramen who take photos of celebrities are the paparazzi...
then the cameramen who take photos of poor people are the pauperazzi
I have started carrying a piece of stone with me to throw at people who sing Christmas songs before Thanksgiving.
It’s my jingle bell rock.
A Japanese zoo just celebrated the birth of a baby elephant
Before that nobody addressed the elephant in the womb.
A pirate wanted to celebrate his captain’s birthday, so he bought a large quantity of balloons while ashore. Back on the ship, he walked over to hand the balloons to the captain, but he tripped and most of them floated away. The captain said, “Arrr! That was a costly mistake...”
“We lost a lot of doubloons.”
On the day my friends were hosting my birthday celebration, I had diarrhea.
My friend asked what I was doing to celebrate my cake day.
I sat silently because I had no re-torte
Who's the most dangerous celebrity?
BREAKING NEWS: Eminem has just become the first celebrity to be diagnosed with Coronavirus..
In a statement released by doctors, it has been revealed that his palms were sweaty, knees weak and arms were heavy.. He presented with vomit on his sweater already.. Initial testing has revealed it was mums spaghetti
What's a bumblebee's favorite celebrity
Excellent work, ought to be celebrated
I went to the candle store to celebrate my cake day...
They were having a blowout sale.
My wife broke up with me at the star wars celebration. An anakin cosplayer came up to me, put his hand on my shoulder, and said...
What a sexist society we live in, today is National Daughter's Day and it's celebrated once a year.....
But we celebrate Son day every week!
Trees celebrating this month as
Today at dinner, my little brother asked me who a skeleton’s favorite celebrity is. I asked who, then he proceeded to Skeletor laugh and say....
My wife celebrated her two year anniversary of getting a breast reduction
She asked if I ever miss them. I always tell her it was her choice not mine and that the mammaries will last forever.
"A happy man is one who has found meaning in life"
My wife and I just celebrated her 32nd birthday yesterday.
It was the fastest birthday party we’ve ever had.
What is a cat's favorite way to celebrate?
How do you call a fight between celebrities?
How do pickles celebrate their cake day?
To all of you who have been disowned by fathers. In honor of pride month and on behalf of all dads of R/dadjokes I just wanna say, buffalo.
Because you can always be our bi-son, and even if you don't feel like shooting straight, we will always be trans-parent with you. You are loved.
My wife’s 32 today but I’m only allowed to celebrate my wife’s birthday for half a minute
After all it is her thirty second birthday
Yesterday I celebrated my thirty second birthday.
It just seems a little unfair that I only get half of a minute when everyone else gets the whole day.
Thought of this while on drugs.
Things you say at a celebrity brothel and at a custom tailors. " yeah, how much is Chris Hemsworth? "
Why do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day ?
They're very scentimental
I like celebrating Fathers' Day, but I'm not a dad.
I guess I'm just a faux pas.
I was driving behind this guy and realized he is celebrating a whole year early!!
Happy Birthday Beethoven
In honor of Ludwig von Beethoven's 250th birthday ...
What is Beethoven doing to celebrate his 250th birthday?
He's decomposing!
Are French speaking people celebrating 420 as well? Or do they just call it 80?
How do celebrities stay cool
My family just celebrated the 200th anniversary of owning a buffalo farm!
Yep. It's our bison-tennial.
What do you call a celebrity that fell down the stairs?
Which celebrity is the worst driver?
Any one of the Car-dashians.
I was driving behind this guy and realized he is celebrating a whole year early!!
It's my 1-year Reddit anniversary
Getting karma should be easy as cake
Edit: It’s a giant cake day celebration! Happy cake day everyone!!
I think when this pandemic is over with, we need to have a day to celebrate truckers, for keeping the country running throughout all this. Maybe October 4th?
This year my dad is celebrating his birthday for half a minute. Why you may ask?
How do celebrities stay cool?
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