After all these years, he still doesn't know my name is Dave...
Wife: The kids moved my bookmark.
Me: all these years and you haven’t learned my name is Austin.
Wife stared at me blankly for a few moments and then went on with her day. Lol
Scratch and sniff!
And I always tell him my name is not Mark
He's 14. You'd think that by now he'd know my name is Troy.
Owl keep your place
I said, "Get off your lazy butt and go get one yourself."
I said sure, let's make one out of paper, ribbon, and colors together. She was very happy.
Making a bookmark for part of my friends xmas gift. We're both botany students, so I'd like to make it plant related.
http://imgur.com/DProikz
I said, “Yes, we have hundreds, but my name’s Dave.”
Weird request but I wanted a pun for when I give my friend her graduation gift. I'm giving her a really nice handmade bookmark. Any help would be appreciated!
I only have my shelf to blame.
....and I burst into tears 🤣. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Memphis.
I burst into tears. "Billy, please stop reposting the same joke for karma, everyone will hate you."
"Then give me the damn bookmark."
I gave him the bookmark.
He finally won.
I gently told him "No" at least 6 times, and finally we were at the register. My wife was checking us out, and he asks again.
Me: "Son, if you ask for one more piece of candy, I'm going to go back in time and take away the candy you had yesterday."
He stopped asking.
My oldest son looks at me defiantly and says, "Okay, do it to me!"
{ thinks for a second }
Me: "Fine. Do you remember that Snickers bar you had yesterday?"
Oldest looks confused and says, "What?? I didn't have a Snickers bar yesterday!"
Me: "Exactly."
I pat him on the back as he processes, and we exit the store.
My son asked me this question "Can I get a bookmark?" Now I'm crying because after 21 years my son still doesn't know my name is Lucas
A panda goes into a restaurant and orders some bamboo for dinner. After he is done he asks the waiter for the bill.
As the waiter approaches he pulls out a semi-automatic and starts opening fire.
The scared and confused waiter asks him why is he doing all this.
The Panda just hands him a dictionary with a bookmark pointing to panda.
Panda: Eats shoots and leaves
I started crying... he's 11 and still doesn't know my name is Stephen.
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
Absolute idiot. He's 13 and still doesn't know my name is paul.
My son came up to me and said, “can I have a bookmark?” I started crying, 10 years and he still doesn’t know my name is brad.
