Did you know that musician Bob Seger wanted to be a chess master?

He was always working on his knight moves...

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_bradley
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 19 2021
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I named my printer Bob Marley

Because it's always Jammin'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 48
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/icemage27
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
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I have a friend named bob

Me:Bob has no arms

Me:knock knock

Six year old: Who's there?

Me: not bob! (Cue laughter)

Six year old: bob who?...

Fuck it

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nephrenra
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 25 2020
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What do you call Bob the Builder when he is unemployed?

Bob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 72
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickypie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 15 2020
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What was Bob Marley's favorite seasoning?

Oreggaeno

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/enjoyinglifetoday
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 19 2020
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Last month my doctor told me, "Bob, this is seriously urgent. You really have to start drinking less vodka."

I've been out to at least 40 different bars since then, but no one seems to carry that brand. Anyone know where to find it?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BuhoBuhoGris
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2020
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A police officer, notorious for bad spelling, is set to interrogate three theives, Tim, Bob, and Joe.

When asked who he thinks will give up the location stolen goods, he replys β€œOnly Time will tell”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/StefanE30325i
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 21 2020
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Bob:.. I went to see my doctor about having a vasectomy Jack:.. " That's a pretty big decision, have you talked it over with your family?"

Bob:..."Yes, they're in favor of it, 14 to 3..."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 17 2020
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How does Bob Marley like his donuts??

With "jammin"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/burgersandchips2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 05 2020
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What do you say when you see Bob Marley cooking?

What Jamaican?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zZREQUIEMZz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2020
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Did you hear that Bob Barker died?

He got hit by a brAND NEW CAAAAAR!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/millre01
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2020
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What would Bob Ross be called if he was a dentist?

Bob Floss.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MR_TRUMP_Vincent2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 04 2020
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At Bob's retirement party the Director stands up and says "I'd just like to say a word about Bob", clears his throat and then says, "plethora",

Bob turns to him and says, "thank you, that means a lot".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nomadic187187
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2020
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How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?

With Jam in...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bridges1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 05 2020
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[Request] Can anyone please help me come up with a business name that is a Bob's Burgers-level pun?

The neighboring store front and exterminator van in the opening credits have the best punny business names and always crack me up. I'm a fan and would love to name my business in a similar fashion. ETA Examples: I'd Hit That Boxing Gym. Lady and the Clamp, Hardware for Her. A Fridge Too Far. Cupid's Stupid, Divorce Attorneys. A Ton in the Oven, Big and Tall Baby Clothes. Let's Scissor! Collage Studio. Don't Stop Bereaving, Grief Counseling.

But I am So. Stuck.

A little background about my business idea: I'm a personal/sometimes virtual assistant specializing in household admin and management. I'm marketing mostly towards blue collar men who might be widows/divorcees who never had to worry about the general finances and household paperwork. Some of the services offered are: budget setting, bill paying, appointment setting/calendar management, travel arrangements, errands, personal & grocery shopping, pet & house sitting, etc...

I'm ready to take the next steps in making this an actual business and take out some ad space, but the perfectionist in me NEEDS a brilliant name. Can someone please help me? The best I can come up with is some sort of play on Pepper Potts, but I see quite a few VAs out there with that as a business name. I will gift a platinum to the one I like the best if that's appropriate.

Thank you in advance! πŸ”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EmElleGee31
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 31 2020
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Bob Dylan came to my house the day after Daylight Savings and adjusted all of my clocks.

He said the times they were a-changin’.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bjlind718
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 09 2020
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Well,Bob just decrypted.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/puggzu
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2020
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I once won silver for curling and bronze for the Bob

...yet hairdresser of year still eludes me.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 23 2020
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Simple Bob walks into a bar and says, Hey everybody...I got a job.

A barfly yells back at him...How is it something so stupid can get a job? Aren't you stupid?

Simple Bob smiles and says, No because if it's stupid and it works...It ain't stupid.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/catonmyshoulder69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 24 2020
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Well Bobs your uncle
πŸ‘οΈŽ 63
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/eeeeeeeeeeek_7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 07 2019
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Bob Cat
πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frateeeezzeeee
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 21 2019
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Bob the Boulder [OC]
πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pununciation
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2019
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I named my stapler at work Bob Marley.

Because it keeps jamin’

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/platformjuan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 24 2019
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Bob takes a stroll while talking about an old shoot 'em up

Yeah, he's a walking Contra-diction.

Alternative for the logic nerds:

Bob is always honest, and he says he doesn't like shoot 'em ups. His identical twin Joe says he loves shoot 'em ups. How do we know Joe is honest? Because if something is true, then so is its Contra-positive.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IceMetalPunk
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 24 2019
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What was Bob the builder called when he retired

Bob

πŸ‘οΈŽ 434
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/shipsmate
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 26 2018
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Bob Dylan bought a watch made of a toilet flush and Bombay Sapphire.

The times they are a chain gin.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2019
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Bob Seger was once playing Chess

That's when he noticed, "Ain't it funny how the knight moves?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/xwhy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2019
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"Did you hear about Bob falling into the well?"

"Oh my, how did that happen?"

"He didnt see that well."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/haravava
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 15 2019
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I have a friend named Bob

He hates it when I say his name backwards

πŸ‘οΈŽ 53
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarch3092
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 07 2019
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How did bob marley propose anna?

. . . He said "i want to marijuana".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Drdoofinschmirtz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 15 2019
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Sideshow Bob could never get a job at Moe's Tavern

Because of his many past failures with Bart-ending.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/xwhy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 09 2017
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Two friends Bob and Frank are lost in the jungle when they are surrounded by a group of blood thirsty cannibals.

They are surrounded by dozens of the fierce blood thirsty warriors armed with clubs and spears. The leader of the warriors approaches the two friends and informs them they are trespassing on sacred land and unless they can prove they are descendants of the Gods they will be killed and eaten.

Bob and Frank realize they have little choice but agree they will attempt any test to try to save their lives.

The chief warrior brings them a bowl full of angry fire ants and drops one small seed into the bowl. He informs them they must put their lips in the bowl and suck as hard as they can. If they manage to suck up only the seed without sucking up an ant then the tribe would know they must be sent from the Gods.

Bob looks wearily at Frank but knowing they have no other options he puts his lips in the bowl and sucks hard. He immediately gets a mouth full of ants and screams in pain as they bite away at the inside of his mouth. Frank now even more nervous takes his turn and to his dismay also receives a nasty mouthful of the viscous buggers.

The warriors leap to their feet and surround the friends, β€œNow you must die” declares the chieftain. Just as the first spear is raised to Franks throat he screams β€œTria-Gan!” The warriors stop dead in their tracks. β€œWhat did you say” asked the chief. β€œTria-Gan” yelled frank again. Immediately the chief and his warriors turned and fled into the forest.

β€œHoly shit” said Bob β€œWhat did you just say and how did you know it would work?”

β€œWell” said Frank, β€œmy Mother always told me if at first you don’t suck seed try Tria-Gan.”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/usernamemispeled
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2019
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How does Bob Marley like his donuts?

With jam in.

What does Bob Marley say to his friends when they come around for donuts and coffee?

"I hope you like jam in too"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ARushandaPush
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 31 2019
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A couple of decades ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope, and Steve Jobs. Now, there's no cash, no hope, and no jobs...

For the love of God, don't let Kevin Bacon pass away

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Chateau512
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 11 2019
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Stranger: "Bob? Is that short for Robert?"

Bobert: "No."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 93
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TarOfficial
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2018
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Family asked why I named my printer at home Bob Marley

Because it’s always jammin’

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ntuso
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2019
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What do you call a banana named Bob?

Bobnana

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/THATonERedDiTuseR1
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 27 2019
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Did you hear that Bob Barker died?

He got hit by a BRAND NEW CAR!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/millre01
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 24 2020
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What does Bob Dylan say during daylight savings time?

The Times They Are a-Changin'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bobsagetsarmpithair
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 23 2019
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I named my printer Bob Marley

because it keeps jammin'

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BritSarcasm
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 30 2019
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