They drive me up the wall..
You just have to listen varicosely
Turns out it was a Type-O
I only have my shelf to blame!
Luckily I was still up playing my drums.
Dad: Relax love it's serving lunch.
Credit goes to my friend who made the joke
But the thing only makes pennies. I understand now why it was so cheap. It makes cents
To get in touch with the other side.
I think she's ghosting me
So I just packed up my things and right
But they all suck.
I guess you could say that the "Joker" without an R is just a joke.
Co-Mando.
(Credit to my girlfriend)
He says, “I’m applying the turn-a-cut!”
My gf is on her period. I have been telling her all day period puns and jokes. I am all out and i need your help
A bloody nun.
I said, "He must be bloody good, I don't have a son."
We all looked for the ear so we could take it to hospital to get it sewn on. Whats this here. And shows us a bloody ear. The builder said i dont know whos that ear is its not mine. How can you tell we asked. Cos mine had a pencil behind it!
I didn’t expect it to be a period piece
Still only managed to get 10% off....
Let that sink in.
...but I blew my nose and it’s snot.
Because he was scared of stakes
"Would you like some bacon and eggs, a slice of toast, and maybe some grapefruit juice and coffee?"
He declines. "Thanks for asking, but I'm not hungry right now. It must be the Viagra," he says. "It's really taken the edge off my appetite.
At lunchtime, she asks him if he'd like something. "How about a bowl of soup, homemade muffins, or a cheese sandwich?"
He declines. "The Viagra," he says, "really trashes my desire for food.
Come dinner time, she asks if he wants anything to eat. "Would you like a juicy rib eye steak and some scrumptious apple pie? Or maybe a rotisserie chicken or tasty stir fry?"
He declines again. "No," he says, "it's got to be the Viagra. I'm still not hungry."
"Well," she says: ""Can you now stop and get off me? I'm bloody starving!!".
Jeffrey Dahmer: shuts off blender “Aww...”
Numbers not divisible by 2.
You're my neck-st victim.
Because it's a reddit
...it's a rare treat.
Mt. Rushmore.
I yelled back, because it’s bloody vessel!
Hope requests are allowed, I have a vampire ( or similar) running an inn, "Bring out your bread" in a tabletop game and I need ideas for food and drinks. Currently I have steak, bloody Mary, Ham Helsing, and Bram Sausages Dracula ( that one didn't really work when I played it)
Any suggestions
Coming over here, demanding to know what love is!
