From the mouths of babes (in this case my seven year old daughter as I was leaving this morning...)

Daughter: Dad, it's really STUPID out there today. You'd better take your dumbrella.

Me: I've never been more proud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2020
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My wife asked if I would like to BBQ some brats for dinner. I said, β€œNo way, babe.”

β€œBrats are the wurst.”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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I said to my wife β€œI hate to tell you this babe, but your bathing suit is too revealing and tight”

She said β€œthen wear your own one then”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigpapastu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2020
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She: Babes I'm pregnant!! I wonder what our son is gonna look like.

Me: nah, he's gonna wonder what I look like.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/asisdeo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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β€œWhat are you doing up there babe?”

Her: β€œWriting a letter.”

Me: β€œWhich one? S? K? M?”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HollywooDcizzle
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08 2020
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Ok babe, I have a question. I'm pretty sure the answer is no...

...but what is the opposite of yes?

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/artvandelay440
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2020
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(to my wife this morning): Ugh, babe, think i have that Corona virus. Her (seriously): Oh my gosh, what do you mean?

Me: I had one too many Coronas last night and i'm not feeling that great.

Her:(rolls eyes and leaves the bedroom)

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/guitarman61192
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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Wife yells from kitchen: Babe, we're almost out of trash bags...

I yelled back: Well why do you keep throwing them away?

I got a very stern look.

πŸ‘︎ 320
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lboogie09
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
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β€œBabe you’re not giving me mushroom”
πŸ‘︎ 175
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mark_ryan2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
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My dad just used this pickup line on my mom at breakfast: "Hey Babe..... do you have an inhaler?"

".....cuz you got dat assssss, ma!"

I spit out my cornflakes and ironically was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe.

πŸ‘︎ 331
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2017
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Who's the Babe? imgur.com/MYY2T8c
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pkacgu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2013
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Did you hear the Islamic music group who covered "I've Got You Babe?"

Sunni and Shia

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pastad
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2018
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Hey babe. Do you have aphantasia? reddit.com/r/Aphantasia/c…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/idraw4l1f3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2018
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She said resolve the CAPCHA, I said babes...

Mans not bot

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sneakergod03
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2018
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I was telling my girlfriend about how I needed to get something out of my truck. I guess I must have said this before, because she responded, "I'm aware, babe."

I responded, "So you are only a babe during full moons?"

πŸ‘︎ 295
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lunatic721
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2015
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"Babe can you move over?" "But I don't have mushroom."

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C1YAA2xXAAE0Tcx.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BreakingGarrick
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2017
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Did you hear what happened when Babe Ruth finally quit playing for the Yankees?

The team became ruthless.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gronke
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2017
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Hey babe! There are holes in all of your socks!

Wife: Really?? What the hell happened?

Me: They must have been made that way. How else would you be able to get your feet into them?

Wife: eyeroll

God I'm good!

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thebestisyetocome
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2016
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