Assailing Puns

A list of puns related to "Assailing"

Just when I thought today couldn't get any worse, an unknown assailant threw soy sauce all over me.

Whoever it is sure knows how to Kikkoman when he's down.

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👤︎ u/MyIndiscretions
📅︎ Jan 21 2022
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Did you hear? An attempted murder was foiled due to the assailant's severe grain allergy.

The killer was found, dead to rice.

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👤︎ u/DarkKing16
📅︎ Jun 03 2021
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A chemical warehouse was robbed at gunpoint, the assailants cleaned out all stores of substances with pH above 7.

"All your base are belong to us"

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👤︎ u/HiddenLayer5
📅︎ Dec 10 2019
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If a paid political message uses a pun to assail a candidate’s character...

Is it an Ad Homonym attack?

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👤︎ u/OneSidedDice
📅︎ Mar 03 2020
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A turtle, making its way through a field, got mugged by a gang of snails.

Later a policeman asked the turtle, “Can you describe your assailants?”

The turtle replied, “I don’t know. It happened too fast.”

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👤︎ u/professorf
📅︎ Oct 07 2021
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What did the assailant say right before stabbing a group of comedians gathered on the front of a cruise ship?

Watch me cut this deck of cards.

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👤︎ u/ghost_of_huntz_hall
📅︎ Jan 06 2017
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During a D&D game

Our party had just been attacked by an unknown assailant.

DM: Roll a spot check

Me: 12

DM: You see jack shit

Me: Okay, I yell, "Jack, this is not the time for that, we are being attacked!"

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👤︎ u/warwick213
📅︎ Nov 03 2014
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