There was a man that wasn't allowed to fart.

Since he started dating, his girlfriend would chastise him to great lengths everytime he felt the need to fart.

After they got married, the situation was maintained. He couldn't possibly fart near his wife. Sometimes he had to leave the house, just to pass some gas.

When he was really old, he died peacefully during in his sleep while lying on his back. She called the undertaker, so the arrangements for the funeral could be made.

When the undertaker rolled the man of the bed, there was a massive fart. The undertaker looked to the now widow to see how she was going to react, but she simply said:

"No need to chastise him anymore. Hee can RIP in Peace!"

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👤︎ u/DangerASA
📅︎ Aug 24 2020
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My wife got on to our 17 month old for standing on her alphabet book...

I tell her "leave her alone, she's trying to stay on top of her education."

Wife still won't admit it was funny. :(

*edit for grammar.

👍︎ 909
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📅︎ Feb 20 2018
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My daughter just called someone a a-hole

I chastised her saying, “Where did you learn to talk like that? It’s ‘AN a-hole,”

👍︎ 35
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👤︎ u/expta
📅︎ Jul 27 2019
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