I work in electrical wholesale and this is particularly apt.
πŸ‘︎ 4k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joey1018
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
The fruit name "Lychees" is apt

It's a lie, they contain no cheese.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/goldfishpaws
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2016
🚨︎ report
An Apt Comparison

I was told that /r/dadjokes would enjoy this: http://mountsaintawesome.com/comic.php?id=99

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DorkRawk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2015
🚨︎ report
My mom teased my dad, he didn't get a sandwhich after his reply.

My mom teased my dad by calling him gay. This is how my Dad retaliated.

Dad: your ex boyfriend was hot .

Mom: which one?

Dad: Me

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IAEInferno
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2017
🚨︎ report
I showed my girlfriend the screaming phone app

After she saw how it works, she thought it was aptly named.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/B_Rich
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2018
🚨︎ report
The lever bee.

This was always one of my dad's favorites to tell us.

A long time ago, there was a beehive in the middle of a forest. Every day, as worker bees do, they would go out into their fields, gather pollen from the flowers, and bring it back to make honey.

The bees had a problem, though, because every so often an intruder would come around, such as a bear who wanted the honey, or kids who thought it'd be fun to throw rocks at the hive. Finally, the bees got tired of it.

Being the intelligent bees that they are, they built an alarm system for the hive. They built it such that one bee pulls a lever, which triggers the alarm that the bees will hear from the fields, and then the bees can come back to protect their home.

There was one bee who was exclusively assigned that job, and he was aptly named the "Lever Bee." His job was to watch for potential adversaries, and pull the lever to raise the alarm.

Now clearly, the safety of the hive depends on this one Lever Bee. So it stands to reason that he has to be constantly ready and on the alert so that he can do his job.

And that, friends, is why people say, "I'm as ready as a Lever Bee."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kentron
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2013
🚨︎ report
Studying for my MCAT when I came across this passage in Verbal.

I have written this book to sweep away all misunderstandings about the crafty art of punnery and to convince you that the pun is well worth celebrating.... After all, the pun is mightier than the sword, and these days you are much more likely to run into a pun than into a sword. [A pun is a witticism involving the playful use of a word in different senses, or of words which differ in meaning but sound alike.]

Scoffing at puns seems to be a conditioned reflex, and through the centuries a steady barrage of libel and slander has been aimed at the practice of punning. Nearly three hundred years ago John Dennis sneered, β€œA pun is the lowest form of wit,” a charge that has been butted and rebutted by a mighty line of pundits and punheads.

Henry Erskine, for example, has protested that if a pun is the lowest form of wit, β€œIt is, therefore, the foundation of all wit.” Oscar Levant has added a tag line: β€œA pun is the lowest form of humorβ€”when you don’t think of it first.” John Crosbie and Bob Davies have responded to Dennis with hot, cross puns: β€œ...If someone complains that punning is the lowest form of humor you can tell them that poetry is verse.”

Samuel Johnson, the eighteenth century self-appointed custodian of the English language, once thundered, β€œTo trifle with the vocabulary which is the vehicle of social intercourse is to tamper with the currency of human intelligence. He who would violate the sanctities of his mother tongue would invade the recesses of the national till without remorse... ”

Joseph Addison pronounced that the seeds of punning are in the minds of all men, and tho’ they may be subdued by reason, reflection, and good sense, they will be very apt to shoot up in the greatest genius, that which is not broken and cultivated by the rules of art.

Far from being invertebrate, the inveterate punster is a brave entertainer. He or she loves to create a three-ring circus of words: words clowning, words teetering on tightropes, words swinging from tent tops, words thrusting their head into the mouths of lions. Punnery can be highly entertaining, but it is always a risky business. The humor can fall on its face, it can lose its balance and plunge into the sawdust, or it can be decapitated by the snapping shut of jaws. While circus performers often receive laughter or applause for their efforts, punsters often draw an obligatory groan for theirs. But the fact that most people groan at, rather than laugh at, puns doesn’t mean that the punnery isn’t fu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zil2mz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2014
🚨︎ report
Dad joked my roommate

My roommate texts me: I can't get our ducking apt door open (obvious typo)

My response: You just have to push real hard to quack it open

πŸ‘︎ 133
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ramsr
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2014
🚨︎ report
Dadjoked my brother

I was listening to this song with my brother, and I said, "it's very apt that they are playing this song where they are."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AceHigh7
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.