Window blind Puns

Dunno why the she had to throw shade on my pursuit...

I SHUTTER when I think where I’d be without this job.

if it wasn't for them, it would've been curtains for us all.

Me: The blind guy came today
Dad: Was he wearing glasses?
Me: Yeah, how did you know?
Dad: Did he have a cane and a seeing eye dog?
Me: doh!

He writes a check for the "blind man," pauses, and says "should I write this in brail?"

I said, “Why would I want two empty glasses?”

He looks at the bare windows and says to the bartender, "want to be blinded?"

1. What is the most important drink in life?

Vitali-tea.

2. What do you call an uptight man with wet tapestry?

A wet blanket with a wet blanket.

3. Describe an uptight man with an erection holding an alcoholic beverage.

A stiff with a stiff with a stiff.

4. What do you call introverted window blinds?

A shutter-in.

5. What do you call an uncooked deer cookie?

Dat doe dough 'dough.

6. What do you call a plant's religion?

Agri-culture.

7. What do you call a football players' phone charger?

A Charger's phone charger.

8. What do you call a clock tower striking twelve?

High noon.

That's all I got.

two customers who know each other begin with the usual greeting (hi, how are you?)

Man1: So what are you here for?

Man2: Coming to get some blinds (similar to window curtains)

Man1: Blinds? Why don't you just cover you eyes?

Man1 then proceeds to cover his eyes whilst having a very hearty chuckle.