I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.
Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.
Do your worst!
I'm surprised it hasn't decade.
Hello everyone. If you're confused as to why this is Chapter 28 and not 27, please go read the previous post, which explains why. The long and short of it is, there is a changed release schedule, we have jumped up to thursday/sunday releases now.
This is a much longer chapter than 28 was, and will lay out the upcoming plot stuff you can look forwards to, as well as just some fun stuff anyway. Hope you all enjoy it, it was a blast to write. Foster does get massively shortchanged in this one, I will admit, but I didn't want to duplicate scenes across both characters.
Kittaning, Pennyslvania
Tergelyx stood waiting, under a tarpaulin, the rain outside too heavy for anyone to want to stand out in it. A few members of 2 Platoon sat, either on random chairs they'd been able to find in the nearby town, or on the grass, while the rest stood. They were waiting, Lt Faulder having called a meeting, without having given much explanation. The situation, naturally, gave rise to much chatter, but when Lt Faulder stepped out of the small building that now served as Company HQ, most went silent.
Faulder walked up to the side of his Warrior, the one he always used for his mission briefings. Given there were no photos, maps, or anything pinned to it’s side, Tergelyx had a distinct feeling this wouldn’t just be preparing for some random mission. No, something big was probably about to happen. Before he could begin, Sergeant Fletcher walked over to the last few soldiers who were talking, looking over menacingly until they went quiet. With that dealt with, Faulder began to speak.
“Yes, to get it out of the way. The rumours are true. The war on Earth is close to over. At 0200 this morning, the president of the United States announced the complete collapse of organised Hekatian forces in North America. The last Hekatian pocket in Britain, in Bexhill, was announced destroyed yesterday, at 1600. Hekatian forces in India are sustaining heavy losses, and word from on high is they’re sending Combat Cell 4, so the Indians can get their little bit of pride in. Expectation is that the Hekatian forces there will not survive the next two weeks. Meanwhile, the Iranians, Syrians and Israelis are reportedly in the middle of a large counteroffensive that has driven the Hekatians out of Jordan and Kuwait. We
... keep reading on reddit ➡For context I'm a Refuse Driver (Garbage man) & today I was on food waste. After I'd tipped I was checking the wagon for any defects when I spotted a lone pea balanced on the lifts.
I said "hey look, an escaPEA"
No one near me but it didn't half make me laugh for a good hour or so!
Edit: I can't believe how much this has blown up. Thank you everyone I've had a blast reading through the replies 😂
It really does, I swear!
Turrets:
2 fire grenade turrets: Once you get to lv 15 in turret armor, having 2 of these will double the damage of EVERY other turret. Try to have them by the second night. do NOT, repeat DO NOT make them into tar grenade turrets. Keep upgrading them to fire. The effect supposedly stacks, so if a teammate has lv 15 and 2 fire turrets, damage could go up to x4, and so on.
2 cannon turrets: idk someone said to try it, I tried it, it works wonders. Keep in mind they don't have a lot of range. Prioritize making the fire turrets first though.
Weapons:
-
shorty: Really good when packed to 5. Short distance. Chews through Gunners like cheese.
-
HS2126: It's a shotgun, shoots a lot at once, go figure. Honestly? Almost any shotgun is a good choice... depending of your strategy.
-
Ray Gun: After pack, it kills ridiculously quickly and (I think?) one-shots most enemies.
-
a sniper: to kill necromancers.
What I personally use:
-
PP Bizon: Cheap, easy-to-find ammo, makes RIDICULOUS amounts of damage with only pack 1, giant mag capacity, and the lack of recoil makes it easy to kill necromancers from a fairly long distance. Recommended for people whose frame rate drops a lot (like me!) My loadout isn't that great since I use the Haunted Haystack for the cool blueprint, but prioritize mag capacity and damage range.
-
Holger: As I said, my frame rate drops a lot. Being able to spray zombies on stop motion until my frame rate gets better helps. In Nightmare, it's the little things that help you win. However, once I have Bizon packed to 5, I don't need anything else, but I have Weapon Damage on lv 20, so test whatever works better for you.
General Strategy:
(chopper = helicopter btw)
Day 1:
-
Get on the chopper and drop at either Fracking Towers, Factory, or Turbine. In Fracking Towers, between two lava pools, there's a small building that leads to an underground place with TONS of good loot. REMEMBER: the "main buildings" are usually the ones with the most loot and the best loot.
-
Try to find at least 3 Pedestals lv to make a grenade turret.
-
Grab absolutely every explosive you see, but if you need to choose, prioritize molotovs. They temporarily stop Gunners from moving.
Night 1:
-
Upgrade your turret to grenade. Put it on a very "middle" ground so it can shoot to pretty much anywhere.
-
During the first few seconds, zombies will spawn from one side, possibly Wardens. Af
They’re on standbi
Not really much to say, except I hope you all had a good Christmas and a good new year.
Woodland, Somewhere east of New Kensington, Pennsylvania
“God damn, hard to process how huge they are isn’t it.” Curtis said as the UNV Surcouf flew overhead. It was just a hundred metres above the ground, which was practically scraping the ground when you were a few hundred metres long. Several helicopters flew past it, transports from one of the carrier model Fox-types. Tergelyx supposed that maybe a Super Osprey didn’t count as a helicopter, but that was not his area of expertise. He noted that of the two types of vehicles, the Super Ospreys were far louder, the Surcouf practically gliding effortlessly.
“Yeah. Takes your breath away every time.” Camp replied.
1 Section were all lying on the ground, watching the aerial display. After the conclusion of the battle, and the surrender of a large Rebel force to 2 Platoon, they'd been allowed... time off. The rest of their battalion had arrived, effortlessly pushing through the increasingly chaotic and disorganised Hekatian frontlines, with those arrivals quickly being given the job of perimeter security, while the exhausted 2 Platoon rested. In the sky above, several of the transports broke off from the main group and headed towards the position of 2 Platoon.
“Looks like those are coming in now. Where will they land?”
“Eh, there’s a clearing nearby for them.” Heppell replied to Hill, trying to nap on the ground.
“I’d guess they’re here to take over what few jobs we have left in this fight.” Cooper noted. She was doing a lot better than expected after her injury, having been checked over by plenty of medics at this point. Of course, her occasional swears of pain showed it wasn't all perfect for her, but she was at least able to stick around for what Tergelyx reckoned to be the final leg of the campaign.
“What is our job at this point?” Ivegbuna asked.
“I dunno. What do you do when the enemy is fighting itself?”
“Drink?” Camp offered.
“Probably.”
“Afternoon people.” Sergeant Fletcher’s voice became audible behind the group. No one turned their heads, since they didn’t really care to.
“Afternoon Sarge.”
“Them lot there are from AFCOM,
... keep reading on reddit ➡For those who have given up or about to give up - Don't!
Necromancy: It's a dying art...
I lost 1663 Floors due to DC's and DX11 errors. Estimated 125 Hours lost due to things outside of my control....
2,903 Floors until my clear, and I was running quite a bit before I started recording my death log....
Speaking of which...
Floor 180 (MCH) - Died to trounce while in lust because I didn't understand the bosses rotation as well as I thought I did.
Floor 180 (MCH) - Didn't stack gauges before meteor, accidentally pushed boss below 15% and panicked. (Tincture Strat - Boss 7%)
Floor 180 (MCH) - Executed rotation but forgot to weave the second charge of Gauss and Ricochet (Tincture Stat - Boss 3%)
Floor 140 (MCH) - Was trying to test out MCH rotation as if I was on floor 180 boss. Forgot to sustain before lust and died.
Floor 60 (MCH) - Was distracted by memes. Knocked back into an orb.
Floor 80 (MCH) - D/C Wireless turned off.
Floor 91 (MCH) - DX11 Error as the game was loading floor
Floor 174 (MCH) - Mimic - No items - Thought I could kite out the damage, I was wrong. Didn't have to raising though I had 3 available.
Floor 146 (RDM) - Hit luring trap, thought I could heal through it without steel. Spoilers - I couldn't. Popped witching but it was too late.
Floor 71 (RDM) - DC'd about 15 seconds after entering the floor.
Floor 11 (RDM) - DC'd.
Floor 27 (RDM) - DC'd.
Floor 31 (RDM) - DC'd.
Floor 111 (RDM) - DC'd
Floor 150 (RDM) - Got clipped by void fire.
Floor 180 (MCH) - Got boss to .23% but didn't weave one gause round which I personally believe to have been the cause of this. Drill literally hit as the last meteor went down... I'm calling this a tie. Behemoth is a pizza burn on the roof of the world's mouth... (Tincture Strat)
Floor 34 (MCH) - DC
Floor 167 (MCH) - DC....
Floor 180 (MCH) - Died but got a second attempt because I had about 15m on the clock when I got the boss - fight lasts around 7m 45s if your rotation is near perfect. Stop most CDs at 40%, you can lust around 20%. Died the first time because I panicked when looking at the time remaining on my buffs - was likely fine but was freaking out. Died the second time because I had 30s on the clock and HAD to start blowing him up at the first Cherbys(sp) after lighting on 3 Cherbys vs on the second Charybdis cast. (Tincture strat)
Floor 100 (MCH
... keep reading on reddit ➡
Pilot on me!!
Nothing, he was gladiator.
Because she wanted to see the task manager.
Dad jokes are supposed to be jokes you can tell a kid and they will understand it and find it funny.
This sub is mostly just NSFW puns now.
If it needs a NSFW tag it's not a dad joke. There should just be a NSFW puns subreddit for that.
Edit* I'm not replying any longer and turning off notifications but to all those that say "no one cares", there sure are a lot of you arguing about it. Maybe I'm wrong but you people don't need to be rude about it. If you really don't care, don't comment.
I won't be doing that today!
I recently finished my first megabase that works. I say that because the 1350 SPM base I made a while ago ended up only doing 800 SPM after about 10 hours, because I designed it poorly. Instead of trying to fix up that base, I decided to completely start over from the ground up with the lessons I learned, and double the goal to 2700 SPM, and this base is working perfectly :D
If you prefer a video tour, I linked it at the bottom.
My main goal was to make this base as compact and dense as possible while also being train based, and having minimal direct insertion, because direct insertion is boring to look at in my opinion. This factory does 2700 SPM, and has been stable for about 15 hours.
I have 900 hours total in Factorio. This save file has 250 hours. The first 30 were spent researching all technologies with the starter base, then I converted the starter base to tier 3 module production when all technologies were researched. The next 170 hours were spent building the megabase around the starter base, then I activated the megabase and it has been getting up to speed for the last 50 hours, and doing 2700 SPM consistently for the last 15 hours.
2700 SPM at 60 UPS for 10 hours so far
I play on a gaming laptop and just barely get 60 UPS/FPS, at about 14.5 millisecond update time. This game was done completely in vanilla survival mode, with biters and pollution on, so I was worried I wasn't going to get 60 UPS, so I did some UPS optimization like inserter clocking on smelters, and some 12 beacon setups instead of completely 8 beacon setups. Thankfully this has helped me stay at 60 UPS. I know there is much more I could have done to optimize for UPS, though. but I sacrificed that for aesthetics.
Power:
-20 GW total
-15 GW from 281,000 solar panels and 240,000 accumulators
-5 GW from 40 nuclear reactors and 960 steam turbines
-I would have went totally solar but I ran out of space and had to throw down a casual 40 nuclear reactors. Maybe I'll landfill some area up north and put more solar to get rid of the nuclear, if
... keep reading on reddit ➡Overseer Jul’Masi Audio Log #001736
Stardate year - 521,462
Guardian world updates:
System 97P - 1: Multicellular life has been found on the surface. Discontinuing interference. Waiting for the Committee to decide how to proceed.
System 73H - 3: The pas'kal have thrown themselves back into the stone age after nuclear civil war. Disappointing. They showed great promise.
System 83B - 2: The yaz have finally made contact with us. I am very excited. I have been waiting anxiously for them to reach the stars.
System 42S - 3: The species of primates here are developing exceptionally fast. It has been interesting watching them grow. They have -
"Overseer Jul'Masi."
Jul'Masi turned to his new assistant standing in the doorway. The excitement on her face was impossible to miss.
She continued, "The terraforming is finished."
Jul'Masi perked up at the news. "Ah! Finally." He placed his recorder on his desk. "Let us take a look, shall we?"
He left his office with his assistant close behind. They walked through the halls of the ship to reach the observation deck. There, they looked down on the once barren world they had been painstakingly terraforming for over a century.
"It looks just like home, does it not?" Jul'Masi turned to his assistant, then noticed her arm. "Nuri'Zan, have you been picking at your scales?"
Nuri'Zan grabbed her arm and bowed her head. "Sorry sir." She looked back up at her boss with renewed vigor. "I just can't sit still. This is all just so exciting! I get to be part of the Guardian Project," she gestured to Jul'Masi, "and work under the 'Great Jul'Masi'"
Jul'Masi smirked, "Don't flatter me. It goes right to my head.” He returned to looking at New Etkigto. "And all the wildlife has been introduced?"
"It's all done. You wouldn't even be able to tell the difference. As for the," Nuri'Zan hesitated, "well, our people, they are all in stasis, prepped, and ready to be transported on your word."
"Very good."
When the akigtee left their home system nearly half a million years ago, they hoped they would be joining other species among the stars.
Yet they found themselves alone.
They discovered that they were the first to develop faster than light travel. Every other species they found was still confined to their home s
... keep reading on reddit ➡
[Removed]
This morning, my 4 year old daughter.
Daughter: I'm hungry
Me: nerves building, smile widening
Me: Hi hungry, I'm dad.
She had no idea what was going on but I finally did it.
Thank you all for listening.
You take away their little brooms
What is this?
The idea behind the monthly community map is to share a map exchange string at the beginning of every month, and get as many people as we can to start a new world with it. Then at the end of the month (or even periodically if you'd prefer!) we share screenshots and saves of our factories so that we can see how different people approach the same spawn; how they set up their base, how they deal with aliens, and how they arrange their science, power, and everything else.
I hope it can highlight how many different ways there are to do things, inspire some new designs, and maybe seeing how veteran Factorio players tackle problems will help out new players facing the exact same problems. (Of course, there's also the fact that it'll be interesting to see all of the different possible factories - the good, the bad, and the ugly.)
Last Month's Results
The Community Map
A new dawn, a new day, a new year, and a new Bob's and Angel's map! I look forward to these every year, and at this point a year without a Bob's/Angel's game just wouldn't feel right. I've been hyping this up for quite a while, and I hope you've been looking forward to it to, so now that the time has come let's jump right into it - onto the mod list!
Required Mod:
Angel's Petrochemical Processing
Angel's Addons - Storage Options
Bob's Metals, Chemicals and Intermediates
[Bob's Assembling machines](https://mods.factorio.com/mod/bo
... keep reading on reddit ➡It was about a weak back.
When I got home, they were still there.
What did 0 say to 8 ?
" Nice Belt "
So What did 3 say to 8 ?
" Hey, you two stop making out "
Where ever you left it 🤷♀️🤭
There hasn't been a post all year!
