I went to pick up my son the other day, and there was a static shock. I realized it's true what they say...

Having kids grounds you

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jetpacmonkey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2017
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My new sweater kept building up static and shocking people.

So I exchanged it for another free of charge.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
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A sweater I purchased was picking up static electricity, so I returned it to the store.

They gave me another one, free of charge.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dirtybirdal
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
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I asked my daughter why her electrician boyfriend didn’t show up for their date.

No shock: He was grounded

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nyarlathotep4King
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2018
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Excellent customer service.

I bought a T-Shirt the other day but it kept giving me static electric shocks every time I tried to wear it.

I took it back to the store and they kindly replaced it with another one free of charge.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PringyUK
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2020
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Too much Dadjoke reading has gotten me to this point...

My FiancΓ© was heading to bed while I was wrapping up some work. As she leans in to kiss me good night a static shock jumped from her lips to mine.

Without missing a beat I say, "I always knew there was a spark between us."

I blame all of you for making me think this way.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/superswan
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2014
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The pun gods smiled upon me today.

My friend got a static shock, and in the span of 5 minutes I rattled off these:

  • Geez, that's shocking news.

  • How are you current-ly feeling?

  • Don't give me that look. I'm just trying to energize you.

  • Looks like I gotta amp up my jokes.

  • I'm gonna hit you with a battery of jokes until you laugh.

  • Don't let your sense of humor be so static.

  • This isn't a crime, you can't charge me with anything.

  • Wire you so upset?

  • Do you want me to plug the stream of jokes?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/phraps
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2016
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Told my Gf that she should work for a train company.

She keeps getting statically shocked. So I told her she should work for a train company since she is such a great conductor.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/noxesy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2017
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It's electric!

My husband has a bad back and ended up in the ER today from the pain. I came to get him and was wheeling him down the hallway when I stepped on a metal floor divider. I got a nasty static shock on my foot and hand pushing the wheelchair from completing the circuit.

My husband says "oh! I didn't know you were that in to music"

Me: ".......?"

Him: "You're such a great conductor!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ashleyrah
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2014
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The sweater I got for Christmas was picking up static electricity. So I went to the store to return it.

They gave me another one. Free of charge.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2019
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