My wife got mad at me because I wouldnβt stop singing βIβm a Believerβ by the Monkees. At first, I thought she was kidding.
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︎ Apr 02 2021
My Wife said she would leave me if I didnβt stop singing songs by the Monkees, I thought she was joking
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︎ Apr 12 2021
I can't stop singing Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin songs...
I think I've got the crooner virus.
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︎ Apr 07 2021
Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth.
Then it becomes a soap opera.
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︎ Mar 26 2021
A blonde goes into a church and asks the minister, "How much does it cost to rent a church singing group?"He said,"Do you mean a choir?"
She said "Fine... How much does it cost to acquire a church singing group?"
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︎ Dec 05 2020
Bilbo Baggins suddenly wakes up and hears someone singing βDonβt stop Believingβ.
It was an unexpected Journey.
π︎ 13k
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︎ Oct 18 2020
I thought I heard an onion singing a Bee Gees song.
But it was just a chive talking.
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︎ Mar 25 2021
what do you call singing computer
π︎ 40
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︎ Feb 12 2021
My sister asked me to stop singing βWonderwallβ
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︎ Dec 22 2020
I thought I heard the Bee Gees singing in my herb garden...
But it was just the chives talkin'
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︎ Feb 17 2021
In our next Dnd campaign, the 4 heroes are all going to be singing wizards.
A regular bard-ershop quartet.
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︎ Dec 31 2020
Did you hear that they're replacing two letters of the alphabet? Instead of T, you have to say "Clowns". Instead of V, you need to say "Jokers". I refuse to use them, but I was singing the alphabet when they changed them, so I have a problem...
Clowns to the left of me, Jokers to the right, here I am, stuck in the middle with U.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
I made a joke about the song Staying Alive and how it sounds like women singing. Apparently many of you didnβt like it.
Hereby my sincere apolobeegies!
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︎ Nov 11 2020
Me: "How do I get one of those singing groups?"
Director: "you mean a choir?"
Me: exasperated sigh yes, fine. How do aquire one of those singing groups?
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︎ Oct 06 2020
I was walking around this aquarium the other day. When I heard these 2 fish singing....
I think it was Pike and Tina Tuna.
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︎ Nov 10 2020
I came so close to singing "the lion sleeps tonight"
I was only a whim away, a whim away, a whim away, a whim away
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︎ Oct 11 2020
My 3yo is in a phase where he makes up words a lot, and today I heard him singing "Crotch-ohs, crotch-ohs" over and over. I told my wife, "That sounds like the worst breakfast cereal ever..."
"But at least it's made with whole groins."
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︎ Oct 12 2020
My son kept singing the first line to the Spider-Man song over and over. So we took him to the doctor who gave us the bad news:
Our son was trapped in the spider-verse.
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︎ Sep 24 2020
Why hasnβt Activia yogurt made a commercial with Jamie Lee Curtis singing a parody of Alanis Morissetteβs βIronicβ and change it to βProbioticβ?
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︎ Aug 23 2020
Went to the Police Station yesterday and started singing Rock a bye baby.
The Sargent stopped me and said, "No sir, we need an alibi."
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︎ Oct 07 2020
So my wife and I were singing the song βThe farmer in the dellβ to our daughter. My wife looks at me and asks βWhatβs a dell?β
To which I responded: a British pop singer
Then came the eye roll
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︎ Sep 05 2020
Which brand of computer has the best singing voice?
π︎ 14
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︎ Jul 16 2020
How to stop a cringey youtuber from singing?
π︎ 5
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︎ Jul 20 2020
They're singing off key
π︎ 25
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︎ May 27 2020
12 year old daughter singing her revised version of βCreepβ by Radiohead...
βIβm a creek. Iβm a riverrrrrrrr.β
π︎ 9
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︎ Jun 28 2020
I got kicked out of karaoke after singing βDanger Zoneβ nine times in a row.
Too many Loggins attempts.
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︎ Dec 21 2019
My wife said she would kill me if I kept singing "I'm a Believer". I called her bluff and kept at it.
π︎ 162
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︎ Dec 10 2019
I didn't know the local railroad workers were good at singing
But I heard they were recently working on a new track
π︎ 100
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︎ Jan 17 2020
What do you call singing cash
π︎ 9
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︎ May 03 2020
So I was singing All Star in the car the other day, and my friend asked βHow do you know all the wordsβ so I swiftly replied:
βSomebody once told meβ
π︎ 1k
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︎ Feb 04 2019
I can't stop singing Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra songs.
I think I have croonervirus
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︎ Apr 01 2021
Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth
Then it becomes a soap opera
π︎ 27
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︎ Jan 20 2021
What is it called when your singing in the shower and shampoo gets in your mouth?
π︎ 32
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︎ Jan 17 2021
Someone asked me if I would ever stop singing Wonderwall
π︎ 125
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︎ Nov 25 2020
My wife asked me to stop singing "Wonderwall" to her
π︎ 6
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︎ Dec 10 2020
I went into a church and asked the minister how much it would cost to rent a church singing group.
He asked, "do you mean a choir?"
I said, "OK, fine, then how much does it cost to acquire a church singing group?"
π︎ 7
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︎ Dec 05 2020
What do you call a singing computer?
π︎ 8
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︎ Nov 25 2020
My wife asked me to stop singing βWonderwallβ to her.
π︎ 311
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︎ Apr 20 2020
My mom told me to stop singing "Im a Believer" because it was annoying.
At first I though she was kidding...Then I saw her face
π︎ 42
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︎ May 30 2020
My friend told me to stop singing Iβm a believer and I thought she was joking
π︎ 10
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︎ May 20 2020
My wife told me to stop singing Wonderwall
π︎ 113
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︎ Mar 07 2020
I thought my wife was joking when she said she'd leave me if I didn't stop singing βI'm a Believerβ..
π︎ 37
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︎ Apr 01 2020
My friend asked me to stop singing Wonderwall
π︎ 36
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︎ May 27 2020
My wife told me to stop singing "I'm A Believer" or she'd kill me. I thought she was kidding.
π︎ 3k
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︎ Feb 06 2019
I thought my wife was joking when she said she'd leave me if I didn't stop singing "I'm a Believer."
π︎ 81
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︎ Mar 06 2020
My wife told me to stop singing Iβm a believer by the monkees, I thought she was joking
π︎ 85
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︎ Jan 15 2020
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