Sit back for an interesting story
Got myself Empire Engineer Mod and started my Empire Run as Karl Franz. Nothing unusual happened at first, cleared my starting enemies when something interesting happened. I received Death Wizard from quest, not my usual pick but okay. This Wizard ended up saving my campaign in the early game.
After clearing Skarsnik i started to get lucky and recieve some good items, mainly ones centered about debuffing enemy troops. With my fort at lvl 3 i felt safe to go and deal with Vampires and Drycha. Against my luck Orcs to the north managed to defeat Boris so i had to go and save him. After few turns his province was reunited to him and Boris became a nice trading partner of mine.
As my luck went up a bit so did my bad luck. Skullsmasherz somehow called in Karak-We-Stomped-Kimler-And-Took- Blackstone against me. I managed to hold of first wave of orcs and dwarves but Karak-We-Stomped-Kimler-And-Took- Blackstone then pulled in Paravon against me. So rushing to the south here is where my Death Wizard shined
Every fight i had this Wizard managed to reduce enemy army stats to 0 with spells combined with Karl's items i recieved earlier. It allowed me to fight a battle after battle without stopping or needing to replenish. Soon i razed Karak-We-Stomped-Kimler-And-Took- Blackstone and Paravon to ashes. Other Bretonnian lords occupied their lands and declared war of Skullsmasherz.
Because i had to deal with south and north first Manfred conquered a good chunk of Ostermark, Averland, Talabecland and Stirland. I rushed to relieve Stirland capitol of the siege when i noticed that Talabecland also had his capitol sieged. That's when i saw him, fucking Boris with his province secured by me turned to fight Manfred and his army relieve the siege of Talabecland capitol. I was overjoyed.
I moved my forces into Ostermark to clear Manfred and invading Azhag. After securing Ostermark in 3 turns i noticed Averlands capitol is under siege by Vlad. As i went to move Karl south Gelt declared war on Vlad and defeated his army saving Averland's capitol. I couldn't believe it, electors were actually helping me.
Manfred pulled in Skaven against us and Azhag pulled in Drycha. Luckily Boris, Gelt, Me ( Karl ), Ostermark and Averland fragments together with Talabecland fought a bloody yet good campaign and we won! With Sylvania under our control and Manfred defeated i made my way to my capitol to upgrade my army.
When i disbanded my troops i pr
... keep reading on reddit ➡Phil
Sudden Lee
Go post NSFW jokes somewhere else. If I can't tell my kids this joke, then it is not a DAD JOKE.
If you feel it's appropriate to share NSFW jokes with your kids, that's on you. But a real, true dad joke should work for anyone's kid.
Mods... If you exist... Please, stop this madness. Rule #6 should simply not allow NSFW or (wtf) NSFL tags. Also, remember that MINORS browse this subreddit too? Why put that in rule #6, then allow NSFW???
Please consider changing rule #6. I love this sub, but the recent influx of NSFW tagged posts that get all the upvotes, just seem wrong when there are good solid DAD jokes being overlooked because of them.
Thank you,
A Dad.
So far nobody has given me a straight answer
Well, toucan play at that game.
Windows
Martin Freeman, and Andy Serkis.
They also play roles in Lord of the Rings.
I guess that makes them the Tolkien white guys.
She said apple-lutely
..... Will get a reward.
'Eye-do'
This is my first post pls don't kill me lol.
The people in the comment section is why I love this subreddit!!
Cred once again my sis wants credit lol
Keep in mind, my son is 4 years old, so everything is an original to him.
I had to work late into the evening yesterday, and he was just going to bed when I got home. I had left home for the office nearly 14 hours prior, had a long day, lots of meetings, traffic, etc.
When I walked through the door, I was exhausted, run down, and starving. My wife hugged me and asked how my day was, and I replied, "Done. It was a good day, but has got me exhausted. I just want to grab a bite and go to bed. I'm hungry."
From my son's bedroom, I hear him shout, "Hi Hungry! Nice to meet you!"
Not only did it make me laugh, but I completely forgot about how hungry and tired I was. I went to his bedroom, and we laughed together about it. It was exactly what I needed.
Edit: Thanks for all the awards, kind strangers! I'll let my son know y'all enjoyed his joke too!
I heard parents named their children lance a lot.
First post please don't kill me
Edit: i went to sleep and now my inbox is dead, thank you kind strangers for the awards!
Japan.
"No, the regular kind!" I laughed.
second hand stores!
it's Hans free now..
Old Neeeeiiiiighvy
10+10 is twenty and 11+11 is twenty too
A buck-an-ear!
I Thank ye kind Matey for the booty! I be truly overwhelmed! Thank you!
Holy cow! Thank you everyone for the upvotes and awards! I wasn’t expecting this!
He should have a good vowel movement. His next diaper change could spell disaster though.
and not:
Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
That was the punchline
It’s for Hispanic attacks
Feyonce
Without missing a beat he asks "Daddy, do you know how much room you need to grow Fungi like that?"
I did not know.
So he tells me "as Mushroom as possible!"
So proud.
He was so brave and even tried to encourage us, the family around him, with his last breaths. He kept whispering to us to Be Positive.
He said, “Change the batteries in your hearing aid”.
