I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it failed miserably.
Good players are hard to find.
π︎ 248
π
︎ Feb 06 2021
Why don't professional boxers have sex before a fight ?
Thy probably don't like each other.
π︎ 123
π
︎ Jan 19 2021
I have never actually used a professional telescope in my life.
Itβs something Iβm thinking of looking into.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Dec 29 2020
What's a professional and experienced drug overlord is called ?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 28 2021
What do positively charged particles have in common with professional sumo wrestling teams?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Jan 21 2021
Iβve considered becoming a professional horse groomer.
π︎ 15
π
︎ Dec 18 2020
I became a professional fisherman...
But discovered that I couldn't live on my net income.
π︎ 65
π
︎ Nov 13 2020
Professional librarian.
π︎ 68
π
︎ Oct 24 2020
Why do referees in professional rugby always give penalties against chickens?
Because they always award against professional fowls.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
Professional procrastinator
π︎ 10
π
︎ Nov 09 2020
Why do some types of healthcare professionals only care about themselves?
Because they're nurse assists.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 22 2020
Working in Produce the last few years has made me realize I'm a professional musician...
I work with beet boxes and I wrap!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
Amazon delivered my new Ninja professional blender yesterday but I can't tell if I like or not though...
It keeps giving me mixed results.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Nov 05 2020
My dream of becoming the first professional boxer/pirate were crushed....
The boxing commission said my right hook was illegal.
π︎ 35
π
︎ Oct 26 2020
What do you call medical professionals who don't feed their patients after an overnight stay in the hospital?
Doctors without boarders.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 04 2020
My friend is a professional skydiver.
He really throws himself into his work.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Oct 10 2020
My wife, Ming, told me, "You would look more professional without that funny bow tie." I have to wear it though. I explained to her, "My jokes aren't funny without...
π︎ 8
π
︎ Sep 22 2020
The guy who did my urinalysis made way too many jokes to be a professional
It was a complete pisstake
π︎ 12
π
︎ Sep 09 2020
Did you hear about the professional bowler who was also a gymnast?
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 21 2020
My dog decided to become a professional at barking
I think I'll get him a subwoofer
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
My friend is a medical professional who does circumcisions for a living.
He doesn't get paid much, but at least he gets to keep all the tips.
π︎ 26
π
︎ Jun 11 2020
Ordering pizza with my 3 year old.
Me: do you want ranch or blue cheese?
3yr old: ranch is for horses
Little guy Caught me off guard lol
π︎ 43
π
︎ Jan 04 2021
Hats off to all the doctors and health care professionals
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jun 10 2020
Whatβs the Highest Level of Competition That a Semi Professional Sauerkraut Pickler Aspires To?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 11 2020
Three men were onboard a ship playing dice on deck when the oldest man angrily jumped off the front of the boat. The younger man said..
You keeled my father. Prepare two die.
*I sent this to my brother and he replies: Was his name Inyougo?
^(What a freaking professional)
π︎ 63
π
︎ Jan 05 2021
Security professionals advise to never use βbeef stewβ as a password
π︎ 418
π
︎ Feb 03 2020
I was going to make a joke about a professional Boxer
But he blocked my punch line
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 16 2020
I hope it does
π︎ 748
π
︎ Sep 01 2020
I once got my toe nails professionally trimmed. They used a hardened steel tool for smoothing my clipped nails...
In other words, a pedi-file.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jun 30 2020
My wife dated a professional clown before we started going out.
I had some big shoes to fill.
π︎ 57
π
︎ Apr 23 2020
How much money do professional ice skaters make in a year?
Eight figures but unfortunately they can't access it because their accounts are frozen.
π︎ 19
π
︎ Mar 26 2020
Brain freeze
My dad is a health care professional and recently had a patient that has been βhuffing Freon for the past 18 years.β His response?
βI wonder if he gets really bad brain freeze.β
π︎ 8
π
︎ Feb 06 2021
Steve Tyler has quit the music business and become a professional fletcher...
His shop is called Arrowsmith.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 22 2020
Whatβs the one thing professional poker players and plumbers can agree on?
A royal flush is better than a full house
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 25 2020
What do you call a medical professional who has lost it way?
π︎ 2
π
︎ May 02 2020
Did you hear about the professional skier who started to use performance enhancing drugs?
He went downhill real fast.
π︎ 31
π
︎ Nov 14 2019
I once tried to be a professional juggler
I had to quit, there was just too much up in the air at the time
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 10 2020
My friend was a professional opera soloist...
It was her aria of expertise.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jan 09 2020
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete failure.
Good players are hard to find.
π︎ 17k
π
︎ Oct 05 2020
It would be impossible to host a professional hide n seek tournament
Since good players are hard to find
π︎ 21
π
︎ Nov 15 2020
I dreamed of becoming a professional fisherman
But I found out that I couldn't live on my net income
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 28 2020
Why is organizing a professional hide-and-seek tournament hard?
It's hard to find good players.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 15 2020
Working in Produce the last few years has made me realize I'm a professional musician...
I work with beet boxes and I wrap!
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 13 2020
I tried to organize a professional Hide and Seek tournament, but it was a complete disaster.
Good players are hard to find.
π︎ 11
π
︎ Aug 21 2020
I used to be a professional fisherman
Then discovered I couldn't live on my net income
π︎ 15
π
︎ Sep 30 2019
My idea of a professional Hide and Seek tournament failed miserably.
Good players are hard to find.
π︎ 48
π
︎ Feb 22 2020
My wife dated a professional clown before she met me.
I had some pretty big shoes to fill.
π︎ 122
π
︎ Aug 10 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.