What do you call a polar bear living in Florida?

A solar bear

Bonus: what do you call a bear that practices dentistry?

A molar bear

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πŸ‘€︎ u/westsoutheast
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
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Polar bears have been introduced in the Antarctic. What are these polar bears now called?

Polar opposite bears

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πŸ‘€︎ u/everflow
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2021
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I hate being bi polar...

It's awesome.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
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What’s the best way to trap a polar bear?

First drill a hole in the ice and line it with green peas. When the polar bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the icehole!

(Told to me by my dad at dinner this evening)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/megsie72
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
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How did the polar bear catch a penguin?

Because it was bipolar...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/twozon
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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I'm going on a quiz show! There are lots of other contestants, but they're all grizzlies and polars. It's called...

Who wants to beat a million bears.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlRedux
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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What does a polar bear eat

An ice burger

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shoto798
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
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Why are pictures of Polar Bears always so powerful?

Because they're on polar roids.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chadsreal
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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What did the polar bear eat after the dentist fixed his tooth?

The dentist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EcksMarksDespot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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The political climate is so polarizing these days that even Do, Re and Mi decided to form their own independent left leaning musical scale and vote Democratic.

When questioned they just stated they were now Anti Fa.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BLT5000
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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A polar bear walked into a bar.

β€œA rum and...................... coke please." He asked.

"Certainly", replied the bar man, "but why the big pause?"

"I was born with them", answered the bear.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Donorob
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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I went on a date last night with a girl from the zoo

It was great. She’s a keeper.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2020
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What do you call a polar bear that faces North and a polar bear that faces South?

Polar Opposites.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xoriatis71
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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The polar bear was acting weird at the zoo

i think it's bipolar

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2020
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How to Catch a Polar Bear: 1)Find a frozen lake 2)Dig a hole in the ice 3)Surround the hole with frozen peas 4)Hide nearby.

When the bear stops to take a pea, kick it in the ice hole!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/banditk77
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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Why do polar bears live only in the north pole?

Because if it also lived in the south pole it would be bipolar

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πŸ‘€︎ u/invisible_being
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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Polar bears are known be extremely moody and sometimes even mate with their own gender.

Thus truly making them bipolar

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ssigea
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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Where does a polar bear keep his money?

In a snowbank.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fabulousump
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
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What is the name of the polar bear therapist living at the north pole?

Dr. Sanity Claws

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Foamy07
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
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What do you call a polar bear on roller skates?

A roller bear!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/powerninja101
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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As my wife gazes at our son, I realise we are polar opposites ...

She's thinking: I want another boy...

And I'm thinking: Boy, you want another...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
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Ever heard of the polar bear that lives on both north & south poles, is manic depressive and attracted to both sexes?

Hes known as the bi-polar bi-polar bi polar bear.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2020
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What’s white and annoying at breakfast?

An avalanche

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JeepinHunter
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2021
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How much does a polar bear weigh?

A lot

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LazerCr0w
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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People act like the North and South poles are exactly the same

...but really, there’s a whole world of differences between them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrindoc
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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Which bear is the most condescending?

A pan-duh!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVIIVVI
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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Grizzly bear walks into a bar. Says to the bartender "i'll have a whiskey..................on the rocks, please" bartender asks "whats with the big pause?"

Grizzly looks perplexed and replies "Ive had them all my life"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Carr3iroh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
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Batteries have split personalities

On the one side, they are positive, while on the other, they are negative

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeaconOnAChairMC
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2020
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You may find this fact polarizing...
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WTF_is_OT
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
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Polar express
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πŸ‘€︎ u/emo_rat_
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
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A bear goes to the bar and says "can I get one whiskey..................and one coke"

The bartender asked "why the big pause"

The bear replies "I was born with them"

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KillRespectively1
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
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A polar bear and his son are sitting on the ice

The son looks up at his dad and says, "Hey, dad? Am I a 100% polar bear?"

The dad says, "Yes, son."

A few minutes go by and the son again asks, "You sure? Like all the way?"

The dad gets annoyed and says, "Yes, 100%. Your mothers a polar bear, I'm a polar bear, so you're a polar bear. Why do you keep asking?!"

The son responds, "Cause I'm frickin freezing!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/byebyefetus
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2020
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What did god say to the polar bears when they told him they hate spring and summer?

Well, they can't all be winters.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LinexGuy88
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
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What's the angriest country in the world?

Madagascar!

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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I have bi-polar disorder...

... But all things considered I'm actually doing quite well half the time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trollcitybandit
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
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The twelve days of Jokemas, day seven

What is Tom Hanks' favorite drink?

The Polar Expresso

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hud_is_on
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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What do you call a bacterial disease caused by two grizzlies ?

Twobearculousis

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2020
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Why couldn't the polar bear take his vitamins?

Because the seal was broken.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WinterWolf041
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
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How much does a fit polar bear weigh?

Enough to break the ice.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GrenadeLawyer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2019
🚨︎ report
To catch a polar bear you surround a hole in the ice with peas

Then, when he goes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JosephsMythJr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you catch a polar bear?

You cut a hole in the ice and place a pea at the edge of the hole. Then you hide. When the polar bear stops to take a pea you kick it in the ice hole.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trusti360
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
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How do you catch a polar bear?

First, you drill a hole in the ice then line it with peas. When the bear comes to take a pee, you kick him in the ice hole.

(My daughter's joke actually)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DeadpoolOptimus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
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How Do You Catch A Polar Bear?

You cut a hole in the ice and line it with peas. When the bear goes out to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/redditonaprayer
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2020
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I hate being bi polar.

It’s awesome.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sh4d0wfr34k94
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
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Do you know how to catch a polar bear?

You start by cutting a hole in the ice. Then put peas all around it. When a bear walks up to take a pea, you kick it in the ice hole.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
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