A peasant's wife told him to go get milk for the baby. Dutifully, he went to the market with the baby and brought home a hefty jug of milk. "You've forgotten the baby!" she exclaimed.

"No I haven't... I got milk for the baby!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Catillionaire
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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What's a peasant's favorite form of entertainment?

Family feudalism

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotA_Drug_Dealer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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Bow down to your master, peasants
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πŸ‘€︎ u/edmund22lee
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
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What does the peasant duck say to the king duck?

β€œMa’llard”

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trageduck
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
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What did the peasants say to a noble who let them suffer?

You fucking count

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wadedoto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
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What do you call a peasant and their fief?

surf and turf

BONUS: What do you call a sick roman emperor?

...

Julius Sneezer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/artsykittii
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
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Those damn peasants imgur.com/Ik8dbKN
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spahn711
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2014
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What did the king say to his revolting peasants?

Your situation is feudal

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jamrod0
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
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Why did the king vomit when he discovered the peasants were rioting?

Because he found them revolting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RegalGreyOx
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2018
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Did you hear about the peasants in the 14th century?

Their actions were revolting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sortient
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17 2017
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Why didnt the escaped peasant want to go to the beach

he didnt want to go serfing again

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrdazed
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2014
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A buddy of mine named his dog β€œ5 Miles” so he could tell people he walked 5 miles

But today he ran over 5 Miles

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GigaMike123
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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Ole King cole

Let us not forget on this day in 1485 King Cole (of nursery rhyme fame) made a decree about farming. It seems that the peasants had used too much farmland for cabbages and there was not many other vegetables. The farmers soon got in all their cabbage crops, and had a great abundance. They found if they sliced and shredded the cabbage it took up less space to store. This decree is now known as "Coles law".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2018
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[Long] The king and queen of Fruitlandia had a son named Melon.

One day, Melon met a girl named Cantaloupe. She was very sweet to him. They fell in love quickly, but his father didn’t approve because she was a peasant. You see, the king wanted Melon to marry the princess of Veggieland, Broccoli. The king banned Melon and Cantaloupe from seeing each other ever again.

However, the young lovers were determined to see each other. Every Sunday, Cantaloupe snuck into Melon’s room. They would stay up till midnight with each other. This went on for many years.

Meanwhile, the king was arranging Melon’s marriage with Broccoli. He was prepared to pay every expense to make the wedding excellent for PR. However, the night before Melon was to be married, the king found out about his meeting with Cantaloupe! He made Melon swear a Royal Oathβ€”an unbreakable promiseβ€”to marry Broccoli the next day and never see Cantaloupe again after that.

That night, when Cantaloupe visited, Melon admitted what had happened. She begged him to run off with her and get married, but he refused.

β€œI love you, but I swore a Royal Oath. I’m sorry, dear, but I Cantaloupe.”

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2018
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What do feudal lords get for Jesus' birthday?

Christmas peasants.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VileButtFace
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2017
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Every phone call on a weekday.

Call Dad

Dad: Hey. What's up?

Me: Not much. Just got out of class.

Dad: You peasant. You have no class.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fluffmanzadah
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2014
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My Western Civ teacher pulled out this one

We were talking about a peasant revolution in the 1800's in Sicily.

Classmate: So, why were the peasants revolting?

Teacher: Well that's a mean thing to say.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wherewasmybrain
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2014
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