My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm, and by mistake I gave her a tube of Super Glue.
It’s been a week now and she’s still not talking to me.
An architect designed a bridge but he made a massive mistake.
They made a mistake on the statue of Lincoln.
It was a monumental error
Imagine a form of public transportation where there is no monetary fee but you relive past mistakes for as long as you are a passenger
I packed my tent but there was a mistake
A pirate wanted to celebrate his captain’s birthday, so he bought a large quantity of balloons while ashore. Back on the ship, he walked over to hand the balloons to the captain, but he tripped and most of them floated away. The captain said, “Arrr! That was a costly mistake...”
“We lost a lot of doubloons.”
I told my wife to embrace her mistakes...
I asked my dad if he ever learns from his mistakes
"Sure", he said, "I got a vasectomy the day after you were born".
I almost made a huge mistake applying to Rice University.
I'm really a meat and potatoes kind of guy.
I think it was a mistake to call childbirth “delivery”.
It should have been called takeout instead.
What are Astronauts doing when they do a mistake?
I often make mistakes telling Dad jokes.
When people misspell barely like barley, they’re not making a mistake
They’re just going against the grain
LPT: If you don't want to buy sandwiches to your co-workers, just buy them with mistakes: Other kind of bread, other size...
A man that makes a mistake in an elevator,
Putting up the wrong headstone is a grave mistake
Epitaphs never written:
I never thought I'd live to see this day come
Here lies a great photographer, he died from overexposure
She wrote a best selling book
- Paige Turner
Here lies Claire Voyant
She never saw it coming...
Wich dentist makes the most mistakes
Dolphins never make mistakes
Everything they do is on porpoise
I was always told to we should celebrate our mistakes
I guess that's why my mum throws me a birthday party every year
I told my son people keep accidentally pleading for me to purchase meat for them. He asked, “By mistake?”
I shouted, “Oh come on! Not you too!”
I made the mistake of telling my suitcase that we won’t be going anywhere this year because of the pandemic.
I’m having to put up with a lot of emotional baggage ever since.
I made a grave mistake
But I was able to dig myself out of it
My name is Tyler. Yesterday I got an email addressed to “Yler”. I pity the fool who makes a mistake like that.
It is a grave mistake to go to your own funeral.
It takes a big man to admit his mistakes
But it takes an even bigger man to give a giraffe a haircut.
Do you know how I embrace my mistakes?
I hug my wife and children
I stole my friends goose by mistake
He told me to come over take a gander.
Someone else made the gravy mistake of posting that photo
Decided to have a curry for dinner the other night, that was a mistake...
Spent all night vindaloo.
I rarely care about spelling mistakes online
I'm just not that typo guy!
If spelling mistakes are made, puns shall be too
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes...
And then she gave me a huge hug.
The animal trainers at SeaWorld have made some mistakes
But when they work with dolphins they do it on porpoise
Paul Bro 1 makes another grave mistake (2019)
I made the mistake of drinking the liquid from a scientist’s test tube.
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes...
I made the mistake of telling my suitcase that we won’t be going away this year because of the pandemic...
I’m having to deal with a lot of emotional baggage.
I think it was a mistake to call childbirth “delivery”.
It should have been called “takeout” instead.
I told my son people keep accidentally pleading for me to purchase meat for them. He asked, “By mistake?”
I shouted, “Oh come on! Not you too!”
It takes a big man to admit his mistake.
But it takes a bigger man to give a giraffe a haircut.
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