This is a masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMirsinho
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
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My masterpiece! (Answer/pun in comments)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CocozuBR
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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Masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AmanBlanco
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2020
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My Masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MGyver
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
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How does a painter display his masterpiece?

Easely.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
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A real masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/williehero
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2019
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Truly a masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thotpatrol65
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
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I am done with life I have made my masterpiece
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tragedymanga
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2017
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I once knew a guy who could make masterpiece artworks using only steaks.

It was a rare medium well done.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dgrubbnasty
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2018
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A Modern Art Masterpiece.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2018
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My friend’s idea of a β€˜masterpiece’
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ibeatobesity
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24 2018
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For some reason, my family didn't appreciate my masterpiece.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/alfwight
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2013
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An unbridled masterpiece of a horse pun to one of my students this morning. It's a long setup, but dads will appreciate it. This one really happened as written.

So, I'm a Spanish professor, and I gave a final exam this morning. One of the last parts was that students had to write a paragraph using reflexive verbs in which they describe their daily routine. Since the class only had nine students in it, I told them that if they wanted to wait, I would grade their exams for them and tell them their class grade.

It was an open-book final exam (11 pages long), so I was in my office, and a graduating senior finished first and gave me her exam. When I got to her paragraph, I saw that she had written in Spanish that every day she woke up, got up, took a shower, got dressed, brushed her teeth, ate breakfast, and then she and her friend Emmy went horseback riding. Now, I knew that she didn't go horseback riding, ever, but that it was vocabulary from the previous chapter. The following conversation ensued:

Me: Horseback riding? Really?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every day?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every single day?
Her: SΓ­, SeΓ±or.
Me: I guess you could call it a stable routine then.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wuapinmon
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2018
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I was in a meeting at work this afternoon and heard this masterpiece

Older gentleman: I'm running out of patience in my old age

Guy on the other end of the table: Well it's a good thing you're not a doctor

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mpflug7
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2017
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one of my dad's masterpieces

a big joke hits a weak joke

he then looks at me with a about-to-burst-out-laughing look in his face

...what a bad joke

needless to say i couldn't keep it together

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tostadoras
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2013
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Thought this group might like to submit some of their masterpieces to VIZIO's new "Dadisms" campaign.

http://viziodadisms.com/
I post this now in the hopes that hilarity could be the byproduct

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πŸ‘€︎ u/minuteman_d
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2016
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Caught me off guard with this masterpiece

Leaving a family dinner with Dad.

"Are you sure you're going? The night is still young".

"Must have been a Squire".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cosmo780
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2013
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After 11 months I created a Dad Joke Masterpiece

The lady, son, and I were in a retail store the other day when an annoucement was made over the PA system.

"Customer needs assistance in the vacuum cleaners"

I lean towards the wife and say, "Well this Hoover sucks. Oh, the Dyson it also sucks. To be honest, they all suck."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazeeeastcracker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2014
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Have you heard the old chicken song?

It was written by Bach Bach.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Gdawgst
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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My friend from high school became an engineer or something.

He would design vehicles and stuff like no other.

One day he called me and said he had a very special design planned for his next vehicle.

So I asked him: "What's the big design you're working on?"

He said: "Its a secret. You'll find out later."

A few months later, he sends me a picture of this amazing motorbike that's entirely made of wood and nothing else. I called him back and told him I really liked it and if I could ride it.

He replied in a deep and depressing voice: "You can't I'm sorry. I threw it away."

I asked him why he threw away such a masterpiece he worked so hard to make.

He replied: "I tried everything..... But it just wooden start!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_joshi_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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In the word Laughter, the letter L comes first

the rest of the letters come aughter it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/man_nowhere
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2019
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What did the tutor call the 4th year art student's work?

A masterpiece

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ExterminatorRex
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
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There's a little known country in central Europe that is ruled by a monarchy...

Not many people are aware of its existence but I assure that it is there all the same. The king of this little land faces a lot of difficulty. He wants to make his kingdom into a sovereign nation but unfortunately they do not have the infrastructure, population, or economy to do so. In fact, this small state is only known for a single export. Thanks to their proximity to some of the finest gold and other metals in the world but total lack of an ability to process those metals on a mass scale, they have been left with only one option. You know the saying; when life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Make lemonade they did. This tiny territory is renowned for creating the highest quality watches in the world. No expense is spared and their elite group of craftsmen train for their entire lives from childhood to produce these terrific timepieces. Men of great wealth and taste have been known to trade entire fortunes for just a single one of these watches; that is how valuable they are.

The king knows this and he knows that only a small portion of his populace can ever hope to become one of the respected elite, let alone hold one of their masterpieces in their own hands. Being a very just and fair man, the king ordered the most senior watchmaker in the land to create something the likes of which had never been seen. A watch of such great craftsmanship so as to be above monetary value. The man labored long and hard for many nights to produce the king's watch. When he at last presented the completed work to his lord - in front of the entire nation, no less - he was met with thunderous applause and a warm embrace. He had done it! The king then made a shocking announcement.

"This masterpiece belongs to my people!"

When the roaring of the crowd died down he continued.

"This watch shall be a symbol of my love for all of you. Though I rule over you with supreme authority I do not wish a single one of you to feel that you do not have a voice in the ruling of this nation. From this day on let anyone who doubts my decisions or questions my judgment wear this watch and stand as my equal to voice their concerns. Should even a single one of you think me unfair or wrong in any matter then simply come to my castle and I will present you this token of good faith."

The king made good on his word and from that day on all citizens knew they held the right to challenge their king's rulings. Over time the watch became a symbol of fairness throughout the land. Anyone who wore it

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2016
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Dad joke at the game.

I went with my dad to a college football game and we were sitting in section B row 21. The person behind us calmly says to someone next to us, there is a bee in you hair. Without hesitation and with a dead serious look on his face my dad turns around and says "well we are sitting in the B section"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElkHairCaddis
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2013
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For all you IT workers out there...

Heard this masterpiece today after a virus prompted all office users to shut down and prevent it from spreading:

The Trojans are coming! One of by LAN, two if by c:!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/defectiveburger
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2016
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Pablo Picasso was never called an ...

Did you hear about the aging artist who died while completing his masterpiece?

Yeah. It was a brush-stroke-of-genius

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breyersremorse
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2017
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Our waiter earned a nice tip..

I was visibly tired and struggling to even get through the menu when I asked for his suggestion.

Waiter: "Might I suggest the Filet Migyawn"

I returned with an immediate fist bump and thanked him for his masterpiece.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WayneWorld
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2016
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Bees

So my friend says they know someone with a brilliant sense of beauty. Like, they can spot masterpiece artwork from just a glance. Apparently they work at a bee apiary, and keep bees, so I have no idea how they came across this skill.

But I guess its true what they say. Beauty is in the eye of the bee holder.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GenericRamblings
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2016
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The Ultimate Dad Joke Duel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MepBeEpEQcM

Classics everywhere with an absolute masterpiece at the end.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dabork
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2015
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