Once I became a parent, I finally understood the . . .

scene where Yoda gets so tired of answering Luke's questions that he just dies.

πŸ‘︎ 165
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Quick reference for Star Wars: Chewie is short for Chewbacca, Ben Kenobi is short for Obi-Wan Kenobi...

...and Luke Skywalker is short for a storm trooper

πŸ‘︎ 319
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RKO-Cutter
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
🚨︎ report
When my son was born, I was struggling to come up with a name, so I asked a nurse for a cuppa tea...

When she got back, I asked how warm it is. She replied back with "Luke warm". And that is how earl gray got his name. (Not sure if this one is a dad joke)

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/peppapig34
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2021
🚨︎ report
Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there’s a long break in the ledge they can’t cross. β€œSomething for this I have.” Yoda says.

He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape.

He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yoda’s hovel, they find that some creature has chewed a hole in the fence around Yoda’s garden.

β€œSomething I have for this.” Yoda says again. Once again, he takes a bunch of forks out of his bag and, using duct tape, tapes them in to patch the hole.

Yoda and Luke return to Yoda’s home, where Yoda looks through his bag. He’s used all his forks but one, he discovers.

β€œThat’s ok Master." Luke says, wanting to be helpful. β€œI’ll write us a note reminding us to buy more.”

So he writes the note and uses the very last fork to pin it to the bulletin board.

He looks down at Yoda expecting pride, but instead finds a look of horror.

β€œMaster Yoda!” he asks. β€œWhat did I do wrong?”

Yoda replies sagely, β€œA Jedi uses the forks for no ledge and the fence. Never for a tack!”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Luke Skywalker: I know what Han is getting for Christmas.

Leia: How did you figure that out? Luke: I felt his presence.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CognitiveNerd1701
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
As dads, we love to spoil our kids...

So far, we've already told them that Vader was Luke's father and that Jon Snow didn't really die.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Poastash
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My 9-year-old son Luke was forgetting to use his cutlery again at dinner.

So in my best Obi-Wan Kenobi voice I said, "Luke, use the fork!"

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What's the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cysec
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you tell a Jedi-in-training that struggles to use chopsticks at a Chinese buffet?

Use the forks, Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AstrosAtoZ
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What did Han tell Luke about his dad?

Luke, I’m not your father, but your sister calls me daddy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DrGno1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Today I learned I will assume my final form and will he becoming a dad in December.

Probably name my kid Luke so I can remind him who I am for the rest of eternity.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/macbeezy_
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was Chewbacca suspicous when he hugged Princess Leya?

Because she was "Luke" warm

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scooterscuzz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Star Wars Joke: What is the temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm...

πŸ‘︎ 131
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/delasolis
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I’m a little confused by water temperature...

Who is Luke and why is he warm?

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pottrap
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 79
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend decided to get a tattoo of his favourite star wars character

You should have seen the Luke on her face

πŸ‘︎ 90
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/I_Got_A_Hatt
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Obi-Wan tell Luke when he started eating with his hands?

Use the fork Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sluskilusk
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?

Luke-warm

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/franz-hanz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the temperature inside a Tauntaun?

Luke-warm

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DoofyDeDoof
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
So, what did the Jedi master tell his Padawan before the big race?

Use the horse, Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDarkSoul616
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I saw Mark Hamill trying to get in a store by pulling a door marked Push.

He had a confused Luke on his face.

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Which jedi was famous for crossing streets?

Luke sidewalker

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bigboi2924
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
The award for the best dadjokes 2018 goes to...

… u/ebkbk for this post: Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian. made on 24.11. with 38.9k upvotes

[also already made by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes]

Let's move on to the top 3 of each month:

January:

  1. Is this sub still active? by u/I_Fart_Liquids on 01.01. with 36.4k upvotes

  2. Gonorrhea would have been a great name for diarrhea medicine by u/daugarten on 20.01. with 30.8k upvotes

  3. An open letter to the mods of r/dadjokes: by u/Alfie_13 on 27.01. with 18.9k upvotes

February:

  1. Was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm. by u/jakeisbill on 05.02. for 20.3k upvotes

  2. My daughter asked me what I'm posting on Reddit... by u/madazzahatter on 25.02. for 18.3k upvotes

  3. When a woman is giving birth, she is literally kidding. by u/ownworldman on 23.02. for 17.7k upvotes

March:

  1. I got an e-mail saying, "At Google Earth, we can read maps backwards!" and I thought... by u/madazzahatter on 21.03. for 22.2k upvotes

  2. Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. by u/Tface on 25.03. for 16.9k upvotes.

  3. [When I reach home, my 1.5 y.o. son rushes out to the gate to sit in my lap while I park the car. Then he just grabs the steering and starts shaking it with brrrmmm brrrmmm sound. His cute antics always make me forget that he's suffering from a rare disease.](https://www.reddit.com/r/da

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Skormes
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
🚨︎ report
This water isn't hot - it's the temperature of a Skywalker inside a tauntaun.

It's Luke warm.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/5007-574in3d
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2018
🚨︎ report
When Luke Skywalker was growing up, he sometimes forgot to use utensils while eating.

So, Owen and Beru had to say "Use the fork, Luke."

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gman314
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the highest temperature of Rey's Lightsaber?

Luke Warm.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JazzTheWolf
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2016
🚨︎ report
I'm really tempted to spruce up my car with a spoiler

Which one should I pick:

Snape kills Dumbledore or Luke, Darth Vader is your father or ???

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rubius0
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2014
🚨︎ report
Star Wars Puns

From movie puns we provide you the funniest collection of Star Wars puns

What do you call 5 siths piled on top of a lightsaber? A Sith-Kabob!


Why does Princess Leia keep her hair tied up in buns? So it doesn’t Hang Solow!


Why shouldn’t you ask Yoda for money? Because he’s always a little short


What program do Jedi use to view PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi


What do you call the website Chewbacca started that gives out Empire secrets? Wookieeleaks


What do you call a Jedi in denial? Obi-Wan Cannot Be


Where does Princess Leia go shopping for clothing? At the Darth Maul


Greg: Which Star Wars character travels around the world? Craig: Who? Greg: Globi-wan Kenobi!


Matthew: What does a Star Destroyer wear to a wedding? Daniel: What? Matthew: Bow ties, of course!


Deen Why was the droid angry? Mark: Why? Deen People kept pushing its buttons.


Luke: Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road? Lei Not sure. Luke: To get to the Dark Side.


Darth Vader: I know what you’re getting for Christmas. Luke: How do you know? Darth Vader: I can feel your presents.


What do Whipids say when they kiss? Ouch.


What is a jedi’s favorite toy? A yo-yoda


What do you call a pirate droid? Argh2-D2


Where does Jabba the Hutt eat? Pizza Hutt


What is Jabba the Hutt’s middle name? β€œThe” Why is Han Solo a loner? Because he’s solo.


What do you call a Mexican jedi? Obi-Juan Kenobi What do you call a Sith who won’t fight? A Sithy.


What time is it when Darth Vader steps on your chronometer? Time to get a new chronometer.


What do you call a pirate droid? Arrrrgh-2-D2


Which side of a wookie has the most hair? The outside.


Where does Jabba eat dinner? Pizza Hutt


Who do Jedi call to help open PDF files? Adobe Wan Kenobi


What do you call someone that tries to be a Jedi? Obi-Wannabe


What do you call a bounty hunter from Alabama? Bubba Fett


What time is it when Jabba the Hutt sits on your blaster? Time to get a new blaster! Why is Luke


Skywalker always invited on picnics? He always has the forks with him.


Which imperial officer hated Thanksgiving? Grand Moff Turkeyn


What do you call stormtroopers playing Monopoly? Game of Clones


Why did

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2017
🚨︎ report
My dad, the grammar nazi

Me: "Me, Matthew, Luke and John are going down the park"

Dad: "You mean Matthew, Luke, John and I are going down the park"

Me: "No dad, your not coming"

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NojWerdna
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2013
🚨︎ report
My friends 6 year old brother dad joked us today...

We were getting ready to leave for the gym when his little brother walks in wearing a Superman costume and yells, "I'M THE STRONGEST MAN ALIVE!!!!" My friend was annoyed with his brother and scoffed something about, "Luke you can't even bench the bar." Luke starts to giggle and said, "I bench you I can!"

πŸ‘︎ 222
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Madden12
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2014
🚨︎ report
When you try to pull a dad joke on your dad

.Dad to 1st brother - "Are you hungry?" .2nd brother - "No, he's luke" .Dad - "so where's hungry?" .2nd brother "He's over there" points at me .Dad - "No, it's over by Germany"

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/selwes13
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2017
🚨︎ report
The production staff of Car Talk at NPR
  • Accounts Payable Administrator_______________Imelda Czechs

  • Accounts Payable Clerk, Moscow Office__________Dasha Chekhov

  • Air-Quality Monitor _________________________Carmine Dioxide

  • Caffeine Addiction Counselor__________________Bruno Moore

  • Chief Legal Counsel_________________________ Hugh Louis Dewey of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe

  • Cliche Monitor_____________________________Saul Wellingood

  • Clothing Designer__________________________Hugh Jass

  • Credit Counselor___________________________Max Stout

  • Director of Purchasing_______________________Lois Bidder

  • Director of Pavlovian Research________________Isabelle Ringing

  • Divorce Attorney___________________________Carmine Nottyors

  • Dog Trainer_______________________________Don Chase Katz

  • Ebay Specialist____________________________Selma Junkoff

  • Head of Security___________________________Barb Dwyer

  • Global Economics Forecaster_________________Helena Handbasket

  • Marine Biologist___________________________Frieda Wales

  • Father-in-Law Liaison_______________________Royal Payne Diaz

  • Mother-in-Law Liaison______________________Stella Payne Diaz

  • Official Spokesperson_______________________Howie Vasive

  • Restroom Attendants_______________________Trudy Door & Donna Hall

  • Russian Chauffeur__________________________Picov Andropov

  • Scout Leader______________________________Lawson D. Woods

  • Shop Foreman_____________________________Luke Bizzy

  • Staff Intuitionist____________________________Ivan Inkling

  • Used Car Salesman_________________________Alexis Itznot

Full list can be found here: http://www.cartalk.com/content/staff-credits

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IcedPyro
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2016
🚨︎ report
Why is Darth Vader's helmet so phallic?

...because when they hid Luke & Leia from him, they removed his force kin.

πŸ‘︎ 56
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/spankleberry
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2016
🚨︎ report
Currently watching Empire Strikes Back

The scene is playing where Luke is hanging upside down and just managed to defeat the beast on Hoth by cutting off its arm.

Dad: Well you know why they call it a Wampa now.

Me: Why?

Dad: Because it only has one-paw.

Me: Uses Force Groan

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Con-the-old-bear
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2016
🚨︎ report
[xPost from r/StarWars] What is the internal temperature of a tauntuan?

Luke warm

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBeerded
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2014
🚨︎ report
My name is Luke

Every year and a half or so, when I'm least expecting it, my dad will tell me

> Luke, I am your father.

Thanks Dad.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lukemcr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2013
🚨︎ report
What did Obi-Wan say to Luke at the dinner table?

"Use the fork Luke"

πŸ‘︎ 59
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SwiftHadoken
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2018
🚨︎ report
Her Star Wars face tattoo..

So my friend decided to get a face tattoo of her favourite Star Wars character.

You should've seen the Luke on her face.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mudman1969
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Aunt Beru have to remind Luke at dinner?

Use your fork, Luke!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stubob
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Joefaux
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2018
🚨︎ report
What’s the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rotary_13b
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2018
🚨︎ report
What did Obi-wan say to Luke at the dinner table?

Use the forks, Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 223
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kapanee
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2015
🚨︎ report
Obi wan never told you who killed your father

Luke: he told me enough. I'm angry

Vader: Hi angry, I'm dad

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kinjago
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the internal temperature of a tauntaun?

Luke warm.

πŸ‘︎ 34
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CheeseheadDave
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2017
🚨︎ report
What's the inside temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm

πŸ‘︎ 60
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mastervahar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2015
🚨︎ report
TIL that my father named me Luke just so...

...he could say, "Luke, I am your father!" and laugh about it.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2017
🚨︎ report
I am your father!

He's only 4 months old but I can't wait to use this. My son's name is Luke.

πŸ‘︎ 46
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/miral13
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.