True story: So we were out today and sat at a table for some food. My 4yo asked what the holes and and notches were in the wood and my wife says βthey are knot holesβ.
Miss4 says βif they are not holes, what are they?β
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︎ Feb 06 2021
I did knot see that one coming!
π︎ 3k
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︎ Aug 25 2020
I didn't tie the knot till I was 38
I am hopeless with shoelaces.
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︎ Jan 14 2021
Rope walks into the bar. Bartender says, Sorry we donβt serve ropes here. Rope walks out, messes himself up, ties himself in a knot, and walks back into the bar. Bartender asked if heβs a rope!
Rope replies Iβm a frayed knot.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
What do you call a monkey caught in a knot?
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︎ Sep 26 2020
Where were knots invented?
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︎ Aug 08 2020
Knot finished with this format yet
π︎ 6k
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︎ Oct 11 2019
There couldn't be a tier list for knots because they would all be tied
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︎ Mar 28 2020
Y knot?
π︎ 76
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︎ Nov 02 2019
Do You know how to tie the knot in space?
I'm floating away very quickly.
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︎ Jun 12 2020
Im knot sure
π︎ 375
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︎ Feb 16 2019
Stare at this picture and watch me make this knot disappear.
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︎ Apr 11 2018
A friend of mine is a knot theorist and I told him a joke that wasnβt about knot theory.
He said heβs too old for not-knot jokes.
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︎ Jan 21 2020
I'm coming up with knot designs shaped like letters of the Alphabet.
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︎ Apr 22 2020
Could you knot?
π︎ 15
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︎ Oct 16 2019
Oh buoy. Knot again...
π︎ 3k
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︎ Aug 20 2017
not a perfect knot
π︎ 35
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︎ Aug 25 2019
Eye dew knot gnaw watt two dew
Eats too inn the mourning end eye veal lyke ass leap
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︎ Oct 10 2019
My colleague asked me if i was good at tying knots
I am married for the 3rd time, does that count?
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︎ Sep 16 2019
These ones must be taut what knot to do
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︎ Aug 12 2019
π︎ 405
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︎ Mar 06 2017
A rope walks into a bar & asks for a beer. The bartender says, βNo, youβre only a rope.β So he decides to disguise himself. He ties himself into a knot & ruffles his edges a bit. The next day, he walks into the bar & asks for a beer. The bartender says, βOf course... Wait, arenβt you that rope?β
And the rope replies, βIβm a frayed knot.β
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︎ Nov 12 2019
People are wondering whether I have any more of these bracelets - Iβm a frayed knot
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︎ Jun 13 2019
A bunch of knots were at a restaurant, but only one had dinner? Which one had dinner?
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︎ Dec 12 2019
My friend walks into my room and starts tying knots in my charging cable.
Without hesitating, I respond, "You know, that's knot in a cord with what most people call good manners."
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︎ Sep 15 2019
What do you call a Nazi who loves to tie knots and always says, "Nein!".
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︎ Oct 10 2019
My girlfriend asked if I could go a day without making a 'stupid' pun... frayed knot.
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︎ Jul 13 2017
'fraid knot
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︎ May 06 2017
I love knots.
π︎ 2
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︎ Sep 16 2019
Patient: Doctor, I swallowed some rope last night Doctor: Have you got it out of you system yet? Patient: I'm a frayed knot
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︎ Aug 04 2019
At a formal event, roll your tie up into a little bundle just below the knot.
Then ask someone, "which of the 2 flaps do you think will unravel first?"
After they guess, let in unravel and go, "Its a tie!"
...continue doing this to every single person you can in the room wearing a shit eating grin the whole time, until your wife pulls you aside and tells you it's time to leave (out of embarrassment and frustration).
now you get to go back home and do Dad stuff as you please!
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︎ Jul 15 2019
If you can twist a can into a knot,
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︎ Jun 15 2019
Knot again
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︎ Jul 02 2018
Knot on my watch!
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︎ Jul 13 2018
Special Report: Execution Botched Today Due to Hangman's Absence During Knot Tying Seminar in his Youth
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︎ Mar 18 2019
If one is an expert in tying knots,
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︎ Aug 25 2018
Knot.exe
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︎ Feb 27 2018
Knot to get your hopes up
π︎ 211
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︎ Aug 24 2014
Most pretzels are dough knots
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︎ Dec 04 2018
"I'm A Frayed Knot"
When People Tell Me That Joke, I Never Know What To Say. I'm Absolutely Tongue Tied. Which Is A Pity, Since It Takes Two To Tangle.
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︎ Jul 23 2017
Did you guys hear about the knot contest?
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︎ Jan 11 2014
I once tried to do a fancy knot in my necktie, but it turned out so bad I went crazy and summoned a Great Old One.
Never figured I would bring forth and Eldredge Abomination.
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︎ Jul 24 2018
If you struggle with a windsor knot...
does that make you a tie fighter?
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︎ Oct 27 2015
Can you undo a frayed knot ?
A frayed knot ?
Yes a frayed knot.
Afraid not.
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︎ Sep 25 2019
Knot knot
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︎ Aug 03 2018
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