I often feel like people with a more rationalist mindset, including myself, tend to gravitate towards non-fiction books (just the facts, please!). But lately I have been trying to re-Kindle (pun intended) my interest in reading fiction. As cliche as it sounds, I really do think that great works of literature are able to express something beautiful, deep, and true about the human condition.
I suppose I'll start! In no particular order:
The Road, The Sound and the Fury, Slaughterhouse-Five
Really hope Ryab finishes Bloodborne on stream this time! With FromSoft hyping a new game, and the Dark Souls remaster on the horizon, it has really re-kindled (pun intended) my love for Souls-Borne games!
The compersion on this one, y’all.
I love the ooey gooey look on his face when he talks about her. I love hearing that she’s wild about him. I love that they were able to reconnect after not really seeing each other for so long.
My heart is so full. It’s so romantic.
Edit to add: My gf says I should have added our ages. My bf is (28m), I’m (33nb), and his crush is (27f). And my gf is (31f) lol.
I am a very long time lurker. Very. I was a weekend warrior up until I was about 25 maybe then became a daily. Two bottles of wine possibly a day, or four litres of cider. Had two big sober streaks of a year, and a half a year somewhere in there. But that's not the point of this post. I've had many withdrawals, can't really count. But this year I levelled up. Was hospitalised in January which I can't remember much of but apparently I still had my wits about me enough to walk shaking like a leaf to my local hospital and muttered alcohol withdrawal and collapsed. That's what I remember. Left my doors open and unlocked, walked there barefoot. Im lucky I live close. But something changed. It wasn't just the pyshical withdrawal anymore that worried me. I was having major panic waves, major. DP/DR, racing thoughts when I closed my eyes. Like my brain was running at full throttle and I couldn't stop it. Hypnic jerks when I did sleep, bouncing up with panic. And I had partial seizures. Very lucky in that regard. This was in January and I sobered up for a few months then started binging every few days thinking I had control of this. Then one day after a heavy binge. Closed eye visuals again, gore, horrible shit. Shit I didn't wanna see, incredibly vivid horrifying dreams, jerked awake. What's fucking weird though is that the pyshical part is hardly there anymore when it use to be so prominent. The sweats, shakes. I sweat a little sometimes, shakes not so much. Heart rate is fine. BP spikes high but not dangerously so. It's all just a psychological nightmare now even after a few days of drinking heavily. Sometimes even one. Drinking use to be my escape but now there's just horror when I try too. It's not escape anymore. Anyway, im drinking now. I had about 8 units last night tonight will be a bit more. I think ill have to give this shit up unfortunately, or fortunately. Does this resonate with anyone? Feels like im losing my fucking mind. Sorry about the no paragraphs or typos. On my phone. Hope everyone's managing their holidays as best they can. Fucking rough time of year.
Edit: Im 32 now
21M, have had kindling type symptoms over the last year (olfactory hallucinations, irritability, the fear, shortness of breath). Ever since I suspected kindling, I've been drinking incredibly sparingly. Last year I drank on about 10 occasions, half of them were blackouts and half of them were moderated.
I finally went and saw a doctor... theyre confident that I can have a normal relationship with alcohol and they said that "it would be unusual if you kept withdrawing forever." They are a very good doctor.
I was almost certain I had kindling... the symptoms were so unmistakable... but now I don't know where to go from here. People close to me think it's all in my head / psychosomatic - and, they especially think this is so, after the doctors advice. I would love to keep drinking, but I am afraid of kindling/neurotixicity. Does anyone have any insight?
EDIT: Ok I should clarify... these symptoms only come up AFTER I've been drinking. In effect, I'm experiencing WDs at lower thresholds of drinking. The doctor said "you won't withdraw forever" as in "youll be able to drink and not withdraw in the future."
Phenibut, has completely destroyed alcohol and possibly all other GABAergics for me.
Honestly, I can't tell for sure if it's just the fact that I'm in a bit of a rough time these days and the winter season affecting my chemistry. But it's a pretty clear gut feeling. The rebound that I get after a night of drinking has become so pronounced and it seems like it might be the kindling from having went through phenibut withdrawal earlier this year.
Literally even a tiny amount of alcohol and pretty much after exactly 24 hours there is this odd, physical rebound. A sense of weird "impending doom". Easy to ignore when you had little but of course becomes full blown anxiety when it was a proper night of drinking.
So warning to everyone using this, ngl, crazy good substance: use it with respect and never ever get into a reckless habit of it. It sure was one of the best feelings I had rolling on pheni, but this is something to either follow the weeks/months rules similar to using MDMA if using recreationally, or keep your dose low and medicinal if you're using it frequently.
Open to hearing if anyone else had this experience and if anything helped "reverse/fix" the kindling. Time?
hey mates, i quit phenibut on 1st june, last year and didn't touch anything since then. i had 2 drinks now on new years eve and 3 gin tonics on the day before. yesterday night i started to feel the anxiety, paranoia, dizziness, brainfog, tiredness and hot and cold waves within my body again, which i know from the time i was tapering phenibut too fast.
i'm afraid now after all i read about kindling withdrawals that former alcoholics and benzo addicts experience, when they touch the substance again. it says that the risk of having seizures is exaggerated.
any advise how i should handle this now?
any similar experinces?
i have magnesium, NAC and lemon balm tea in my stack as well as a few valium for worst case scenarios, but i have read any gabaergic substance will only worsen the healing... so i really don't know what to do.
really appreciate your help!
I'm asking here because I don't trust doctors at all and can't find a doctor that understands this. I've been hospitalized due to withdrawal before. I was having closed-eye visuals, etc. So I think my brain messed up from that. I'm currently on 2.5mg Valium and want to get off so badly.
Hey All,
Look I understand we’ve all been through hell. I’m suffering still at 7 months and I know we should be focused on recovery and not getting back to drinking/partying.
Though look I’m 26 years old, I’m still young. I miss partying.
Has anyone who kindled themselves recovered completely and returned to drinking/recreational party drug use after some time.
I just want to hear some stories.
My symptoms are DPDR, extreme tiredness, shortness breath, anxiety, light sensitivity etc.
Cheers.
Edit: Or anyone who was on for 1 year + and cold Turkeyed. Answer please.
Been a year since I last drank, the other night I decided to experiment & try just have a couple beers, keep in mind that I used to be a heavy binge drinker. 22 rn started when I was 15-16, didn’t become a “problem” until about 3 years ago, ever since then it’s safe to say I had a serious drinking problem.
Anyways so back to the other night I had 8 Heineken 4.3, it was damn nice to have some beers though I will admit, but underwhelming to say the least. I didn’t blackout or do anything stupid, stayed hydrated and went to bed pretty wasted but not out of control. Woke up feeling ok a little bit of after glow I think. Through out the day I started to feel worse and worse the anxiety creeping in then by the time I went to bed, boom full on kindle withdrawals, night sweats, minor closed eye visuals, aches and numbness in my limbs, etc. now trust me these where nothing like they used to be when I was coming off say a 2 week binge but oh man this was not fun. Got maybe 2 hours of sleep. I’m honestly saddened at this age I’m already so kindled, was really hoping I could just have a few beers once and a while again and have no withdrawals. To all my fellow kindlers out there you have my utmost sympathy!
We just loved to party way to much and now have to deal with kindling for the rest of our life’s. I read someone’s comment on a post stating “Because people who quit drinking because of kindling/WDs don’t really want to quit. We’re kinda forced to”
BIG FACTS!!! I don’t want to go back to binge drinking slamming bottles of hard alcohol, but a few beers on a Friday night would have been nice. Guess not.
I’ll stick to my weed and occasionally trip on mushrooms or acid. Cali sober as they call it. Cali sober indeed!
Kindling is so fucked up.
IWNDWYT
https://stonegatecenter.com/an-alcoholics-favorite-vitamin-how-l-theanine-can-be-used-to-manage-alcohol-withdrawal-symptoms/
Hey all, I just beat queelag and I can now go to sens funhouse/anor londo, so should I go down and fight pinwheel so I can get +20 estus for s&o?
No one partnership our announcement is going to make the coin rise - it's like we're building a huge pile of wood...but the gas has not been poured and the match has not been lit yet.
That being said - the ground swell that is happening with Floki being plastered everywhere will be much more effective to fuel the firestorm when the final match is struck and all this kindling is set ablaze. People are familiar with the protocol by shear exposure in countless places - but what is the real trigger will be a marketing hook that will take normal folks - who don't care a bit about alternative currencies - to actually gamble fiat on this asset.
To exceed the size of DOGE and to become a top 10 coin, it has to pull people in who have never gambled on digital assets before. Sports is a good way to do it - by association, herd mentality, and team association. But...more we need.
A team in Asia: Korean or Japanese baseball, Australian rugby - then Central/South American football and you'll be going global...
This pyre is looking good - a few more teams in various leagues of disconnected sports and they could get that flame that won't just be a flash in the pan when the first 3 big exchanges list the coin.
**
This is all coming from someone who hates crypto-culture. My personal hell is any crypto telegram chat - every teenager around the world hoping their $20 will make them millionaires, and barely stringing together competent sentences. Not caring about fundamentals, all watching shitty Youtube channels with morons pretending that lines on a graph signal future movement - it's embarrassing to the entire ecosystem and absolutely does not help the adoption of alternative economic systems in a world that desperately needs new models designed for 8 billion people.
If the Floki marketing team is strategically placing the coin into leagues across the world before they try to buy their way onto an exchange, then I would think their strategy is smart. It seems to be a strategy that no other protocol has done to this extent prior - most others have integrated into respective industries - not just going for large-scale awareness before the exchanges.
DOGE was built from the ground up by the community. Floki is building from the top down, before the coin is already spread, and it would appear they're priming the pump for a major torch to light this whole field ablaze.
Here's to hoping...
Or do they?
Some of the folks I work with talk about their drinking and they put more away on the weekend than I do. Of course my weekend drinking isn’t much different from my Tuesday or Thursday, but they generally seem to go pretty heavy Friday-Sunday.
I definitely have gaba B kindling from messing around with GHB so many times and facing withdrawals without assistance.
Anyone get on baclofen with gaba kindling and taper off of it? Was it difficult to taper the baclofen? Been on 40-50mg per day for a month, but I definitely have gaba B kindling and worried it will be difficult.
Is it harder to taper off if I have kindling?
I was on 1mg of Klonopin in the morning and 1.5mg of Klonopin in the evening for about 7 years.
I successfully weaned off of it.
Over the past couple of months I’ve taken 0.25mg to 0.5mg about twice a week to help me deal with the horrid side effects of BuSpar. I went a whole month and fought against taking Klonopin when BuSpar’s side effects got really bad, but I’m just not functioning at all (can’t leave house, can’t drive, etc.)
My doctor decided to put me on 0.5mg a day of Klonopin until I can adjust to BuSpar - hopefully just for the next month or two.
I know everyone is different but I am TERRIFIED of having awful withdrawal due to kindling.
Can anyone offer any kind words of encouragement? I’m so scared, but I don’t know what else to do.
Just starting to plan my next year purchases and one thing I do not have is a knife or hatchet to split kindling. I am thinking a knife for batoning would be the best idea, but I’m open to suggestions. Thanks!
I am a very long time lurker. Very. I was a weekend warrior up until I was about 25 maybe then became a daily. Two bottles of wine possibly a day, or four litres of cider. Had two big sober streaks of a year, and a half a half somewhere in there. But that's not the point of this post. I've had many withdrawals, can't really count. But this year I levelled up. Was hospitalised in January which I can't remember much of but apparently I still had my wits about me enough to walk shaking like a leaf to my local hospital and muttered alcohol withdrawal and collapsed. That's what I remember. Left my doors open and unlocked, walked there barefoot. Im lucky I live close. But something changed. It wasn't just the pyshical withdrawal anymore that worried me. I was having major panic waves, major. DP/DR, racing thoughts when I closed my eyes. Like my brain was running at full throttle and I couldn't stop it. Hypnic jerks when I did sleep, bouncing up with panic. And I had partial seizures. Very lucky in that regard. This was in January and I sobered up for a few months then started binging every few days thinking I had control of this. Then one day after a heavy binge. Closed eye visuals again, gore, horrible shit. Shit I didn't wanna see, incredibly vivid horrifying dreams, jerked awake. What's fucking weird though is that the pyshical part is hardly there anymore when it use to be so prominent. The sweats, shakes. I sweat a little sometimes, shakes not so much. Heart rate is fine. BP spikes high but not dangerously so. It's all just a psychological nightmare now even after a few days of drinking heavily. Sometimes even one. Drinking use to be my escape but now there's just horror when I try too. It's not escape anymore. Anyway, im drinking now. I had about 8 units last night tonight will be a bit more. I think ill have to give this shit up unfortunately, or fortunately. Does this resonate with anyone? Feels like im losing my fucking mind. Sorry about the no paragraphs or typos. On my phone. Hope everyone's managing their holidays as best they can. Fucking rough time of year.
Edit: Im 32 now
