Barbie and Ken are continually arguing over who will empty the dishwasher. One day, Ken says "Barbie, I've unloaded the dishwasher every day this week.. can you PLEASE do it just this once?"

..."No, Ken do"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/canadaddy-o
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did Ken shrink his street fighting friend's blue box?

He heard you have to reduce Ryu's recycle.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
🚨︎ report
An American, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German where all attending a Zoom meeting. The Supervisor asked β€œcan you see me ok?”

To which they answered β€œyes” β€œoui” β€œsi” β€œja”.

πŸ‘︎ 1k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2021
🚨︎ report
When Barbie called Ken his bro...

Ken was broken.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/moronphoton
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What did Ryu tell Ken when he asked if he could borrow ten bucks?

"Shoryuken."

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bricksnblasters
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Ken, Chicken
πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lazy-____-Cat
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
🚨︎ report
After getting my wife pregnant with my second child, my daughter asked me why Barbie doesn’t make a pregnant Barbie.

I told her it was because Ken came in another box.

πŸ‘︎ 177
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why don’t we have pregnant barbies?

Because ken came in a different box...

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/justaguy2727
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Mu friend Ken fell out of my window on the second floor the same day he had a little sister...

Now he is broken.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pigenator
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does Ken feel so hot?

He’s waiting in a Barbie queue.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Ken, a master martial artist, was worried about winning his next fight. He asked his friend Ryu, "Do you think I can win this fight?" Ryu confidently responded:

"Shoryuken!"

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheOtherAvaz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
🚨︎ report
Why are we calling her Barbie...

When we can call her chick-ken?

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rozsaszin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I have a sheep called Ken

His girlfriend is baa-bie

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Homer_Simpson2
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2018
🚨︎ report
Ken goes to the egg factory

A guy name Ken is late for his work at the Egg Factory. As he was running to work, he steps on yellow wet paint and it got all over his shoes and pants. He thought about going back home, but he trudged on. Then as he walked by a building a bucket of red paint spilled all over his hair. His hair was all red and thought about going back home, but he kept on going. Finally, he just needed to cross the street to get to work, but suddenly two trucks, one carrying glue and one carrying feathers, crashed into one another and it got all over Ken. He couldn't go home now since he just needed to cross the street to get to work, and so he did. As he went through the sliding doors, his boss said to him "Gee Ken! Your'e late for work!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ElvisEggsly
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2018
🚨︎ report
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tutandgroan
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2018
🚨︎ report
My reaction to the Bill Nye v. Ken Ham debate last night
πŸ‘︎ 52
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lenoh
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2014
🚨︎ report
You want to know how I know that Ken never hits Barbie?

Battery not included

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Barsabbas
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2018
🚨︎ report
How does Ryu greet Ken?

how-YOU-ken

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the authorities do when Barbie's boyfriend was involved in a serious car accident?

They contacted his next of Ken.

That's a damn good joke. I'm proud of that joke.

πŸ‘︎ 132
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter asked if she could cut the hair off of one of her barbies to make a boy barbie.

I said "You Ken if you want to."

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/clowncar83
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
How race is Ken bone?

Ken-bone-dian!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Lemonplay
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2016
🚨︎ report
A Russian Nesting doll and a Barbie doll were having an argument about Ken, who they both liked.

The Russian nesting doll said "I've got so many more layers to me than you, honey."

Barbie didn't care though. It was a cheap shot, and as she pointed out, "At least I'm not hollow on the inside."

And Ken was laying her every damn night anyway, so the original statement wasn't strictly true.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2016
🚨︎ report
β€œI have a split personality,” said Tom, being Frank.
πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deanosuprema
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter: Ken Dodd's Dad's Dog's Dead

Daughter: Say that four times fast. Me: THAT-THAT-THAT-THAT Daughter: groan

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ClaudiusOrsmond
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2016
🚨︎ report
I asked my daughter why she cut all her barbies in half. . .

She replied in an unexpected country accent, "I'm dolly partin'!"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BlaggardWorm
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
Ken M visits an expansive bar (image)

https://i.imgur.com/xEn5n7D.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nikoma
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2015
🚨︎ report
Naming My Son Ken - Dad Joke

I’m going to name my child Ken so when he gets to the age where he starts asking questions like β€œdo you know how to…” I can say, with a smirk on my face, β€œHa do Ken”

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DracorexGeek
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2015
🚨︎ report
Dad Joke on Ken Block

http://imgur.com/1UUdwcw

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MulletWhip
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2014
🚨︎ report
Me: Look, I'm going to throw this ninja star

Friend: No you can't

Me: Shur I ken

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter acted as if she didn't enjoy this one, but I KNOW she did...

http://i.imgur.com/xTjEZNI.jpg

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yourbrotherrex
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2016
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend was running her fingers through my chest hair and says...

"I love that you are hairy".

I said, "I'm Ken who the heck is Harry?"

She hit me, she actually hit me for that.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ReverendKen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2016
🚨︎ report
My wife asked if I could go one day without mentioning ninjas.

I said: shur I ken!

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GuyOnTheStreet
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the monk β€˜Brother Kenneth’ always need fixing?

Because he is Bro Ken.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr-E-Droflah
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
How do an Englishman, a Frenchman and an Israeli greet Barack Obama?

Yes

Oui (Yes in French)

Χ›ΧŸ (Ken - Yes in Hebrew)

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pfo_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the foot earn for coming first in the running competition?

A golden toe-ken.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the Japanese street fighter say when he met the American?

R yu Ken?

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Capn__Brunch
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2018
🚨︎ report
A chicken crossed the road and met James Bond

'What's your name?' Asked the chicken, 'Bond, James Bond. Whats yours?', 'Ken, Chick Ken.

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jack_oss
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2018
🚨︎ report
Can you perform a spinning dragon uppercut

Shor-yu-ken

Ba-dum tss

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheGamerBoy015
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2018
🚨︎ report
Dad's really proud of this one. "What do you call a group of barbies lining up for a sausage?"

A Barbiequeue

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MarkTaylorFacts
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2014
🚨︎ report
I'm a prosecutor, and we had our morning meeting, and I was asked to leave over this one

1: "The fight was in the kitchen area at the restaurant between the bus boy and the dish washer."

Me:" Who is the defendant? "

1: "The dish washer. "

Me: " Is it the State v. Ken More? (Kenmore)"

2: "Get out."

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PraetorianXVIII
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you call a male Barbie doll who used to be in a frat and lost his self-confidence?

Bro-ken

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/anondnow
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2017
🚨︎ report
Thanks to the following individuals for helping persuade me to become vegan ... (xpost /r/vegetarian)

Thanks to the following individuals for helping persuade me to become vegan:

Ron Acerous, Sal Amander, Herb Avore, Chic Adee, Al Bacore, Paul R Baer, Al Batros, Wally Bee, Lady Bugg, Jay Byrd, Ann Chovie, Anna Condra, Barry Cuda, Terry Dactyl, Ray N Deer, Flo N Der , Erma Dillo, Ann Enome, Terry Err, Liz Erd, Ann Fibian, Dale Finn, Redd Fox, Buddy Fly, Ken Garoo, Allie Gator, Billy Goat, Pan Guin, Ann Gus, Hal Ibut, Bob Katz, Tom Katz, Anne Kelosaurous, Don Key, Ann T. Lope, Moe Lusk, C. Lyon, Chip Monk, Flo Mingo, Sal Mon, Anna Mull, Barr Nicole, Kay Nine, Kyle Otee, Al Paca, Lia Pard, Millie Pede, Ellie Phant, Arthur Podd, Jack Rabbit, Gerry Raffe, Ty Ranaceourous, Mack Rell, Wally Rus, Jack Russel, Fez Sant, Dina Sauer, Drew Sophila, Chris Station, Hal Steen, Clyde Sudale, Ann Teeter, Pan Ther, Earl Thurfworm, Tara Ann Tula, Bea Tule, Ray Venn, Bea Ver, and Beau Vine.

I couldn't have done it without your support !!!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheStupidVegNoob
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2016
🚨︎ report
During her college years, why did Barbie call the technicians when her boyfriend joined a fraternity?

Because he was bro-ken.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/enfo13
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2016
🚨︎ report
Discussing my parent's cats name with my dad...

We call him Kenjamin but his proper name is Kenjamin Benjamin. This was our text message exchange yesterday and thought it was worthy of sharing.

Dad: After watching the olympics I decided Kenjamin is Chinese.

Me: What? I need you to explain further.

Dad: Ken Xia Minh

Me: Oh my god...

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sleia
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2016
🚨︎ report
What did Ryu say to Ken when he asked to come over?

Shoryuken!

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Epik_Low
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2015
🚨︎ report
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant?

Because Ken comes in another box.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MegaMarkulus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2017
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.