Interactive urinal Puns

SEGA and other old but gold video-urinals

https://www.brokenhousecompany.it/blog/ilsanitario/en/2021/07/01/the-toylet-the-interactive-urine-game-by-sega-wasnt-the-only-one/

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Denial. Anger. Negotiation. Depression/sorrow. Acceptance. The five stages of grief. I learned about them briefly in paramedic school. We studied it with more application specifics in nursing school. It was covered a little more in depth in psychology 101. I learned that it's not necessarily a linear process. People can bounce around through these stages, like a pinball, when severely strained. Regardless of what I know about it intellectually, as a critical care nurse, watching my patients and their family members go through it still can overwhelm me at times. Tonight was one of those nights.

The patient that I'm thinking of was a male in his upper 50s with a previous medical history of high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He was not vaccinated against Covid-19. The patient’s spouse had been diagnosed with Covid-19 about 10 days prior, and, of course, he ended up sick as well. He came to the hospital after about a week of persistent fevers with worsening shortness of breath.

When he got to the emergency department, his blood oxygen percentage levels (SpO2) were found to be abysmal, in the 50-60% range. A normal range is 92-99%. This is one of the features of significant Covid-19 sickness: the surprisingly low SpO2 levels far exceeding the presenting symptoms. The patient was admitted to the ICU on continuous positive pressure ventilation given by a pressurized mask with straps going around his head to hold it onto his face. We call it AVAPS, although that is technically the name of the advanced setting being used. He stabilized pretty well on that, and his SpO2 levels improved up to the range of 93-97%. Eventually he only needed AVAPS some of the time, and was stable on a high flow nasal cannula otherwise.

The patient and his wife had multiple conversations with the critical care doctor, and he adamantly did not want to be placed on a ventilator if it came to that. Per his instructions, we would do anything and everything to help him recover, but if he stopped breathing, or if his heart stopped, we would only do comfort measures. We would not perform CPR or place him on a breathing machine. In our state, this is called a DNR-CCA.

The first time I personally met him was his second day in ICU. I wasn’t his primary nurse, but he had put the call light on because the IV pump was beeping. We chatted for a bit while I fixed the problem, and he was pleasant, cooperative, and determined to get better. He looked uncomfortable, and I could tell that

so about five months ago my boyfriend and i adopted our dog. he’s a half american eskimo half shetland sheepdog that goes by the name of winston. he’s four years old and neutered. we don’t know too awful much about his history before he was adopted by my friends who eventually gave him to us. we know he was a stray and was terrified of humans. no one could catch him. since we’ve adopted him, he’s has an issue with urinating when he’s excited. for example, when we’d get him and let him out of the kennel, he’d jump all over us and if we pet him or acknowledged him, he’d squat and pee. we’ve learned not to even look at him until he’s calmed down. however, we’re still dealing with his submissive urinating. my boyfriend, who he considers to be the “dominant” master, is just as close with him as i am. they cuddle on the couch, winston comforts him whenever he’s upset, they wrestle on the ground together, etc. however, putting on his harness to go outside, approaching him too rapidly, or even sometimes just leaning down to pet him will result in him urinating on the floor. he doesn’t really ever do this with me, but it’s constant with my boyfriend. winston will run up to him excitedly when he gets home from work, but then my boyfriend will reach down to pet him and he’ll pee. i know it’s about him trying to convey that he’s not a threat, etc. but it’s really causing issues and preventing my boyfriend from bonding with winston. we don’t know how to stop it. does anyone have any ideas or comments regarding this bad habit?

I don't want to step on anybody's toes here, but the amount of non-dad jokes here in this subreddit really annoys me. First of all, dad jokes CAN be NSFW, it clearly says so in the sub rules. Secondly, it doesn't automatically make it a dad joke if it's from a conversation between you and your child. Most importantly, the jokes that your CHILDREN tell YOU are not dad jokes. The point of a dad joke is that it's so cheesy only a dad who's trying to be funny would make such a joke. That's it. They are stupid plays on words, lame puns and so on. There has to be a clever pun or wordplay for it to be considered a dad joke.

Again, to all the fellow dads, I apologise if I'm sounding too harsh. But I just needed to get it off my chest.

The crew venture deeper into the 'bergs and Jeruzz thaps his way into people's hearts (and minds)

The rest of the series can be found here

***

“This is Bannon Station,” a female said in crisp, perfect Terran, “Be advised that you are within range of our weapons. State your business.”

“Hospitable cousin-fuckers aren’t they?” Mike muttered from his station. Turns out that he had cross-trained in electronic warfare once he got out, a nice little surprise. The Paper Tiger didn’t have mounted weapons, but it did have… options… when it came to defense.

“Hey y’aw,” Jessie, their resident MAGA whisperer, drawled happily, “Wedee Paper Tiger. Y’aw kno we comin’?”

“(sigh) Stand by for confirmation,” the female said wearily. “… Identity and credentials confirmed. Welcome Paper Tiger. Please proceed to docking bay six, berth four. One individual will debark, unarmed, and await a security team.”

“Yew got it sistah,” Jessie giggled. She loved talking like this.

“You are really enjoying yourself, aren’t you, grav-butt?”

“Yew kno eet!”

“(sigh) Just go to your berth, you curved-space addled moron,” the woman said with clear amusement. “Wait… you wouldn’t happen to be Jessie-Bug from da’ Lobby would you?”

“(giggle) Guilty as charged, ma’am!” Jessie drawled.

“Wel’ sheet!” the woman exclaimed. “Git on in here, gurl!… Hey y’all!” she yelled her voice a bit more distant, “You’ll never guess who jes’ showed up!”

The transmission ended.

“Something you would like to share with us?” Sheila asked, as she raised an eyebrow, “...’Jessie-Bug’?”

“Um...” Jessie giggled, “I might have had a just a little bit of a reputation back in the day… for being a good upstanding citizen, of course.”

“Of course...”

“Um, guys,” T’sunk’al inquired as he slowly started to accelerate the ship, “Is Bannon Station rotating for the reason I think it is?”

“If that reason is that they are a pack of technologically regressed hicks that believe that artificial gravity is literally the devil’s work,” Sheila replied, “Then yes.”

“Interesting,” T’sunk’al said as he matched the station’s rotation. “We had similar concerns shortly after first contact. It wasn’t from a theological perspective, but more than one skeptic had concerns about the graviton fields generated by the gravity generator and how they would interact with… things… Of course that faded quickly.”

“Well that’s the thing about these guys,” Sheila smirke

I guess the concept didn't work

Hey yall, just wondering if you know any jrpgs with toilets or bathrooms. one needs to wonder how npcs do their business. It's pretty weird that they are non-existent in the genre. What do you think?

Alot of great jokes get posted here! However just because you have a joke, doesn't mean it's a dad joke.

THIS IS NOT ABOUT NSFW, THIS IS ABOUT LONG JOKES, BLONDE JOKES, SEXUAL JOKES, KNOCK KNOCK JOKES, POLITICAL JOKES, ETC BEING POSTED IN A DAD JOKE SUB

Try telling these sexual jokes that get posted here, to your kid and see how your spouse likes it.. if that goes well, Try telling one of your friends kid about your sex life being like Coca cola, first it was normal, than light and now zero , and see if the parents are OK with you telling their kid the "dad joke"

I'm not even referencing the NSFW, I'm saying Dad jokes are corny, and sometimes painful, not sexual

So check out r/jokes for all types of jokes

r/unclejokes for dirty jokes

r/3amjokes for real weird and alot of OC

r/cleandadjokes If your really sick of seeing not dad jokes in r/dadjokes

Punchline !

Edit: this is not a post about NSFW , This is about jokes, knock knock jokes, blonde jokes, political jokes etc being posted in a dad joke sub

Edit 2: don't touch the thermostat

Do your worst!

How the hell am I suppose to know when it’s raining in Sweden?

This is a Repost

OP is u/Planetsahead/

TW: Mental Illness, Animal Abuse, Depression, Assault.

Part 1

TL;DR for the whole saga

UPDATE 3: Tokyo Drift

Hello everyone, it’s been about 2 months since the peeshow started and i’ve gotten a lot of messages and comments recently asking for an update and in general most of them were nice and lovely (as always there’s of course exceptions but at this point of my existence i’m resigned to them and assume are just part of internet culture).

First of all i’d like to apologize for taking so long to update, i know there’s a lot of people very curious about everything that’s happened with Ted’s family but i just needed some time to process things but here i am sharing yet another miserable piece of this story so you can all be in peace. I’d also like to welcome the Facebook people, i appreciate people telling me where they’re coming from because i didn’t know the power of reddit before i made my first AITA post.

Anyway, Ted asked me for time apart, he himself is going through a lot of things and has a lot of feelings that me being with him makes worse. He has a lot of guilt and opening so many closets with skeletons and facing them is a lot to ask of anyone. We’re not officially divorced but we are not looking for new houses together either. We are still in the process of selling our old place so he’s been staying there while i stay with my parents. I don’t know what’s going to happen once the sale of our place is finalized or what he wants to do but i promised him space so yeah, there’s that. He did give me permission to update you all because despite some hateful messages and comments most of you are incredibly sweet and helpful.

Here’s the breakdown of Ted’s family tree updated counting the sisters.

B stands for brother (of ted’s), S stands for Sister

B#1 doctor with some type of military background. Wife, 3 kids. B#2 surgeon, wife, 2 dogs and a bearded dragon B#3 engineer, fiancé and dog B#4 teacher and researcher, wife, 1 kid S #1 B#5 ??? Works in IT not sure of details, w

Ants don’t even have the concept fathers, let alone a good dad joke. Keep r/ants out of my r/dadjokes.

But no, seriously. I understand rule 7 is great to have intelligent discussion, but sometimes it feels like 1 in 10 posts here is someone getting upset about the jokes on this sub. Let the mods deal with it, they regulate the sub.

Mathematical puns makes me number

They were cooked in Greece.

I'm surprised it hasn't decade.

Now that I listen to albums, I hardly ever leave the house.

Denial. Anger. Negotiation. Depression/sorrow. Acceptance. The five stages of grief. I learned about them briefly in paramedic school. We studied it with more application specifics in nursing school. It was covered a little more in depth in psychology 101. I learned that it's not necessarily a linear process. People can bounce around through these stages, like a pinball, when severely strained. Regardless of what I know about it intellectually, as a critical care nurse, watching my patients and their family members go through it still can overwhelm me at times. Tonight was one of those nights.

The patient that I'm thinking of was a male in his upper 50s with a previous medical history of high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He was not vaccinated against Covid-19. The patient’s spouse had been diagnosed with Covid-19 about 10 days prior, and, of course, he ended up sick as well. He came to the hospital after about a week of persistent fevers with worsening shortness of breath.

When he got to the emergency department, his blood oxygen percentage levels (SpO2) were found to be abysmal, in the 50-60% range. A normal range is 92-99%. This is one of the features of significant Covid-19 sickness: the surprisingly low SpO2 levels far exceeding the presenting symptoms. The patient was admitted to the ICU on continuous positive pressure ventilation given by a pressurized mask with straps going around his head to hold it onto his face. We call it AVAPS, although that is technically the name of the advanced setting being used. He stabilized pretty well on that, and his SpO2 levels improved up to the range of 93-97%. Eventually he only needed AVAPS some of the time, and was stable on a high flow nasal cannula otherwise.

The patient and his wife had multiple conversations with the critical care doctor, and he adamantly did not want to be placed on a ventilator if it came to that. Per his instructions, we would do anything and everything to help him recover, but if he stopped breathing, or if his heart stopped, we would only do comfort measures. We would not perform CPR or place him on a breathing machine. In our state, this is called a DNR-CCA.

The first time I personally met him was his second day in ICU. I wasn’t his primary nurse, but he had put the call light on because the IV pump was beeping. We chatted for a bit while I fixed the problem, and he was pleasant, cooperative, and determined to get better. He looked uncomfortable, and I could tell that he w

Denial. Anger. Negotiation. Depression/sorrow. Acceptance. The five stages of grief. I learned about them briefly in paramedic school. We studied it with more application specifics in nursing school. It was covered a little more in depth in psychology 101. I learned that it's not necessarily a linear process. People can bounce around through these stages, like a pinball, when severely strained. Regardless of what I know about it intellectually, as a critical care nurse, watching my patients and their family members go through it still can overwhelm me at times. Tonight was one of those nights.

The patient that I'm thinking of was a male in his upper 50s with a previous medical history of high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He was not vaccinated against Covid-19. The patient’s spouse had been diagnosed with Covid-19 about 10 days prior, and, of course, he ended up sick as well. He came to the hospital after about a week of persistent fevers with worsening shortness of breath.

When he got to the emergency department, his blood oxygen percentage levels (SpO2) were found to be abysmal, in the 50-60% range. A normal range is 92-99%. This is one of the features of significant Covid-19 sickness: the surprisingly low SpO2 levels far exceeding the presenting symptoms. The patient was admitted to the ICU on continuous positive pressure ventilation given by a pressurized mask with straps going around his head to hold it onto his face. We call it AVAPS, although that is technically the name of the advanced setting being used. He stabilized pretty well on that, and his SpO2 levels improved up to the range of 93-97%. Eventually he only needed AVAPS some of the time, and was stable on a high flow nasal cannula otherwise.

The patient and his wife had multiple conversations with the critical care doctor, and he adamantly did not want to be placed on a ventilator if it came to that. Per his instructions, we would do anything and everything to help him recover, but if he stopped breathing, or if his heart stopped, we would only do comfort measures. We would not perform CPR or place him on a breathing machine. In our state, this is called a DNR-CCA.

The first time I personally met him was his second day in ICU. I wasn’t his primary nurse, but he had put the call light on because the IV pump was beeping. We chatted for a bit while I fixed the problem, and he was pleasant, cooperative, and determined to get better. He looked uncomfortable, and I could tell that