Did you hear of the new disease going through France?

I've heard it was a Paris-ite

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📅︎ Jul 07 2020
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My son was born today (totally true story)

A couple of hours later, I text my wife

"I don't want to alarm you, but I'm the hospital"

edit: the original message

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📅︎ Dec 23 2019
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How do you know when your Indian friend is getting annoying?

When you start to get Sikh of his Shi'ite

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👤︎ u/Slesheo
📅︎ Jul 23 2019
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"Good morning, Beautiful! I'm only wearing two pieces of my three piece suit today."

My wife looked up at me, "And...?"

"I guess I'm sorry for not telling you that you married a sans-vest-ite."

She stared blankly at me and then rolled her eyes.

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📅︎ Feb 02 2018
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What did the geologist call his favorite rock?

Favor-ite

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👤︎ u/TruHarley
📅︎ Jun 03 2017
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What did the astronaut put on his horse?

A saddle-ite.

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📅︎ Dec 30 2016
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Barefoot in Paris

I was walking with my daughter in Paris, dressed up after going to her sister's graduation. "These high-heels are killing me," she complained.

"Take them off," I suggested.

"i don't want to get, I don't know, France-tetanus."

"Yeah, that and... Paris-ites."

True story.

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👤︎ u/malvoliosf
📅︎ May 28 2014
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