I made this little Honeymoon pin, get it? Honey- moon? hope you like it! (:
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📅︎ Mar 24 2020
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Where did the two bees go on their honeymoon?

Polynesia

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📅︎ Apr 28 2020
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Have you ever had a honeymoon salad?

Lettuce alone, no dressing.

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📅︎ Sep 08 2020
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It's the morning after the honeymoon

Wife says, "You know, you're really a lousy lover."

The husband replies, "How can you tell after only 30 seconds?"

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📅︎ Aug 10 2020
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Where did Prince Charles spend his first honeymoon?

In-diana.

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📅︎ Apr 23 2020
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Wife dropped this one on our honeymoon.

We're unpacking our bags on our cruise ship. I complain that all my clothes are wrinkled and there's no ironing board in the cabin. She replies:

"Don't worry. Everyone here's in the same boat."

She was already starting to laugh before she stopped talking.

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👤︎ u/cander79
📅︎ Jan 20 2016
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I asked my kid to make us a honeymoon salad. Lettuce alone.
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👤︎ u/Spotter66
📅︎ May 01 2019
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Where did the ruler and sharpener go to on their honeymoon?

Pennsylvania

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👤︎ u/Lordlewis6
📅︎ Mar 11 2019
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My dad always orders a "honeymoon salad"

Just lettuce alone

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📅︎ Dec 13 2018
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My Grandfather's Honeymoon Joke

So my grandfather is on his honeymoon with our grandmother and they are driving to Las Vegas, on their way there they see a fellow on the side of the road. They debate about taking him to the city instead of leaving him there, the end up letting him get a ride to the city, they say "Hey sir, want a ride to the city?" He replies "sure thanks", they drive down the road and notice he has a bag, so they ask " what's in the bag?" He replies with "None of your damn business" they start to think in their heads, what if he has something illegal or dangerous, so my grandfather takes action, he goes to the side of the road and pretends to fake piss and opens the door and my grandmother kicks him out and my grandfather gets back in locks the door and they speed off, as they're driving they notice he left his back and dropped it in the car, they decide to open and see what it beholds, they open the bag and find a single piece of paper, the paper had wording on it, it said "None of your damn business."

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👤︎ u/Lerrou
📅︎ Nov 19 2018
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Honeymoon trip

A newly married couple were confused on how to spend their honeymoon , the husband wanted to go to Australia first but the wife wanted to go to TIC TAC world(coz fuck logic). Upon further debate they ended on going to australia first because the husband thought the sequence was authentic.

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👤︎ u/ashfaq_haq
📅︎ Aug 03 2017
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Why was the melon sad it couldn't go on a destination honeymoon?

It cantelope

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📅︎ Apr 19 2018
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What is the honeymoon salad?

Leaf us alone without the dressing.

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📅︎ Dec 27 2017
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Today my wife and I on our honeymoon were headed to Prague on a train from Munich.

Across from us in the train was a very nice older couple from California. We are also American so naturally we got along just fine. As we were towards the end of our trip coming into Prague. The older man across from us looks at his wife and says, "What do you get when you marry a woman from the Czech Republic? A Czech mate". His wife's eyes rolled to the back of her head while my wife and I slowly looked at each other and busted out with laughter. Great way to end the 5.75 hour train ride.

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📅︎ Oct 03 2015
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On our honeymoon in Disneyworld last week...

Went to Disney for our Honeymoon last week.. We went into the Presidents Hall, and on the floor in the middle of the room is The Great Seal of The United States I take one glance at my new wife... "That's not a seal, that's an eagle!" I got a few groans and a couple of laughs from dads around the room. Im not a dad yet... But I think Ill do just fine.

Edit: http://imgur.com/dV5hb71 is a picture of the actual seal from Disneyworld

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👤︎ u/883iron
📅︎ Oct 19 2015
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My sister just got back from her honeymoon in FL, and landed straight into a dadjoke.

The newly wedded couple's flight home last night was delayed from bad weather. She sent a group text this morning, letting us know they arrived safely. Of course, Dad responds, "Bet your arms are TIRED!"

No one said anything, so he added "Because you just flew in from Tampa!"

I could practically hear the eye roll from the airport.

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📅︎ Aug 17 2015
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Can you bring me a honeymoon salad?

Just lettuce alone, no dressing.

(Said by an elderly customer to my gf, who is a waitress. I don't condone customers treating servers this way, but it made her laugh.)

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📅︎ Sep 20 2013
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What's in a honeymoon salad?

Lettuce alone

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📅︎ May 02 2019
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What's in a honeymoon salad?

Lettuce alone.

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📅︎ Jan 13 2019
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