Why was hitler hit with a baseball?

Because he did nazi it coming.

πŸ‘︎ 37
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sontrii
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
🚨︎ report
. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/redwitch-fr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you explain getting hit with a baseball bat made of sound?

It Hertz.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pepisboi420
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I hit my friend with a baseball bat

He couldn't look me in the eye after what I did

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Just got hit by the ultimate baseball dad joke...

Watching the Pirates and Brewers game tonight and the ole pops drops this one on me:

"I'm pretty sure we got a Locke on this game cause this guys gonna Lohse"

The names of the starting pitchers... -_-

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smokeybonez
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2015
🚨︎ report
Baseball has to be the most nostalgic sport

Cause no matter if they are right or left handed batters, they always hit close to home.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
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The greatest baseball player ever was a guy named Hugh McBealy, and he was most famous for every single time he came to the plate knocking the ball high over right field and into the stands.

He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.

He earned the nickname β€œthe machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.

And the day he retired a reporter asked him β€œHow does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”

Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. β€œWhat do you mean?” He said.

The reporter clarified β€œliterally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”

Hugh looked dejected and disappointed β€œyeah, my greatest failure...”

β€œWhat do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.

Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.

β€œI’ve been aiming left this whole time”

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frnklfrwsr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why my baseball was getting bigger....

But then it hit me!

My little girl shared that with me todayπŸ’“

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mqpickens
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of animal is best at hitting baseballs?

A bat

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CanadianBoi0
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the baseball player that is also a hacker?

They've been hitting everyone with their.bat

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/saf_sy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the duck cry after hitting a baseball?

Because it was fowl

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GetOffMyLawn45
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the Difference between Driving and Baseball?

In Baseball, hit and runs are encouraged!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mr_Rueben
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 21
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are birds terrible at baseball?

They always hit fowl balls

>!if you don't get it a fowl is a bird!<

>!not really sure if that's a thing i have to write but rule 6 yo!<

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kirbykirby56
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I couldn't realise why the baseball was just floating in the air.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ewan2006
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2019
🚨︎ report
/r/baseball did not appreciate my post - I think it’s better suited here anyway

I have a bunch of stupid baseball questions. I know most of the rules, I just want to make sure I have all my bases covered.

  • Imagine there’s a fan of the team that is currently fielding in the stands, and that said fan has a prosthetic arm. The batter hits a pitch and sends it on a home-run trajectory into the stands. If the fan in the stands throws his arm at the ball and diverts it back in the field of play, can they rightfully say that they were just β€œlending the team a hand” by stopping the home run?

  • Consider the exact opposite situation - the fan’s team is at bat and the batter hits a fly ball to the outfield. If Elastagirl from the Incredibles just happened to be the fan in question, can she spring into action and catch the ball before the outfielder has the chance to?

  • Now, imagine I smuggled a water gun into the stadium on a particularly hot day, and I managed to squirt sticky black liquid onto the batter. Does that mean he can take a walk since he was β€œhit by pitch”?

  • Consider the freak circumstance where a ball in motion collides with a bird, causing it to spiral in its descent and eventually collide in turn with an umpire. Can the player responsible for the ball’s motion be ejected from the game due to repeatedly flipping the bird at an umpire?

  • Can a losing team sub out their man on the mound with a large quantity of beer to prolong the game? There’d still be a pitcher on the mound!

  • If a pitcher throws a slider into the strike zone and the batter doesn’t swing, should the umpire consider it a strike, a ball, or the catcher’s dinner?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/grumpy_princess
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
🚨︎ report
No one could find the home run baseball...

It was hit and away...get it, "hidden" away knee slap

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2017
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger, then it hit me.
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/queen_pickles_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was Hitler hit with a baseball?

Because he did nazi it coming.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mightypaper
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2017
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jpereira73
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Boggo_0
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I didn’t know why the baseball was getting bigger.

And then it hit me!

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I didn’t get how the baseball was getting bigger and bigger.

And then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jtfiction
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Why do criminals play baseball?

they can hit, run and steal.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bustab0x
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kitty3_14
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger...

... And then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chuckyocouch_
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/WaltsTwoCents
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I couldn’t figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball got bigger.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/electric_leper
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I was asked if I like baseball

It’s really hit or miss

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nom_nom44
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/meltedpickless
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2018
🚨︎ report
First, I didn't realize why the baseball was getting bigger...

...but then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adolescensamhet
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What is a baseball player's favorite kind of traffic collision?

Hit and run.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/2friends_12pizzas
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2018
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger...

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Leomelonseeds
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2018
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger and bigger.

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/125bench
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2018
🚨︎ report
I didnt know how fast the baseball was going when he threw it.

But then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jordeeen_music
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2018
🚨︎ report
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger ...

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 42
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/zahi36501
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2017
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why the baseball grew bigger and bigger,

Then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/BOOBOO1999
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2017
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger..

And then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 41
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MajesticStag
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2015
🚨︎ report
I heard a great baseball bat joke

which is great because usually baseball bat jokes are hit or miss

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/americk0
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2018
🚨︎ report
Was wondering why the baseball was growing bigger and bigger...

And then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/evisceraze
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2017
🚨︎ report
I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger...

Then it hit me.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2017
🚨︎ report
I wondered where the baseball went

And then it hit me

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SekariTwo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2017
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 77
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report

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