30 Hilarious Get Hard Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, “Dad get out of the way!”

I said, “You’re the ones blocking!”

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👤︎ u/Colbosky

📅︎ Jun 27 2020

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Why is it so hard to get a date with a girl who likes horses?

Because she is already in a stable relationship...

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👤︎ u/Thomid

📅︎ Nov 22 2020

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Why did the snowman get a hard on?

He heard the snowblower coming

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👤︎ u/Brock_Walker

📅︎ Jul 21 2020

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This might be hard to get, but a Man walks into a tavern and..ahh forget it.

Too much of an Inn joke.

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👤︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2

📅︎ Aug 01 2020

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Damn I heard about this one cult, but it’s really hard to get into

I guess you could say it’s pretty diffi-cult.

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👤︎ u/SakuraYanfuyu

📅︎ Jun 30 2020

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I was prescribed medication but I couldn't take it. It was too hard to get the lid off. You might have heard of it...

TRYOPENIN

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👤︎ u/shdchko

📅︎ May 17 2020

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It’s not that hard to get into the Naval Forces.

I mean, we were all semen at one point.

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👤︎ u/Iforgotmylogins

📅︎ Mar 19 2020

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My daughter asked me to get her something hard to write on

So I brought her some sand.

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👤︎ u/dandan_56

📅︎ Mar 20 2020

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I worked pretty hard at reposting this, can I get some appreciation

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👤︎ u/SeeWhatEyeSee

📅︎ Jun 14 2019

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It's so hard to get numbers like 3, 9, and 17 to be productive.

They literally can't even

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👤︎ u/Chateau512

📅︎ Mar 08 2020

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If sugar daddy gets hard, he becomes a caramel daddy.

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👤︎ u/IDoNotNeedAnUsername

📅︎ Nov 27 2019

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Why is it so hard to get trees out of the forest?

Because they’re so sticky

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👤︎ u/martianrome

📅︎ Aug 04 2019

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Always think hard before you get married because on one hand you have a cool ring but on the other hand you don’t

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👤︎ u/CHEEZY_21

📅︎ Oct 25 2019

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I've been trying to get with a strange woman who lives in a Motel but she's playing hard to get.

Everytime I knock on her door she won't let me Inn.

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👤︎ u/trollcitybandit

📅︎ Oct 15 2019

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How do I get hard at the same time every night?

It's just like cockwork!

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👤︎ u/Danielj6725

📅︎ Jun 08 2019

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What does a Russian bride get on her wedding day that's long and hard?

A new last name.

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👤︎ u/agent_bitchpudding

📅︎ Apr 20 2019

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What kind of shower accessory is hard to get to know?

A loofah.

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👤︎ u/arielflamingoish

📅︎ Jun 28 2019

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What do you call a convenience store in a hard to get to place?

an inconvenience store

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👤︎ u/thebobe999

📅︎ Jun 03 2019

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What is called when a lizard can’t get hard?

Ereptile dysfunction

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👤︎ u/PolarisBear17

📅︎ May 04 2019

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Invisibility is very hard to get treated.

Call the doctor all you want, you're never going to be seen.

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👤︎ u/FluffyEskimo

📅︎ Mar 28 2019

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Male porn stars should get a raise because they always work hard. reddit.com/r/Showerthough…

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👤︎ u/scungillipig

📅︎ Dec 13 2017

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When the dogs get a hard day of work, they will say "it's a ruff day"

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👤︎ u/stefanreddit13

📅︎ Sep 09 2018

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Pizza jokes are really hard to get right....

....it's all in the delivery.

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👤︎ u/SoDakZak

📅︎ Sep 15 2017

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Its so hard to get pirates to walk the plank

They never want to get on board

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👤︎ u/PaxPaw

📅︎ Jan 27 2018

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I've heard it's hard to get through College

But I've gotten through just fine!..

In the front door and out the back.

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👤︎ u/Tuxedo_Muffin

📅︎ Mar 05 2018

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The decision to get an abortion is a hard one to make

you don't want to make it on an empty stomach

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👤︎ u/musamiz

📅︎ Feb 08 2017

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What do you call it when you get a hard on from burning someone over the Internet?

E-Rekt

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👤︎ u/xMilkstachex

📅︎ Nov 17 2015

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Never get into a pun war with a dad, you will lose, no matter how hard you push...

Me: Did you see that new documentary on Constipation?

The Dad: What?

Me: It hasn't come out yet...

The Dad: Hahaha. That's a hard one.

Me: lol, indeed

The Dad: That's straining.

Me: You're pushing it, [The Dad].

The Dad: I'm not even close to being finished yet!!

Me: You are really stuck on them, aren't you?

The Dad: I am just so impacted by all this.

Me: I just can't get a good joke out...

The Dad: Oh, It's out now... I just can't drop it.

Me: lol. You may be the king of puns...

The Dad: It's an over thirty Dad thing...

His Wife: Yeah, you are full of it.

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👤︎ u/damnittohelljeb

📅︎ Dec 19 2013

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What do you get when you cross a hard playing pianist and an organ?

A sex joke.

As an upcoming new dad, first kid expected in May, I am getting my practice in!

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👤︎ u/thestamp

📅︎ Nov 10 2014

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What do you call a cult that’s hard to get into?

Diffi-cult

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👤︎ u/LucaKasai

📅︎ Sep 27 2018

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