Why is my stud finder constantly going off even when it isn't touching the wall?

Oh wait... I'm holding it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ndisa44
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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I was tool shopping yesterday, and happened to walk by the stud-finders.

The noise was unbearable.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rwsdwr
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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I went to the Home Improvement store this weekend and walked past the stud finders...

The noise was unbearable.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SerbianTarHeel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
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Ordered a Stud Finder on Amazon and forgot to give them a shipping address.

Still made it to my door.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoodleMaps
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2020
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What do you call an old German currency that can double as a page finder?

A book mark.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFailureKing
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
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Is the β€œStud Finder” joke the quintessential dad joke?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Odinspawn2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
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Stud finder

Was headed home from work to wall mount my TV, wanted to swing by my parents to get my dads stud finder. His reply is priceless.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dougisfast
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
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Wife asked me to hang some pictures, I said no worries I got a stud finder

But it always go off when I pick it up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EarthlyStranger
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2018
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Hey Dad do you have a stud finder?

Your Mum found me, didn't she?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/4orbes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2018
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Got a stud finder for Christmas

We had to take the battery’s out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickahippo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2018
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"Dad, how does a stud finder even work? Does it just beep at the wall or what?"

"Oh, Alcoholicia, I have a hell of a time with them - they just keep going off every time I pick one up." - Dad.

"Oh well maybe I shouldn't buy one if I can't fig... Wait. Oh my God, Dad, you're so embarrassing." - Me

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alcoholicia
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2017
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How to do the stud finder joke - a step by step guide (may not work for all models of stud finder)

Discovered this today while hanging a curtain rod.

I am using the zircon one step stud finder, seen here http://m.acehardware.com//product/index.jsp?productId=1298011&KPID=997266&cid=CAPLA:G:Shopping_-Measuring_Tools/Marking_Tools-_New&pla=pla_997266&k_clickid=21a0e1ae-1f94-44cd-b27e-a6a83ba1fdc1

Begin by using the stud finder to locate a stud as normal. Release the button.

Lift the stud finder off the wall slightly and press the button. This will help calibrate the stud finder to "empty space", making it think that any hard surface is a stud.

Quickly place the stud finder on your chest, onto your breastbone, the stud finder should beep indicating it is on a stud.

Make joke as normal

This saves you from making the beep noise yourself, which, in my opinion weakens the joke.

This way the tool itself confirms that you're a stud.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jsgunn
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2016
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Stud Finder

Dad: Have you seen my stud finder? Me: Maybe it found a stud and lived happily ever after. Dad: tearing up I have nothing left to teach you.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jade_vk
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2015
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Looking for some tools (variation on the "stud finder" oldie but goodie)

Wife asked me to hang up some new wall decorations she picked up. One was a little heavy so I wanted to nail into a couple studs instead of just using drywall anchors. She saw me rooting around in the garage and asked what I was looking for.

"My stud finder. Wish I could turn it on remotely so it would just find me instead!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/captainwoj
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2014
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Stud-Finders

My brother, my dad, and I were getting ready to move, and we started talking about the different stud-finders we own. My dad says something along the lines of "We only have, and need, one stud-finder. Your mom is a great one!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Howzieky
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2014
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Sister needed to borrow the stud finder

"Sure! Mom is usually done at work around 4."

My sister just turned around and left the house.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Everun
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2014
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Oh dad stop it
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dufosho
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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Today, I asked who left their cold-smoked herrings on the ground at the market but no one answered.

Well, finders kippers.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wilackan
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
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It's always important to do an operational check of your tools.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Buwaro
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
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Hey ladies, are you looking for a stud?

Well, I got the STD now all I need is u.

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2017
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Every Dad Know What to Do With This.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rad1030
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2013
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Dad and I were building a storage shed. His pocket starts to beep until I got annoyed. I said β€œDad, what is that beeping? Turn it off!”

He pulls out a handheld plastic device and says β€œSorry kiddo, I left my Stud Finder on.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrOddYazz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
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What do you call a construction worker who is good at matchmaking?

A stud finder

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SevenEyes
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
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I went to Home Depot so I could find a boyfriend

I heard they sell stud finders.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/glyph-bellchime
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2018
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Dad dropped this one when discussing Christmas gifts.

Sister: "Dad, what you want for Christmas?" Dad: "Well, I put a stud finder on my wish list on Amazon. But I dunno, last time I borrowed one to hang a picture, it didn't work." "Why not?" "It kept pointing to me."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RianonFTW
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2013
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A woman went to the police station to report her husband as missing

The officer asked her if she tried using a stud finder

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uglyoldbob
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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The classic-est of Dad jokes

My dad was helping me put up a mountable TV stand in my apartment. He takes out his stud-finder and holds it up to his chest, chuckling, "Hey look, I found a stud". My mom gave the same eye-roll and half-smile she's been giving him for the past 38 years.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/atlantis145
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2013
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Trying to help my dad put up shelving.

He says, "I cant use that stud finder. it goes off every time I go near it."

He couldn't be the only dad to ever use this one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/underthedock
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2014
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I dadjoked my boss today. He didn't see it coming.

So I work retail and I was restocking shelves on a hardware isle with tools, doohickeys, and thingies. He was walking and talking with a new boss (training him and such) when they stopped at my isle. They didn't really notice me so it was perfect.

I picked up a stud finder and hit 'em with a classic!

"Hey guys check it out! It's a stud finder" Runs it over chest "Beep beep beep. Oh hey it's working!"

My boss had a few chuckles and the other guy said something about it being stupid but smiled anyways. Me? I was laughing my ass off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheUndeadKid
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2014
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Every time we were putting screws in the wall...

Dad would turn on the stud finder, point it at himself and say "Found one!"

Every. Time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dr_Kelvin
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2014
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"I'm going to hang some new shelves, and I broke my mirror...

...can I borrow your stud finder?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HarveySpecter
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2014
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Got my dad while working around the house today...

I was helping my dad hang up some towel racks in the bathroom. I turned on the stud finder and held up to my chest. When it beeped I looked my dad in the eyes and said "I think we've found a stud." He groaned, but I could tell he was proud of me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mandiblesx
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2014
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My husband during our kitchen remodel dropped a dad joke

Placing the stud finder to his chest, he exclaimed "Beep, beep, beep! I'm a stud!" I couldn't help but burst out laughing...this is why he's my best friend.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cocochanelle87
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2014
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Girlfriend got me while hanging hooks

I was using a stud finder to make sure the fixture I was hanging had enough support

"I've never seen a stud this big"

Girlfriend responds and points at me

"I have"

Palm to face and she laughed so hard she stopped breathing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pgroepper09
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2015
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I think my newly wed co-worker is practicing for the future.

(Me and co-worker discussing him moving into my apartment complex this weekend)

Me: Well are you sure you can mount a TV on it? One of the largest walls in my living room is poured in place concrete. Can't hang anything on it.

Him: Yea i checked its a stud wall. I just need to go out and get a stud finder.

Me: Just come over and borrow mine if you'd like.

Him: Actually I should probably just use [my wife], she's pretty good at finding studs.

queue: groans from myself and all surrounding co-workers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mad_Rhetoric
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2015
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A classic dad joke

picks up stud finder

"Hmmm let's test it to see if it works"

makes beeping sound as he waves it over himself

"Yep! Seems fine to me!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rikplaysbass
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2014
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My father made me a shelf for Christmas...

I asked him to hang it up on my wall for me. He refused to use a stud finder. He said they always go off whenever he holds them.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LankyLangston
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2014
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Parents came over today

Bought a new house with plaster walls, mentioned I needed a stud finder to hang pictures.

Parents come over today to see grandchild and my mom looks at my dad and asks did you bring the stud finder?

My dad immediately responds "Why would I need too, I'm here aren't I?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/darkendvoid
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2015
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