False Puns

A list of puns related to "False"

I once glued a set of false teeth onto a boomerang...

... that came back to bite me.

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👤︎ u/slatersays22
📅︎ Feb 03 2021
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I’m not sure if it’s true or false that he is the Prime Minister of Canada, but that his name is Justin

is Trudeau

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👤︎ u/DutchBlob
📅︎ Jan 09 2021
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What do you can 2 false statements that are so bad they stun you?

Paralyze (pair of lies)

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👤︎ u/TwoDimensionalCube83
📅︎ Nov 03 2020
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My mother's mother lost her false teeth at the retirement home. We searched the place everywhere but couldn't find them.

We looked in every nook and granny!

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ May 21 2020
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I knew this girl who wanted bigger boobs, but couldn't afford proper implants, so she had her uncle make her a false set out of pine.Would be great if I had a punchline to go with that though,

Would be great if I had a punchline to go with that though, wooden tit?

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👤︎ u/IAMBiSH
📅︎ Apr 26 2020
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How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 17 2019
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My kid came home in tears after one too many True/False tests...

something needs to be done about boolean in schools

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👤︎ u/errsta
📅︎ Jul 21 2019
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Teacher: “True or False? The Declaration of Independence was written in Philadelphia.”

Student: “False. It was written in ink.”

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👤︎ u/RobRoy333
📅︎ Jul 04 2019
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What do you call George Washington's false teeth?

Presidentures

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👤︎ u/danwright32
📅︎ Mar 07 2018
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When I was 12, I was disqualified from a track meet for too many false starts. To cheer me up, my Dad...

took me to Dairy Queen. As he handed me my medium Skor Blizzard he said, "Here you go, a DQ you can feel good about." I laughed and felt better.

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👤︎ u/Freklred
📅︎ Jan 12 2016
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The leader of a church kept making false doomsday predictions.

The church recently filed to be a non-prophet organization.

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👤︎ u/IchWillRingen
📅︎ Jun 29 2018
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A false statement.

Sleep is for the week.

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👤︎ u/qoutes
📅︎ Apr 28 2018
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Saw this store in the mall today called Justice, but it seems like false advertising.

Looks like they sell a lot more than just ice in there

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👤︎ u/GuyFromThePost
📅︎ Mar 14 2018
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Nothing says false enthusiasm like...

"Cheap Spirits"

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👤︎ u/tehEPICNESS
📅︎ Nov 27 2017
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Apparently someone got arrested here for making false instruments.

I guess those instruments must have been lyres.

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👤︎ u/edderiofer
📅︎ Aug 29 2015
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Not your false one

For his school ID card and such, my brother needed to procure a picture of himself, so naturally he took a selfie. He was so proud of this selfie that he shared it on Facebook, and captioned it "My TRU picture" (TRU being the university he was due to attend).

Our dad was the first commenter, with this gold: "Your Tru picture, not your false one"

My brother could only comment, "Dad why"

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👤︎ u/goldanred
📅︎ Jul 06 2015
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How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 11 2019
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How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 18 2019
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How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 10 2019
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How are false teeth like stars?

They come out at night!

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👤︎ u/notdadbot
📅︎ Nov 03 2019
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