That's a moray
βThatβs a Moray!β
That's a moray.
That's a moray.
Dad: Easy - you just throw a click bait into the water
Son: Got it. What's next?
Dad: What happens next will shock you
Me : For starters, I bring a lot to the table
He prescribed me some anti-BackTearyEel lotion to take care of it.
Hi punsters! My wife and I would like to request your help for naming the following party food items with Hawaiian puns. We are hosting a Hawaiian themed baby shower for my wife. The plan is to put tags next to each item.
Ex: Poke bowls: Gotta catch βem all
Cheese Dips
Salsa Dips
Tortilla Chips
Chocolate Covered Strawberries
Nutter Butter Cookies
Samosas
Cake Pops (shaped like coconuts)
Cup Cakes
Coconut Trifles
Edible Arrangements (Cut up fruit)
Thank you!
We can be taste buds
Well, Iβve got a few Twix up my sleeve.
Thatβs not a lizard, the store clerk told me. Thatβs a stand-up chameleon
Indian places are naan profit, Vietnamese places are pho profit.
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
--Edit-- I appreciate the condolences. I'm doing well and the worst is behind me and my family. But thanks :)
--Edit-- Massive thanks for all the awards and kind words. And the puns! Love 'em.
A boo-rito
Heβs assembling his cabinet.
The sauerkraut has arrived but the wurst is yet to come
A grilled Cheesebooger
I still feel like I dyed on the inside.
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
Cantaloupe
Ships and salsa!
β¦daughter and I created this together. I couldnβt be more proud.
A hamburghini
I told her it was all ingest.
Making it all the way home and realizing that they forgot one of the containers:
Riceless
Ra-man
Air-vrything.
I'm so proud.
Doc: Sounds like tacocardia.
they lack taste.
It didnβt make the cut.
They'd traded jokes, played pop music, and generally made people's lives a touch brighter as they trundled to work.
Now, though, there was silence on the air. Ernie silently reread the fax message from the Department of Defense. As licensed broadcasters they were legally obligated to alert the public, to tell them the nukes were flying and that in a few minutes all the world's troubles would be over. What, though, was the point of that? To torture people with the knowledge of something they couldn't change?
Their eyes met and a decision was reached. Bert put on their most requested song, a sugary top 40 tune while Ernie produced a bottle of bourbon from under the desk. As their producer banged on the locked studio door the colleagues toasted the end of a long career.
Bert, always the consummate professional, turned away from the window as the first explosion split the distant horizon. He straightened his tie, tucked in his shirt, and brushed his hair back. He would meet his fiery death with dignity.
He turned to Ernie and said in a quiet, resigned voice, "How do I look, Ernie?"
Ernie walked slowly over to his friend. He looked into Bert's face and saw the closeness they shared, the strength of their relationship, forged over the years. He took a deep breath and spoke quietly:
"With your eyes, Bert."
I told him that you had to peel the outer layer.
That's a moray
I mean, pho queue, people.
handshakes
I think they misunderstood when I said "I wanna watch"
But then it started to grow on me
Itβs called Wedding cake
Swordfish. Buahahahahahahahaha
Arrrrtichokes!
Ought dogs.
Just dig your feet into the sand, then you will have buriedtoes
stolen from: food jokes
Taco Bell
Iβm on season eight. Still not sure what this has to do with security.
