Me: I just bought Tupacs of Eminems for 50 cents

Wife: That's Ludacris, how Kanye West your money like that?

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👤︎ u/hishernia
📅︎ Jun 26 2018
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Book vs the Movie

My daughter read the book "The Talented Mr. Ripley" in her English class. Then we watched the movie starring Matt Damon and Jude Law (who plays Dickie). My daughter kept telling me what's different in the movie compared to the book..like Dickie is a painter not a musician, etc. After she telling me a bunch of differences, I asked "In the book, does Jude Law play Dickie?"

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/thewhiskey
📅︎ Apr 04 2017
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A couple of dad jokes from the father-in-law (mild language)

Dunlap Disease:

Everytime we pass a fairly overweight person, he says:

Him: "Poor guy, he's got Dunlap's Disease. His belly done lapped over his pants."

Dicky-Do Disease:

Him: "Poor guy, he's got the Dicky-do Disease. His stomach pokes farther out than his dicky do."

My father-in-law, ladies and gents.

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/Top_Drawer
📅︎ Apr 06 2014
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