Counting sheep Puns

I’m a Geiger counter.

That's because the sheepdog rounded them up

The dog replies "I rounded them up".

My son and I found this cheesy riddle online. Why is it easier to count cows than sheep? Because you can use a cowculator.

After much derisive snorting, I said “But I could also use a spreadsheep.”

"What? We should only have 37!" I replied.

"I know" he said, "I rounded them up".

- "How many sheep do you have?"

- "I don't know. Every time I start counting them, I fall asleep."

and my teacher starts counting wavelengths to help us learn a concept. "One lambda, two lambda, three lambda" suddenly I chime in "man, I thought I was the only one trying to fall asleep here". My teacher looked at me obviously ready to scold me but before he does I proudly explain myself "Get it? Like counting sheep!". Believe me, the groan my classmates gave me was one for the ages.

" It's my new counting system, see that special collar on me dog, it's got a camera and it scans the sheep as the dog rounds them up. "

"Damn me, what'll they think of next? What's it called?"

"Baa codes mate"

But I got tired of counting sheep.

Today I drove my father to physical therapy. We passed a field full of sheep and the shepherd was walking along the fence. I said "It looks like he is counting them", my dad says to me "probably came out to count them, but now he is just sleep walking".

They finish and the dog says "I counted 40 sheep"

The farmer replies, "Weird, I only got 37"

The dog replies "I rounded them up"