Cooking pun of the year
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︎ Oct 23 2019
I invited my girlfriend over for dinner to have sausages and mash. I warned her that I'm not a very good cook though.
I wanted her to be prepared for the Wurst.
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︎ Oct 21 2021
Why donβt cannibals ever cook noodles?
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︎ Oct 01 2021
A paragraph of cooking/food based puns
Yam know, I know alot of ice food plums. I can dumpling em on you right now desprite the pickle I'm in. They're pretea cheesey but they get cheddar! There's eggndless pastabilities when it cucumbers to word plate. I doughn't meat to egg you on butter you should really try it! Just lettuce loose. Mustard up the courage to ketchup with the times and mayoby relish in the potgress of bready made humor! I know it mayo seem fishy butter you'll loaf it! I know you vegemight not carrot about puns but they're truly bratworth it! Clam on, don't be a chicken! Don't let your creams be creams! You donut know what you're mincing! Yah goatta be nuts not to try it once! I meat, water you doing right now anywaffer? Once you do, orange you be glad you tried? I'll even pear you up with someone you can make grape puns with! I'm sugar you'll be able to bake olive the amazucchini ones I'm saying right now! There'll be so much to tacobout. Though, I hope you don't have any beef. I don't think I'm stroganoff to stop boba you if you fight. I won't be able to cashew . Cerealously. Soooda...I guess you batter be ice and things will be all peachy! Oh to be a pizza the fun.. Man, I can go on but I'm dragonfruitn' this out and I avocadon't wanna come off as souper corny. So, lettuce toast to the cake world of puns and mango on like never before!
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︎ Oct 20 2021
Why do masochists cook with gas?
Because theyβre pro-pain enthusiasts.
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︎ Oct 27 2021
I never trusted that cook
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︎ Oct 18 2021
Dwane Johnson just got into Asian cooking
He now goes by βthe wokβ
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︎ Oct 21 2021
How does Lady Gaga like her meat cooked?
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︎ Jul 23 2021
My friend was feeling rushed and stressed about not having enough herbs for his cooking.
I told him about a substitution he could make and he was relieved, replying βthank you for the sage advice. I did not have enough thyme for thisβ
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︎ Oct 10 2021
Scientists discovered the first fries were in fact not cooked in France...
They were first cooked in Greece
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︎ Oct 09 2021
What do you need when you have to cook something big, quickly?
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︎ Oct 22 2021
My motherβs cooked dinners used to be so bland
But Iβll admit theyβve gotten better with thyme (based on a true story)
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︎ Sep 23 2021
What do you call a magician who's good at cooking?
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︎ Jul 24 2021
Cooking
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︎ Apr 01 2021
The guy who cooks eggs at my local cafΓ© gave me some great tips on storing pheasant and rabbit meat
A poacher is the best gamekeeper after all
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︎ Oct 06 2021
And some kosher salt
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︎ Oct 16 2021
I was planning on cooking alligator for dinner tonight...
...but I only have a Croc Pot.
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︎ Aug 22 2021
Whenever I'm cooking lentils, I try to use golden lentils.
I find that they're a legume above the rest.
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︎ Oct 09 2021
Hey guys! Did you hear about the fancy new cooking show that got cancelled after only one episode?
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︎ Sep 15 2021
My wife was upset because she doesnβt think I like her cookingβ¦
To prove her wrong, I had another slice of gravy.
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︎ Sep 04 2021
I was going to cook alligator for dinner.
Until I realized I only had a croc pot.
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︎ Aug 30 2021
Cooked a pizza tonight, didnβt have a pizza cutter, so I used my Bryan Adams CD,
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︎ Sep 04 2021
A teenaged girl rolled her eyes as her mom was cooking eggs for her father.
Thatβs her typical reaction to dadβs yolks.
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︎ Aug 02 2021
What is the best pan to cook sushi in?
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︎ Aug 13 2021
So someone once told me they wanted to cook Alligatorβ¦
But they said they only had a crockpot
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︎ Aug 15 2021
I sent my son to a German cooking school camp, but all he got to do is add herbs to sausages.
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︎ Jul 16 2021
Why did the mad cook insist everyone eat the mussel-sultana soup?
Purely for shellfish raisins.
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︎ Aug 29 2021
Last night I experimented cooking some Ribeyes with cannabis oil.
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︎ Jun 28 2021
Why did the Liverpool fan always help his wife cook Chinese?
So sheβd never wok alone.
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︎ Jul 29 2021
What do you call a cook at The International House of Pancakes?
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︎ Jul 09 2021
One good way to cook chicken is in the back of a large steam train where the coal is stored.
It makes the meat very tender.
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︎ Jul 17 2021
How do you cook an alligator
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︎ Jun 27 2021
What do you call a zombie cooking stir fry?
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︎ Jul 19 2021
I'm a line cook and looking for a way to get in on some of the extra cash that servers earn.
Got any tips you can share?
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︎ Jun 14 2021
I was once a trusted member of a totally secret cooking society. But they kicked me out..
..for spilling the beans.
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︎ Jun 18 2021
Recently watched an Australian cooking show where the chef got applauded for making meringue
Strange...usually Australians boo meringue
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︎ Jun 14 2021
Cooks naming countries
If there was a country made surrounded by water, would they call it marination?
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︎ Aug 02 2021
Did you know the first French fries weren't cooked in France?
They were cooked in grease
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︎ Oct 20 2021
I was going to cook alligator for dinner.
But I realized that I only have a croc pot.
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︎ Aug 19 2021
The first French frys werenβt cooked in France
They were cooked in grease!
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︎ Jul 12 2021
Why don't cannibals cook their food?
They prefer raw men.
(ramen).
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︎ Sep 02 2021
Did you know the first French fries werenβt cooked in France?
They were cooked in Greece.
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︎ Sep 05 2021
Wanted to cook alligator for dinner tonight
But all I had was a croc pot
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︎ Jul 19 2021
I was going to cook alligator for dinner...
Then I realised I only had a croc pot
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︎ Aug 18 2021
I wanted to cook alligator for dinner
But all I had was a Croc pot
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︎ Aug 18 2021
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