Black eyed pea Puns

Well I am.

[this one is actually technically a mom joke]

...and I was explaining how the practice originated during the American Civil War, but they're still young, so I had to explain how we got into the war.

Me (Dad): "...so the South didn't like what the North was doing and they decided they wanted to quit the country."

Wife (Mom): "AND THEY SECEDED! ... Get it? SECEDED! HAHAHAHHA! It's like succeeded, but it... nobody?"

At least I didn't wake up with them stuck in my teeth

It was called Easy Peasy.

The main dish will be Lambchop seasoned with Red Hot Chili Peppers & Salt-n-Pepa.

Accompanied by the side dishes: The Cranberries, Korn, and Black Eyed Peas.

And for dessert we'll have Vanilla Ice..Cream..Cake.

First you cut a hole in the ice. Then you put black eyed peas around the hole. When the bear comes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole.

My grandad told me that one when i was six.

Will.i.am