What did the dad tell his son after their beagle ran away?

doggone

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Different_Fox
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do beagles make good pets?

If they were average, they would be seagulls

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nomiis19
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
🚨︎ report
If you get a dachshund for badgers, a beagle for rabbits, and a lab for ducks, what kind of dog do you get for play?

A plott hound

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of dog always knows what is going on?

Aware wolf.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/numberthu
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
🚨︎ report
It's a beagle.
πŸ‘︎ 139
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/13thmurder
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2014
🚨︎ report
How do you turn a beagle into a bird?

Remove the "b"!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ryzikx
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2017
🚨︎ report
What smells better than it tastes?

A nose

πŸ‘︎ 78
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Crossbreed every type of dog!

... until all you’re left with is an everything beagle

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/joemanncpt
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay?

Because then they would be bagels.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Legendx_X
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2019
🚨︎ report
My dogs started playing β€œLucy in the Sky with Diamonds”

Should’ve known since they are the Beagles..

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/changhaobyu
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What kind of dog goes well with cream cheese?

A Beagle.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nukesup
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
My dad thinks he came up with a winner

What comes before seagull?

Beagle

Please don’t punch me hahahhaa

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Exentr1x
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I got a rooster on 2018's Valentine's day.

Lol, on last year's Valentine's day my best friend had got mad at me for not asking my crush out.

We'd planned on going to McDonald's together because he didn't have a date either. When I arrived at McDonald's this f*cker was holding a cardboard box with a terrified look and when he saw me he immediately gave me the box and told me he'd already bought the food and that we better take the bus to my place. I just thought he probably was joking or something because the box didn't even have any kind of decoration, it even had a chips brand printed on it, but as we got to the bus and sat I felt something moving inside, I thought maybe it was a puppy or something, but why did he look scared of it?

So, we get to my house, I go to my backyard, where my then 7yo beagle was and I open the box. I could only see a black blur flying out of it and then heard my best friend scream. It was a rooster. He's terrified of birds. And weirdest of all it was a fully grown rooster but he was super tiny, like 10 inches tall tiny.

I asked him wtf was going on and he just kinda hid behind the backyard door and said "I bought it so that you could get some cock tonight". I always make puns and he hates them, I was speechless. So long story short I now own 6 chickens and 4 roosters (my mom got super mad at him for buying the rooster, but then she got super attached and bought him a chicken, when she laid eggs she let them hatch, the rooster's name is Enrique btw, my mom even made him a birthday party and all last week, lol)

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ArbiterInqui
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Imagine, if you will, a futuristic dystopian society

In this society, companies and businesses are not legally allowed to give themselves a name. Instead, companies are ID's alphanumerically. The first businesses were Corporation A, Company B, Business C, ... Organization Z, Company A1, etc.

The world's current largest corporation is Company B. They're particularly known for their robotics manufacturing. One day, Company B had just finished the design for two new robots. One that would automatically play blues songs on a record player at the press of a button. (What we know today as a jukebox) The other was a companion robot for lonely people, modeled after a beagle.

Unfortunately, when the final version of these robots were being manufactured for a worldwide release, there was an error in the automated assembly line. This error caused the two robots to be built simultaneously, creating a single robot.

The resulting product came to be known as the Boogie Woogie Beagle Bot of Company B.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MrMcSwaggerton
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2015
🚨︎ report
she wanted the dog.

housemate 1. : "I'd love a beagle"

me: "what the space probe?"

Housemate 2. : "sigh* shut up...are they difficult to manage?"

me: "i'd expect so, it took half of NASA to put it on mars"

the response was furrowed brow's and giggles.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ridik_ulass
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2014
🚨︎ report
I just got dad joked by my buddy...

My dog, a beagle, was trying to get comfortable in my chair.

I said to the dog: "dammit Blue you're bugging the hell out of me."

My buddy: "Would you say he is hounding ya?"

Commence groan.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/glcorps2814
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.