The tall guy who tips off the ball to start basketball games was found deceased at mid-court...

Dead center.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
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Legend has it that basketball used to be played with glass beads, and we only started using rubber balls in the 1800s.

Switching was indeed a marbleless idea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/timeforclock
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
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I'm not the type to hog the ball when playing basketball

...so I'll pass

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
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A really bad Russian basketball player had a free throw so he threw the ball and ...

got nothin but nyet.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dghughes
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2016
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Why are cats so bad as basketball?

They shoot too many hair balls.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JournalofFailure
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/randomredditor512
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2019
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Why is Cinderella not good at basketball?

Because she always runs away from the ball

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rosseepoo
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
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Man, I sucked at my basketball game yesterday...

I really dropped the ball.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Majikin__
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2019
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What do you call it when a pro basketballer has no kids to inherit his wealth?

An Heir-ball

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eotzuofug
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2018
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I asked my dad why he always says I need to work on my defense when I play basketball alone.

Cause the ball keeps going over de'fence'

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BaudG
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2014
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My dad is 6'9"...

When people ask how tall he is, he likes to respond, "I'm 5-foot-21", or "I'm 5'10", I just have really long legs".

When people say, "I'll bet you played basketball in school" (he did, and was fantastic), he facepalms and says "Basketball! I wish I would have thought of that!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mizzousaphone
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2013
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Puns for Kids

The funniest and shortest puns for kids, you always remember while teaching children puns, try to choose the short ones because they are easy for them to remember and register.

Puns for Kids

Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!


What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!


Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.


What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room? Odor in the court!


Two silkworms had a race. They ended up in a tie.


Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.


The streets in the capital of Afghanistan are paved with Kabulstones.


How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? Pleased to eat you.


What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn? An egg roll!


No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.


Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!


What musical is about a train conductor? β€œMy Fare, Lady”.


A man drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.


What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.


What animals are on legal documents? Seals!


Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny!


Why did the bumble bee leave the house? It heard the school was having a spelling bee.


Being struck by lightning is really a shocking experience!


How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!


Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!


Dockyard: A physician’s garden.


What did the angry mother say to the boiling pot of spaghetti? Simmer down!


The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.


β€œWhat’s purple and 5000 miles long?” β€œOoh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”


Every calendar’s days are numbered.


This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. β€œFour bucks,” says the bartender. β€œPut it on my bill.”


I used to be twins. My mother has a picture of me when I was two.


What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!


When does a well-dressed lion look like a weed? When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion).


Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.


A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2017
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Dad for the win last night.

So my family and I are all gathering around the TV watching the Notre Dame & North Carolina basketball game last night, when out of nowhere my dog starts dry humping the air.

It's absolutely hilarious when he does it, and it all never fails to make everyone laugh hysterically. Take in mind that my dog is neutered so he's super horny but, obviously doesn't really no what he's doing since his baby makers were chopped off. Anyways, my brothers trying to get him to come to him and he's just sitting there looking at him with this his devious little dog face.

Angrily, my brother says,

"He's probably so disobedient because you guys had to go and cut off his balls."

Everyone nodded their heads agreeably, except my dad who mumbles,

"Yeah Matt, that must explain why he never comes."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Huv
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2016
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Last day of Junior High P.E.

Today,The kids were asked to put everything from their lockers into garbage sack before they could play basketball. Several "look how big my sack is/quit touching my sack" jokes followed. I said, "quit talking about your sacks, or you won't be able to play with the balls." Apparently dadjokes overlap with junior high jokes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/IthinkIwannaLeia
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2015
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My dad just forwarded this email to me...

> > Balls > > > > INTERESTING OBSERVATION > > 1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL. > > > > > > > > > > 2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING. > > > > > > > > > > 3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL. > > > > > > > > 4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL. > > > > > > > > > > 5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS. > > And... > > > > > > > > 6. The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is > > GOLF. > > > > THE AMAZING CONCLUSION: > > > > The higher you go in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls > > become. > > There must be a boat load of people in Ottawa and Queen's Park > > playing marbles. > > You know you WILL PASS THIS ONE ON!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BladeNoob
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2014
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