Sacre bleu
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πŸ‘€︎ u/puntasm81
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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I was at a restaurant with my dad, I asked him if he was getting the Chicken Cordon Bleu or the Chicken Kiev.

He said, "the Cordon Bleu's good, but I hear the Kiev is revolting."

(groan)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/atomicbolt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2014
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Did you know vampires arent real?

Unless you Count Dracula

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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I absentmindedly bought a block of cheese. As soon as I unwrapped it, it spoke, saying, "I'm depressed. Can you help with this sadness?"

Damn. I picked up bleu cheese.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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What do you call a cheesy dad joke that has reached maturity?

Full groan

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πŸ‘€︎ u/brooke_pollockkk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2020
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Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion?

It was Parmageddon,all the was left was debrie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuccYaNan69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
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What do you call a row of people lifting mozzarella?

A cheesy pick up line.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lord_Webthryst
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2018
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Why was the cheese sad?

Because it was bleu....

I know I know cheesy joke.. but surely we can all agree it was still gouda!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jcnet1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2020
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Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de brie

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaintMyBagel
πŸ“…︎ Apr 15 2017
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I asked my chef friend if they ever serve steak raw...

He said yeah but it's rare.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wardez
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2018
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What do politicians eat for dinner?

Democrats: chicken cordon bleu

Republicans: chicken cordon red

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πŸ‘€︎ u/devasohouse
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2018
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I told my wife they I had a joke about cheese

And not to worry, because it's a gouda one.

She groaned. So I asked how I could make it cheddar.

She was frowning. I told her not to be so bleu.

Then I stopped because it was getting stiltoned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dedtired
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2017
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A discussion I had with a woman over E-mail, Ripe with dad jokes.

Me:That's one of my specialties! Yesterday when one of my coworkers playfully hit me with curtains I threatened to have her arrested for assault with a thread-ly weapon.

Her: That's so cheesy, but so gouda.

M: Hearing you say that makes me feel grate!

H: Course! I couldn't just let it brie without returning with a different pun. :)

M: I'm so glad we curd share this moment, it keeps me from feeling bleu.

H: Are you stilton going on about this? It could be seen as a provelone.

M: No Whey! Really? I accepted Cheeses into my life a long time ago.

H: Well, I believe that there is more out there than Cheeses, with your Parmesan I could continue. Too bad I am bread tired, and wish to be loafing around. Good night and sweet dreams

M: Well, early to Bread early to Rise, as they say. You have sweet dreams. Oh, and don't ask Rye if I'm in them

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LegendofDragoon
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2016
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Halloween Costume

My friend's dad was telling me about a costume idea he had yesterday

"You put on a blue shirt, wrap an electrical cord around yourself, and then tie a rubber chicken to it"

His costume? Chicken Cordon Bleu

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheAlfiandOmega
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2013
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