Like a good Grandpa I share with my 12 yr old Grandson the amazement of r/dadjokes regularly. He thinks you all are totally cool. I told him there is much power here. How? He asked. Let me demonstrate... With the diahrrea song.. I'll start.
Some people think it's gross but it's really good on toast. Diahrrea...
Damn amazing pun from this guy (credit: u/IronSheep5318)
Do you think anyone has ever slapped Dwayne Johnson on the butt and then proclaimed, "well I've hit rock bottom"
Edit: get consent people
"Mr. Rock, may I slap your behind for the sake of an amazing pun that the people will remember for years to come"
Just got out of a great interview with an amazing new job...
They told me they were looking for someone responsible! I told them this was perfect, whenever something went wrong at my old job they always said I was responsible.
Just read an amazing account of a 13th-Century siege.
Just read an amazing account of a 13th-Century siege.
The attackers killed the duke's son, knocking him from the battlements with a peasant's severed head fired from a trebuchet.
It was the first recorded instance of a serf-face-to-heir missile.
From Twitter.
Wife amazed that the price of the soil for her garden was 4.95/50lb bag
I told her thats dirt cheap
It just happened. I'm evolving
Why is the invisible man an amazing employee?
Because good help is hard to find.
2021 better be amazing...
because after that is 2020 too.
The inventor of the bomb was so amazed by his invention...
I found this amazing bluegrass band that does covers of 80s rock.
They call themselves Ban Jovi.
My sister didn't get my pun
I got into an argument with someone I thought was a "birds aren't real" supporter. I'm an idiot; they were just messing with me and they made some amazing bird puns along the way that deserve attention. The link to the post is in the comments so you can go give the user karma and see the context.
https://preview.redd.it/n7zvpwxkj6m51.png?width=1280&format=png&auto=webp&s=54f0549ebd3c055929698d6fef3bc05782bf5282
Bullets are real odd
They only do their job once they’re fired
My invention was amazing! After many many attempts, I finally got a two-wheeled vehicle to stand on its own!
I guess tri, tri again is the way.
People are always amazed by the skilled tattoo artists in Spain
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision
What is Karen's favourite keyboard shortcut?
Ctrl,shift,esc.
(Task manager shortcut)
I’ve recently discovered I’m terrified of elevators, so I’m taking steps to avoid them.
I was a little afraid of speed bumps too, but I’m slowly getting over them!
UPDATE: Thank you so much for all the upvotes and amazing responses, fellow Dad Joke lovers.
You make the world a happier place! 🤩
It's amazing how some word's spellings change between America and Britain
For instance, in America they call Tyrannosaurus Rex a T-Rex and in England they call them a Tea-Rex
down under the periodic table.
What do you call a vegetable that is almost amazing?
Papito never fails to amaze
An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all watching a street performer doing some amazing juggling
The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a poor few of the show. So, the juggler stands on a wooden box and asks, “Can you all see me now?”
“Yes”
“Oui”
“Si”
“Ja”
Just taught my 6yr old calculus and advanced physics. Amazing what kids can learn.
Which happens to be jack shit.
It is amazing how a considerable ammount of people think chocolate milk comes from brown cows...
But I am still looking for the pink cows!
I started reading an article on Stockholm syndrome.
At first it was terrible, but by the end, I found amazing.
It’s amazing how most jars look alike...
The resemblance is uncanny
Just rolling it out for ya
The nose puns are amazing.
What is considerably more valuable than a dad bod?
It's amazing..to use the fridge at my work, you don't even need an appointment!
Last night, there was such an amazing stand-up comedian at the party that we decided to raise our glasses filled with alcohol to praise him.
My local paper has done amazing work in exposing corruption in our local chicken farms.
They deserve a pullet-zer prize.
Merry Christmas here's a ginger bread house.
The comments section is amazing
How much does it cost to get your ears pierced in Tampa Bay?
A Buccaneer
Good win for them tonight.
My daughter was so amazed at the size of her moms woman toes.
I offered to show her my mentos.
My little Sister: What's more amazing than a talking dog?
Me: What?
Her: A spelling bee
I've started investing in stocks: beef, chicken and vegetable
One day, I hope to be a bouillonaire!
A magician was walking down the street, and then he turned into a grocery store.
It was quite the amazing trick.
My sister may be a single mother but she had an amazing dad joke..
She was giving my niece (3) and nephew (6) a bath. When they were done, the kids used their towels as capes and were running around naked yelling 'we are super heroes!!'
My sister responded with, 'I don't think think there are any naked superheroes... Except maybe The Flash.'
My daughter and I went to the grocery store yesterday, and we were amazed by the quality of the produce. We spoke with the Department Manager and offered to buy all of their Romaine
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