Doctor: "Alcoholism is a disease. "
Barman: "Get your shots here."
Where can you look up the definitions of drug abuse, alcoholism, and problem gambling?
If alcohol can damage your short term memory
Imagine the damage alcohol can do.
I'm fine with alcohol and weed, but cocaine is where I draw the line !
Marine iguana's should be as legal as alcohol!
My dad was an alcoholic who wanted to be a lawyer
He could never pass the bar
Why are all ghosts considered alcoholics?
Because they take Boos everywhere they go!
Why can’t alcoholics become lawyers?
Because they can never just pass a bar.
Some people have an addiction to alcohol, some to drugs.
Mine was to sandpaper. It was wearing me down.
My horses have started to make alcohol
I've been told I'm an alcoholic....
I decided to drink about it.
On my ochem exam i was asked what IPA (isopropyl alcohol) was used for
Where does a Canadian alcoholic go to get help?
What do you get when you mix alcohol and literature?
Tequila Mockingbird
My dad told me this a few months ago. And he loves to remind me of it every week. It is his dadiest dad joke. It makes him so happy and that makes me happy. Hope it made some of you smile!
Did you hear the alcoholic skydiver is feeling unwell
He's coming down with a cold one
Why did the Mexican alcohol manufacturer chuck his wife off a cliff?
My dad’s answer to everything is alcohol....
He doesn’t drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles...
Who was King Arthur's alcoholic knight?
What do you call alcoholics anonymous in Canada?
My doctor said I should drink alcohol in moderation. I don't think I can control my drinking...
... but it's worth a shot!
What's the difference between a sneaky alcoholic and a clumsy plastic surgeon?
One takes a nip of the tipple, the other takes the tip off a nipple.
What do alcoholic horses drink?
Why are ghosts alcoholics?
They drink too much booo-ze
Recent studies are examining the effects of replacing birdbath water with alcohol
Its bird-gin-ing research.
What happened to the alcoholic gymnast?
They were prone to rolling blackouts.
What do you get when you mix alcohol with pressure in a small space?
If coffee comes from coffee beans, where does alcohol come from?
Alcoholics don’t run in my family
But sometimes they fall down the stairs.
The government started banning alcoholic drinks, so I'm selling liquor in secret.
Last night, there was such an amazing stand-up comedian at the party that we decided to raise our glasses filled with alcohol to praise him.
My friends and I were discussing about different kinds of alcoholic drinks, and this guy kept talking about a Japanese one
What is the alcoholic outdoorsman’s favorite drink?
Studies show alcoholic law students...
...are more likely to have trouble passing the bar.
Why did the alcohol run away?
It was tired of being drunk.
An alcoholic wakes up in prison
He asks the first police officer he sees, "Why am I here?"
"For drinking," replies the officer.
"Great," says the man, "when do we start?"
What did the alcoholic sheep say when asked where he wanted to go?
Where do mice get their illegal alcohol?
I have no trouble holding my alcohol
unless the glass is slippery
My Canadian cousin used to be an alcoholic
He's doing better since he joined the Eh Eh
Drinking alcohol removes pimples.
Not from me, but from other people.
If alcohol can damage your short term memory
Just think what alcohol can do!
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
