I have been a part of free Britney since 1999

We called it Napster back then

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/piccolorick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2021
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I was shopping at the grocery store like it was 1999. That’s when I realized the party was over...

Oops, they were out of thyme.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cyberentomology
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
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Did you ever hear of the horrific cow massacre of 1999?

It was an udder disaster

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skeeter-gunz
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2019
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I have a photographic memory.

But I ran out of film in 1999.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PensionNo8124
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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A woman is walking through the park when she sees a very attractive man sitting on a park bench. He's reading a book and eating some fruit out of a Tupperware container. Slowly the woman gathers the courage to go ask the man out...

So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."

Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"

"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."

The man can't believe it.

"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"

Naturally, they're both shocked.

"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."

Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."

They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.

"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"

The man puts down his fruit and responds,

"It's a date!"

πŸ‘︎ 17k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2020
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If two vegans got into a fight...

is it still considered a beef?

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rowingforfun
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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A man goes to the doctor, and says "doctor, I havent been peeing correctly and its painful". The doctor replies "I will have to perform a prostate exam." As the doctor examines the man, he pulls out an $100 bill out of his bottom. This continues, he keeps pulling out money from this man's bottom.

After about half an hour the doctor says..."You won't believe this, but i just pulled $1999 out of your bottom"

The man turns around and says "Yeah, I wasn't feeling 2 grand"

πŸ‘︎ 67
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πŸ‘€︎ u/domheffo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
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I've had to pee for 17 years.

Tonight, I'm gonna potty like it's 1999.

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/autoscopy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2016
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Son, you know you're a true 90's kid...

...when you look at your birth certificate and it says that you were born between 1990 and 1999.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2016
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Someone care to explain this dad joke to me?

http://namelesspcs.com/?comic=dad-jokes-1999

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fummy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2015
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