I have a friend who owns a yachting business, but had to work from home due to the pandemic...

Now his sails are through the roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DNDLoser07
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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I was midway between the bow and the stern of my 120 foot yacht when suddenly I was surrounded by submarines that just surfaced...

I was amidship man.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2021
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I'm going to start a yacht building business in my attic

Sails should go through the roof

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πŸ‘€︎ u/joelthomastr
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2021
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What causes all the super-yachts to squeeze together in the same tourist spots?

Pier pressure.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blarty97
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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My Son just told me this one:

Son: I can spell Yacht!

Dad: Ok, spell Yacht

Son: Y-A-H-T

Dad: You forgot the C

Son: No, it’s under the Yacht

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/echosixwhiskey
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2021
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What did the German millionaire say about his yacht?

.... It's verboten

Made up for my son when he was 5 forever ago

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dbcher
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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What do you call the bow of a Benetau yacht?

The beginning of a beautiful French ship.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andrewszabo
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2020
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Did you hear about the Yacht builder that had to work from home?

His sails went through the roof

πŸ‘︎ 181
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RavenxMiyagi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2020
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Started a business building Yachts at home during the Lockdown..

..and the Sails have gone through the roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2020
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There once was a ship

My mom walks into my room

Mom: David how do you spell Yacht

Me: Y-A-H-T

Mom: isn't there a C in it?

Me: I hope not otherwise it's sunk

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DapperDavidYT
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
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My yacht passenger was rude to me when he gruffly asked "how will we embark upon our trip?"

So I told him to shove off.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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Why is β€œyacht” spelled that way instead of like β€œyot?”

Because why nacht.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
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This quarantine has provided me the perfect opportunity to start a yacht making company in my attic...

Sails are through the roof!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/void_burglar
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
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What do you call Fidel Castro's yacht?

A dictatorship

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dane_Axe
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2019
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On my yacht, I make one of the crew dress in cute costume to stand for the pole supporting the yards, booms, and rigging...

He's my mast-cot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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French guy, showing off his yacht collection: This is Un. Here is Deux, Trois, Quatre and, finally, Six.

Her: Where is the 5th?

French guy: Cinq.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2019
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Help!!! There's nobody steering this yacht!!

Don't worry. It's on yachtopilot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fiestapepper
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
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If Kim Jong-un had a private yacht, it would be a dictator ship
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WilsonHanks
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2015
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My friend sailed his yacht into the wharf very rapidly, crashing into the dock and causing a dent in the hull...

It's just a berth mark, he swears.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
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36 foot yacht
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OpenSourcePro
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2018
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Mike Tyson bought a yacht and immediately wrecked it.

Who woulda thunk it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
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Best game to play on a huge boat?

Yacht-zee

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
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I’d like to buy a catamaran or a yacht.

I’d like to get the best of boat words.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2018
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My dad wants a yacht
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πŸ‘€︎ u/YEEEA
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2013
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What does the yacht inspector do?

Makes sure everything is ship shape.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/woefulStargazer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2017
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Why do they condition all of the I.V. bottles at the hospital?

Everyone loves smooth saline!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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A couple of my favourites...

Why do Swedish warships have barcodes one them? So that when they dock, they can Scandinavian.

And then these work as a one-two punch:

I started a business building yachts from home...sails have been going through the roof.

And before that I had a business clearing the fallen leaves from people's backyards. I was raking it in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tel-aran-rhiod
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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Why are big boats called "Yachts"?

Because they cost "Yachts of money".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WPBDoc
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2013
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I was thinking about buying a luxury boat

But it costs a yacht more than I thought

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2020
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What do you call a boat that doesn't allow criticism?

A censor-ship

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cat_Poker5
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
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I don’t believe in boats

I have yacht to see one

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πŸ‘€︎ u/caitlynnus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
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Have you ever been on a party boat?

It’s a Yacht of fun.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sockspuppy1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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What game do sailors love most?

Yacht-zee

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wawoodworth
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2019
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The Wong and White wedding

While in high school, Dana White met and fell in love with David Wong. After a few months the couple decided to get married. Dana insisted on getting married at sunset on the ocean on a yacht. The big day finally arrived and both families joined together to head out for the wedding. The captain of the yacht, checked the weather and saw a storm brewing. He advised the party it was not safe to travel out, but Dana and David both insisted they were going to get married on the ocean at sunset, so everyone loaded up and the boat departed. Sure enough just as the captain was performing the ceremony the storm hit, and the boat capsized killing everyone aboard. The next day the head of the the NTSB, Mr. Perry made this statement. It was a stormy night. So many Wong's and Whites. Neither would change their headstrong ways. The sea was in a rage. The captain turned the page. Their dying wasn't worth what they paid.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2018
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What do you call a dumb boat?

An idi-yacht.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/howlingechidna
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
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My favorite nautically-themed dice game...

is "yacht-sea"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CronoZero15
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2016
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We've got two.

I was telling dad (a Bostonian) about Larry Ellison's massive private yacht.

"Yeah? I've got two yachts. A front yacht and a back yacht."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hobbit6
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2013
🚨︎ report
I started a business building Yachts in my attic

Sails are through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 704
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mallander
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2018
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I just started a business building yachts in my attic.

Sails are already through the roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DadJoker1988
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
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I started a successful enterprise building yachts in my attic

Sales are through the roof

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jthornborrow21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
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I started a business building yachts in my attic.

Sails are through the roof.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
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I recently opened a yacht business in my attic

Sails are through the roof!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lordranch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
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I've started a business building yachts in my attic.

Sails are going through the roof.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jwhiteboy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2017
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I started a new business making yachts in my attic this year

The sails are going through the roof

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/akjohnston87
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2016
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