Come, Watson
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πŸ‘€︎ u/worldstallest
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2021
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Sherlock and Watson arrived on the scene of a murder and the only clue was a measuring tape pulled out to exactly 12 inches.

Apparently something was afoot.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kesavadh
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
🚨︎ report
If Watson isn't the most famous doctor...

...Then Who is.

πŸ‘︎ 423
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrPackinwud
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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β€œHey, Watson, is that mud on your shoes?”

β€œNo. Shit, Sherlock.”

πŸ‘︎ 218
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip. ..

After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

"I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes," replies Watson.

"And what do you deduce from that?"

Watson ponders for a minute.

"Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?"

Holmes is silent for a moment. "Watson, you idiot!" he says. "Someone has stolen our tent!"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
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What did Watson say to Sherlock Holmes after peeing?

No shit, Sherlock

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shity_redditor
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
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Detective Holmes: "Watson, what's taking so long in there?"

Watson (constipated): "No shit, Sherlock."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/misterrandom1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2020
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Watson and Holmes go out camping.

Holmes noticed that Watson was looking a bit sick for a few days.

"What's wrong, Watson?", he asked. "You seem a bit down."

"Nothing, Holmes. Just having some stomach problems." Watson said. "Constipation, you know. I've suffered for a while."

"Constipation? So you have trouble answering the, ahem, nature's call?" Holmes asked.

"No shit, Sherlock."

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ribdunge
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2020
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Emma Watson

I just shook Emma WATTson's hand , I was so shocked.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sabresdewolf
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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Holmes and Watson are creeping stealthy along the Street, searching for clues, when Holmes suddenly spots a Bakery shop window and scans it with his magnifying glass. Watson perplexed, says to Sherlock " What are you looking for exactly ? " ...Holmes replies...

" You know my method. It's founded upon the observation of Trifles. "

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
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As we were watching a DVD, I asked my son, "Do you know Emma Watson's full name?" He shook his head and I continued...

Emmamentary Mydear Watson!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2020
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Sherlock Holmes: My dear Watson, you have a mole on your right upper thigh. /r/Jokes/comments/fu4m13/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kookykau
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03 2020
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When it finally dawned on Watson that it was the limestone he exclaimed β€œBut Holmes, how did you know?!” /r/3amjokes/comments/fmr0…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DenVosReinaert
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
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Sherlock was gardening when Watson came over and asked what he was planting.

"A lemon tree, my dear Watson".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/keithasaurus
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2018
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Why did Watson go to Los Angeles for his next case?

Because that’s where he was told he could find Holmes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boricimo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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Holmes: "Is that mud on your boots?" Watson: "No, shit, Sherlock"

Holmes: "Is that comforter on your bed?" Watson: "No, sheet, Sherlock"

Holmes: "Is that a long note on your desk?" Watson: "No, chit, Sherlock"

Holmes: "Is that your residence?" Watson: "No, shed, Sherlock"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What did Watson and Crick study when they discovered DNA?

Rosalind Franklin’s notes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
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Sherlock and Watson visit a murder scene

Sherlock inspects the body and notes that the man doesn't have anything covering his top. Watson looks at Sherlock and says "Yeah, no shirt, Sherlock!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/propersquid
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2019
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As the new year was approaching, Watson was out having a few pints with his old drinking buddies

β€œAh yes, Sherlock fancies himself quite the chef. You really must come visit us for dinner Friday at old 221B! There’s no place like Holmes’ for the hollandaise!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
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It's elementary, my dear Watson
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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Spooder_Matt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2018
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What do you call Watson when sherlock isn't around?

Holmeless

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pinkninja1228
πŸ“…︎ Jan 22 2019
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β€œWatson, you look constipated!”

β€œNo sh*t, Sherlock.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 28 2018
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I convinced my wife to go to the Xmas party as Sherlock and Watson...

She didn't think it was very Christmassy until I sang that "I'll be Holmes for Christmas..."

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wmcduff
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
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There are stray Watsons in my backyard

I think they need good Holmes.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/louisng114
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2019
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Sherlock and Watson
πŸ‘︎ 136
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vanillagueriller
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2014
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Watson is heavily constipated. Holmes, for once, is stumped.

He asks Watson what the problem is.

Watson replies: "No shit, Sherlock!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hootanahalf
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2018
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Sherlock Holmes and John Watson are stranded on a deserted island

Sherlock says: We need to get off of this island!

Watson says: No ship, Sherlock!

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FwostBytee
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2018
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sherlock and watson camping in the woods

Sherlock says look up watson, what do you see? Wayson says, stars. Dedeuce says sherlock. Well therer's millions of them replies watson. deduece further demands sherlock! well a lot of them are galaxies, and if I do the math, there must be life around least one of them, replies watson.

And more asks sherlock?

Well if there is life around at least one star, it stands to reason that there is intelligence up there, says watson.

That's great replies sherlock, but you never noticed that someone has stolen our fucking tent.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/eltegs
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2018
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Watson walks in on Sherlock...

Watson walks in on Sherlock having sex with a younger looking girl..

"Bloody hell, Sherlock! What'd you think you're doing bangin' that chick. She looks like she's in highschool" Sherlock replied, "Elementary, my dear Watson"

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dropmeister
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2017
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New car named "Watson the Wagon"

My wife and I purchased a car last night and since she would be using the car the most, I said she could name it. It is a VW Passat station wagon.

She decided on "Watson the Wagon" as she is a huge Sherlock Holmes enthusiast.

This afternoon she said, "If the A/C goes out in the car you can say 'It's a bit warm in here Watson'".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kingpin0825
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2015
🚨︎ report
What did Sherlock Holmes say to Watson at the top of the ski run?

I'll get to the bottom of this!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wavemotiondan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2016
🚨︎ report
Emma Watson

If Emma Watson will have a son and she won't change her last name, I hope this conversation will happen some day between the child and the parent:

> Son: Hey, dad?

> Father: Watson?

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tehyosh
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2014
🚨︎ report
β€œHey Watson, is that mud on your boots?”

β€œNo, shit, Sherlock.”

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
β€œWatson, what does constipation mean?”

β€œNo shit, Sherlock”

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamverymature69
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2020
🚨︎ report
If Watson isn't the most famous doctor in the world...

Then Who is.

πŸ‘︎ 58
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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
If Watson isn't the most famous doctor in the world...

Then Who is.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
🚨︎ report
If Watson isn't the most famous doctor in the world

then Who is

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rocketshoe21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
How did Dr.Watson explain his constipation to Sherlock?

He said,"No shit Sherlock."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PraBatCatMan
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2019
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β€œHey, Watson, why are you taking Ex-Lax?”

No shit, Sherlock.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2018
🚨︎ report

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