Tumor Puns

A list of puns related to "Tumor"

What do you call a helpful tumor?

A cyst.

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👤︎ u/1mandelbrot1
📅︎ Dec 22 2020
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Did you hear about the bingo caller who had a tumor biopsied?

It was B-9.

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👤︎ u/andersonfmly
📅︎ Nov 07 2020
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A surgeon had three surgeries assigned to the same day. After the first one he said: "One done, tumor to go"
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👤︎ u/Pilot230
📅︎ May 08 2020
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I got a tumor from playing so much BINGO.

Thankfully it was B-09.

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👤︎ u/gevis
📅︎ Jun 19 2020
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I had a tumor that made it uncomfortable to lie on my back, so I had to sleep face down.

Doc said it was prostrate cancer.

Guess I'm prone.

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👤︎ u/lfantine
📅︎ Jul 16 2020
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I’ve got a tumor on my leg. I didn’t enjoy it the first few months...

but it’s growing on me.

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👤︎ u/UnicornMeat24
📅︎ Feb 26 2020
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They found tumors in my colon.

But I rectum.

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👤︎ u/Happy_Each_Day
📅︎ Sep 17 2019
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What did the dog say when the owner found one of three tumors?

“Two more”

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👤︎ u/Babyblu4321
📅︎ Dec 04 2019
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I found a tumor in the vending machine.

Don't worry though, it was B9.

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👤︎ u/fightagainst
📅︎ Oct 06 2019
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So my friend found out he had a tumor

My friend: So doc, how much do I have?
Doctor: I'm afraid it's only tumor weeks

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👤︎ u/MartinFlemz
📅︎ Nov 27 2018
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A vending machine went to the doctor to have a tumor looked at

The doctor said the tumor was B9

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👤︎ u/merconi
📅︎ Sep 02 2018
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My dad before a surgery to remove a brain tumor. It's a classic!

Dad: Will I be able to play the piano after?

Nurse: Yea of course!

Dad: Oh cool! I can't even do that right now!

Edit: Alright guys! I get it, old post! I just thought it was pretty funny considering the circumstances.

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👤︎ u/Farmfarm17
📅︎ Jan 26 2014
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My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.

I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.

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👤︎ u/xerafoo
📅︎ Nov 24 2018
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My grandmother went to the doctor and found out she has a tumor but still went to bingo right after.

It was B9, after all

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👤︎ u/yvonnescence
📅︎ Jan 26 2018
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So, someone posted something on /r/movies about Val Kilmer being rushed to hospital recently with a throat tumor.....

.....and I posted "Is it Valignant?".....which was then followed by the most downvotes I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing. Lesson learned: keep my puns to this subreddit only!

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👤︎ u/ultra-saurus
📅︎ Jan 31 2015
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What do you call Raymond's bigoted tumor?

A Ray-Cyst.

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👤︎ u/designatedjohnny
📅︎ Dec 07 2016
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Like a tumor

I was born normally, but my little sister had to be born via C section, and whenever my dad talks about this he looks at me and said that I was born right, and then turns to my little sister and says "but you were extracted, like a tumor." Every time.

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👤︎ u/bewbie
📅︎ Oct 23 2013
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Did you hear about the bingo caller who had a tumor?

Luckily, the tumor was B-9.

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👤︎ u/SonicRainboom13
📅︎ Dec 16 2015
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I found a tumor in the vending machine.

Don't worry though, it was B9.

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👤︎ u/fightagainst
📅︎ Mar 29 2018
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My dad before a surgery to remove a brain tumor. It's a classic!

Dad: Will I be able to play the piano after? Nurse: Yea of course! Dad: Oh cool! I can't even do that right now! Edit: Alright guys! I get it, old post! I just thought it was pretty funny considering the circumstances.

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👤︎ u/shahrig23
📅︎ Jan 23 2017
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