For the past few days, I wake up to see someone has dumped a bunch of LEGO blocks on my front porch.
I don’t know what to make of it.
A guy threw a block of cheese at me in the supermarket
I said to him “now that’s no very mature now is it?”
How did the bagel shop owner get rid of the competition on his block?
He ran a pretty intense schmear campaign
What did one block of cheese say to the other?
Why did the author suffer writers block after rectal surgery?
He was left with only a semicolon.
I was sitting at home the other day when man broke in holding a block of cheese.
He stabbed me with it and all I could think was damn, that cheddar is sharp.
I was in the supermarket the other day when this guy threw a block of cheddar at me.
Outraged, I shouted : "Well that's not very mature is it ?"
Got up this morning and ran around the block five times
Then I got tired so I picked up the block and put it back in the toy box!
two cops go around the block and see if everything is in order...
one of them says "look, there's a dead bird!"
the other looks up into the sky
"where?"
The four building blocks of life.
Someone hit me in the head with a block of cheese.
Man that really rinds my ears.
Told my girlfriend that the wreath she bought was great, but please make sure it doesn't block the doorway.
Because then it would be a Great Barrier Wreath.
Block is here to spread the word of God! (Dunno if this is a pun)
Why did the liar stand out of the block?
Because he was an outlier
Somebody asked me how I make the snow blocks for my igloos in the winter.
I said: Usually igloo them together.
After playing our set at the local block party, a group of kids walked up to the stage and the leader laughed, "You rock pretty good for a buncha ole geezers, but why the heck did you name your band, 'Bald Patch'!?" I shrugged and said...
"To be honest, it was off the top of my head."
The kid who microwaved his toy construction blocks ended up with
An ancient Greek playwright was suffering writer’s block. Kept scribbling down lines and then tearing up the pages.
Picking up the torn pages, his friend asked, “Why Euripides?”
When Trump closes the border, if the US runs out of avocados, is that just one big guac block?
This morning I climbed up to the beehive in my yard and used putty to block the exit.
I got a block of iron in the mail
I guess you can say I finally have a fe mail in my life
Why was there an H&R Block in the Ocean?
Someone should build a gay club out of legos and name it "The Cock Block."
What did the block of ice say when it saw the letter E?
I was walking down the street when a group of kids threw a block of cheese off me, they burst into laughter and I yelled
“That’s not mature is it”
I was building a tower out of blocks and decided to use a box fan at the bottom
The fast-food chicken place down the block is having a Hillary Clinton special - 5-piece meal for $5...
...two small breasts, two large thighs, and a left wing.
A man on the street threw a bottle of milk and a block of cheese at me
Guac block: when a girl is too obsessed with the guacamole to notice your sexual advances at the party
Just a few blocks down the street... (X-post from r/funny)
Chip off the old block
Me to my 5 year old daughter: Do not ask me to go to the park again!
My daughter: "can we go to the park"
Me: Which part of "do not ask" didn't you understand?
My 7 year old son: "not"
Dad's been around the block a time or two...
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.
I'm trying to keep fit during iso, so this morning, I ran five times around the block.
I was so tired afterwards that my son had to put it back into the toy box.
I was in the supermarket when a guy threw a block of cheese at me.
I looked over at him and shouted, “Well that’s not very mature is it??”
This morning, I jogged around the block 15 times.
Then I picked it up, and put it back in my kid’s toy box.
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