Swedish people like to add syrup to their espresso.

It Swedens the coffee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EnChanted96
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
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What do Swedish people put in their coffee?

Artifical Swedeners

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
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I'm surprised people in the Swedish capital are so reluctant to go on lockdown

You'd think they were used to being stuck home

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rhinosorcery
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2020
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Why don't Swedish people need to worry about security in marine events?

Because they scan the navy in

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeardedDeath
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2017
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A couple of my favourites...

Why do Swedish warships have barcodes one them? So that when they dock, they can Scandinavian.

And then these work as a one-two punch:

I started a business building yachts from home...sails have been going through the roof.

And before that I had a business clearing the fallen leaves from people's backyards. I was raking it in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tel-aran-rhiod
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
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Guy annoys girlfriend with puns at Ikea
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GabuTheBunny
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2015
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These puns are Capital!

So I had a productive day at work coming up with these Capital City puns a year ago today. Thought they were too good not to share!

Why did the Geordie arrange a holiday to Romania?

To book a rest!

Bob Mortimer was speaking to his comedy partner's wife saying he wanted to take him on a piss up to Iceland. When asked why he said:

I want to wreck ya vic!

Why should you never let a man go swimming in Finland with weights on his ankles?

Coz He'll sinky

What do people most commonly use toilet paper for in Bandar Seri Begawan?

Their Brunei

Catwoman bet her male counterpart he couldn't pronouce the capitol of Nepal. But cat man do.

Why was the Polish man rubbing his bollocks? Coz they warsaw.

I just came up with a cracking pun for Japan. Alas, all the wife could say was "What Tokyo so long?"

The ex Mrs McCartney got naked in East Germany in the 80s. She was known for years in the area as Bare-lin

Cheap flights to Russia still available! Book now! Everything Moscow!

The people of Bahamas think learning Capitol cities is Nassau important

The people of the Netherlands had a need to build a water driven power station as well as an overabundance of pork products. So they used 'Ams to Dam a river.

A husband and wife in the Phillipines were both very, very unwell. The woman was sick, but the man iller.

What's the average Senegalian's favoured mode of transport? Da car

Have you heard about the talking cat in Somalia that only throws insults? The Moggy Diss you

They are obsessed with John Cleese in Uruguay. They love a video of Fawlty towers almost as much as they love a Montevideo

People from Vietnam Hanoi the hell outta me

Rain storms are very rare in Zambia, but in Zimbabwe they Harera

Before you do a joke about Macedonia, let me Skopje right there

I've heard Swedish Ikea workers get stuff for free, they can just take Stockholm

If you are trying to eat Halal in Pakistan, Islamabad or good choice?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spoghead
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
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Just found this sub, am I going to be a dad?

Seriously, give it to me straight; are people all a bunch of liars, when they say that dad jokes makes them cringe and groan? I mean, I checked the first few pages sorted by top, and I haven't realised that this is EXACTLY my kind of humour until now. I had to keep myself from bursting into laughter at the office today multiple times. So, am I going to be an awesome dad or am I just someone who isn't afraid to admit that dad jokes are the best thing in the world?

Also, came up with my own swedish dad joke (translated). I 'd take a picture from a hill or a balcony and caption it with "Today's high point" (high point= swedish expression of highlight, highlight of the day basically)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RevolveDUDE
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2014
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