A list of puns related to "Stutters"
Its a shame that he won’t finish his sentence
He didn't finish his sentence
Severe head trauma could result.
Before he could finish his sentence!
(Don't know if it's been done before, please don't hurt me)
I don't think he'll ever finish his sentence
The judge says he'll have a hard time with his sentence.
The student replies, “No sir, my dad has a stutter, but the guy who registered my name was an asshole.”
He's never gonna finish his sentence
Kid: Wh... wh... why? I... I'm pretty g... good at it.
They always stick to their word.
EH?
He never got to finish his sentence
The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing.
The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"
Again, the clerk doesn't answer him.
The guy asks several more times: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"
And the clerk just seems to ignore him.
Finally, the guy storms off in anger.
The customer who was waiting in line behind the guy asks the clerk, "Why wouldn't you answer that guy's question?"
The clerk answers, "D-d-d-do you th-th-th-think I w-w-w-want to get b-b-b-beat up?!!"
"what watt are those?"
He didn't even finish his sentence
She has the worst stutter ever.
He named it “CCCCCCC”
I couldn't find my voice, I stuttered, " I, I-i, I—I, I'L" I was at a loss for words
only when she wants to say something.
He never finished his sentence.
In the Stu-stu-studio.
Came up with this at work the other day. A customer asked for her purchase for free after I shared it with her.
They were starving hungry, and finally, they see a tree in the distance draped in bacon.
“Look!” says one of the cowboys, “It’s a bacon tree – we’re saved!”.
He runs towards the tree but is suddenly shot down in a hail of bullets.
With his last dying breath he stutters:
“It’s-It’s-It’s not a bacon tree... it’s-it’s a ham bush!”
he will always stutter at nein, nein, nein.
Son: D-d-dDad
Dad: Ahh he's going to say his first words
Son: D-dad I've been speaking for 30 years, stop making fun for my stutter
A stuttering man was released from prison early
He could not finish his sentence
who claims he can heal anyone with magical crystals. He announces to a crowd, “anyone who needs something healed, step right up and I can heal you with my powers!” Someone steps up, on crutches. “Hi, I’m Phil, can you fix my leg?” He asks. “Yes! Of course! Phil, step behind the curtain!” Answers the crystal guy. Then, another man steps up. “You seem fine! What’s the problem?” The crystal guy asks. “I h-h-have ha-had this st-stutter since I wa-was five.” He said. “Ok, I can fix you right up!” The crystal guy says, motioning the guy with the stutter behind the curtain. Then, he says some sort of chant, moving crystals around. Once he is done he shouts, “Phil, throw a crutch over to prove you’re healed!” A crutch goes flying over the curtain. The crowd gasps. “Now, sir, with the stutter, say something!” He shouts, showing off it worked. “U-uh Ph-Phil fe-ell d-down.”
Dad: what's a Pirates favorite crime?
Me: uh ... ?
Dad: ARRRRson! What's a Pirates favorite type of socks?
Me: I don't know dad.
Dad: ARRRRgyle! What's a Pirates favorite branch of the military?
Me: rolling eyes it's the ARRRRmy.
Dad: acting confused No, it's the Navy. Why on earth would they like the army better?
Hopefully not a repost but I very clearly remember getting caught by this one and stuttering with no response.
So I have a funny anecdote from work but my friends don't like puns as much as I do, so I'm hoping someone here will appreciate it. This happened last night.
My lead walked up to me to let me know a coworker wasn't there, he says, "Bill is dead and we killed him." I give him a blank stare because I didn't comprehend him immediately and he goes, "it was a reference to Nietzsche." (German philosopher known for "God is dead and we killed him.") "it was a Neitzsche joke." So I responded with "that's cool bud, but I believe it's pronounced 'niche'." He stutters for a moment, "no, it's- oh." I burst out into laughter and he walks away with a "fuck you". 😂
I feel like half the fun of a dad joke is always your father's reaction. You know that stupid grin or him slamming on the steering wheel. I mean I was wondering if it was possible for people to try to get a snap shot of their father in action. I know dad jokes is text only but I thought it would make the joke more funny with a quality visual.
BACK STORY:
So I got a new job through one of my good friends, and while working with him I shook hands with my boss Chad, awesome guy. As we were making small talk I was stuttering a bit, and my good friend, Neil, loves messing with me about it.
Me: Yeah, that sounds g-g-great
Neil: T-T-TODAY JUNIOR, jeez can your mouth ever talk straight?
Chad: Hey it's legal now so if his mouth wants that, it's none of my business and more power to him.
Me: But my mouth is bi
Neil:Bi what?
Me: Bi my nose
Chad laughed hard, this will be a great job. More dad jokes to come, I'm sure
So she said: "You should write 'Sammy' on the litter box."
Me: (Look at her dumbfounded for a moment, stutter mildly and speak quietly for emphasis, like how you would when telling a family member that a mutual loved one is very ill) "M-Mom...I..I don't think he can read."
She brain farted while we were talking and stuttered a couple times. Finally after I kept laughing she said "Im done talking in your presence" and I answered "What about my gifts?" The death stare was worth it.
before he could finish his sentence.
He died before he could finish his sentence.
He didn’t even finish his sentence.
He couldn’t even finish his sentence
She has the worst stutter ever.
She has the worst stutter ever.
She really has the worst stutter ever.
She has the world worst stutter.
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