The nurse at the sperm bank asked if I wanted to masturbate in the cup

I replied: I know I am pretty good, but I don’t think I’m ready to compete just yet

πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JayCola93
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road?

Because you wear the wrong sock this morning

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/puzzAndpuff
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 19 2021
🚨︎ report
How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank ?

Just phone them up and say, "I can't cum. "

πŸ‘οΈŽ 44
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2021
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the king sperm that was good at maths?

His name was Sir Cumference

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Klutzy-Bandicoot-685
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 18 2021
🚨︎ report
What does a worker at the Irish sperm bank say after you are finished?

Tanks fo' nut'in

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Matjesfiletmayo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 17 2021
🚨︎ report
What is written by the exit to the sperm bank?

Thanks for coming!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Negalugh
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 07 2021
🚨︎ report
A man in Yorkshire, England forgot about his appointment at the sperm bank.

When he finally arrived, the person at the desk told him, β€œEjaculate”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wontonio_the_ninja
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 27 2021
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, Carpenter, and Julius Caesar walked into a bar

... He came, he saw, he conquered

πŸ‘οΈŽ 140
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/viky_boy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
A man walks into a sperm bank

The doctor says "would you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 194
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/baconlover09
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know that a single sperm contains 37.5 MB of DNA information? Meaning that, during 3 seconds long ejaculation, more than 11,250 TERA bytes of information is transmitted.

That's alot of information to swallow.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RealTheAsh
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
You know how only the strongest sperm gets to fertilise the egg?

I guess you could call it survival of the fetus.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RespectfulRat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the sperm donor say when he had to cancel his appointment?

– I can’t come.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 97
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/taroqi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What do the X-men call their sperm?

The C-men

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jaimegon123
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call sperm from a cheating soldier?

Dishonorable discharge.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/New-Kekistan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
What does a receptionist at a sperm bank say as the client is leaving?

Thanks for cuming and cum again.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sarcasticpremed
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I got fired from the sperm bank today

Cause every time someone walked in I'd say "get a load of this guy"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 204
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BigBadBulldog
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2020
🚨︎ report
(Beatles) Come together, sperm and egg..

O-vary

I dont even know if this make sense, I should have been asleepp 4 hours ago

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NewOrleansNinja
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
A whale is masturbating. His sperm shoots out and thanks him.

He replies " You're whale cum!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/poogart
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Sperm is amazing

sperm can go from swimming to disappointing just in some years

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Clumsy-_-Phoenix
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What does the sign say at the exit of the sperm bank?

"Thank you for cumming"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Thom581K
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 07 2020
🚨︎ report
Sperm jokes
πŸ‘οΈŽ 296
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Lawyer_Morty04
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Got fired from the sperm bank yesterday

Apparently you’re not allowed to nudge the nearest co-worker and say β€œget a load of this guy” every time someone walks in.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 140
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kmarkie_mark
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I applied to be a sperm donor recently and the nurse asked me if I could masturbate in the cup.

I told her I’ve done it a few times before but I don’t know if I’m ready to compete in a tournament.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 71
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/rurgtide
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I just created a word for sharing Sperm.

Cummunism.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SergeantPotatoes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Sperm bank
πŸ‘οΈŽ 128
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheBrontosaurus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I got fired from the sperm bank

They said I can't drink on the job

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/michaelveyrocks
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Her: Why have you been drawing pictures of sperm all day?

Me: Because sex cells.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PickleFart69
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the sperm say to the egg?

Nice to gamet you.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nottherobotoverlords
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Who decided to name it a β€˜sperm whale’

A group of seamen

πŸ‘οΈŽ 120
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MalonesCones
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2018
🚨︎ report
I can’t be the only one thinking this... it must take a real set of balls to become a sperm donor
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sxbih
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do sperm play football?

In a con-dome...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/lifelonglifter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 22 2019
🚨︎ report
One sperm asks the other "How long till we get to the ovaries?"

The other sperm replies "A while, we've only just passed the tonsils"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/B-man44
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road?

Because I put on the wrong socks this morning.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 86
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What does it say on the exit door to the sperm bank?

Thanks for coming......

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/_I-Have-A-Plan_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road?

I put the wrong socks on this morning

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/takuache_beaner
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
🚨︎ report
A sperm, a carpenter, and julius ceaser walk into a bar

He came, he saw, he conquered

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Da_Brootalz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
A man walks into a sperm bank.

The doctor says, "Would you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 77
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/wmd1234
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road today?

Because I wore the wrong Socks on...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Waizun
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Guy walks into a sperm bank

Doctor says "will you get a load of this guy?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/QuellinIt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road?

Because I put on the wrong sock this morning...

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/h_cordeiro8
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 17 2020
🚨︎ report
How do you cancel an appointment at the sperm bank?

Just ring up and say you can't cum!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ball5deeper
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, a lumberjack, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.

He came, he saw, he conquered.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 14 2020
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, a carpenter and Julius Ceasar walk into a bar.

He came, he saw, he conquered.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 218
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/moses10960
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.

He came, he saw, he conquered.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, a Carpenter and Julius Caesar walk into a bar

He came, He saw and He conquered

πŸ‘οΈŽ 88
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PeevesPoltergist
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 26 2019
🚨︎ report
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.

He came, he saw, he conquered.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 114
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2018
🚨︎ report
Why did the sperm cross the road?

Because i decided to wear the wrong pair of socks

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/andydelbourgo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.