C'mon he is right there in the middle !
They crept in. It was pitch black and stone quiet. They were suddenly starting to regret this dare. Stupidly, only one brought a flash light. The aggressive darkness and inky black yielded with grudging compliance but always seeming to push back. They moved cautiously onward amid the dust and cobwebs. The floor creaked. They breathed in tight, quick breaths. You could hear a pin drop.
Suddenly, there was a deep moan. "OOOOOOOOUUUUU". It seemed from below them. The house had been abandoned for years. Who or what could make such a sound? The boys looked at each other, but continued on, hearts pounding in their chests.
As they proceeded into the kitchen they encountered a swarm of flies. Buzzing and beating their necks and faces, they rushed and stumbled to the door, not stopping to see what they were truly feasting on. They slammed the door behind them. Maybe a body? But no way were they going back to find out. And again came the sound, "ooooOOOOOooooOOUUU" but louder this time, and closer.
They proceeded through the dark into the dining room. They saw a fully set dining table covered in cob webs. Dust-covered regal-looking glasses, goblets and silverware adorned the table. Spiders climbed on ivory plates. Clearly a house of privilege and set for a grand feast which never happened.
Or, perhaps, met a fatal end?
They pushed on. But again that unearthly howl.
They found the basement staircase, and from below, the sounds seemed to be emanating. Could they proceed? Would they? Did they dare? Two of the boys looked at each other, faces filled with worry.
But the third said, confidently, "We're going down there." Not wanting to seem the weaker, the other two boys steeled themselves and nodded.
The stairs creaked and groaned evily under their feet. The rickety banister shook in angry defiance. Insects and vermin scattered underneath them with every step. They were descending into hell, they knew, but none would turn back.
And the sound: "oOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUuuuuUUOOOO". Now loud enough to fill not only their heads but seeming to claw at their very souls!
Now at the basement door! The antique, crying squeak of the hinges eeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEee made the boys wince and almost cover their ears. But they had to know. WHAT is making that horrible, terrible sound?
In the center of the basement lay an unholy coffin! A twisted artistic expression of murder, decay and... keep reading on reddit ➡
For context: we have a vegetable garden and a dog named Max
During dinner, my mom remarked how her stir fry was made almost entirely out of vegetables from our garden except the eggs, to which my dad said “well then we’ll just have to raise some chickens.”
I reply, “well what about Max?”, implying that he might attack the chickens.
And without hesitation my dad replies, “well he can’t lay eggs”
Thought you guys might appreciate this.
He makes some really good points.
I told her that they /r/dadjokes…
I tell him that they /r/dadjokes.
Prices get slashed!
Dad: How'd you sleep??
Everyone: Good, and you?
Dad: I slept with my eyes closed.
because they r/puns
The son said, “What’s slash dad jokes?” Kids, right!
Dad(Sitting on the computer behind me): Thewierdside come here a second.
ignore because of GTAV
Me: I'm coming!
Dad: Hi coming, i'm ejaculating.
do you know what an awkward laugh sounds like? because i do. It's when you laugh hysterically for 2 seconds then abruptly fade when you realise what your dad just said....
Oh yea, and why'd he call me on to the computer? he wanted a place to watch movies, so after that debacle, i suggested going to /r/fullmoviesonyoutube
Me: www.reddit.com slash r slash Full, Movies, on, youtube. no space
He, of course, wrote:
said it wasnt working then laughed when he told me he typed in exactly what i said.